Help please - need quotes/references

[Raouf]

Dear Friends,

I am looking for some quotes, sayings, stories, sermons, etc...by the Church Fathers or modern holy elders regarding the topics of Virginity and Purity.

Specifically, I am referring to pre-marital virginity/purity not celibacy vs. marriage. The purpose is for a talk with youth about the importance of virginity and purity...

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

In Christ,
Raouf

[Asteriktos]

Unfortunately, I doubt that there are very many texts like that in the Church Fathers, simply because people (children) were engaged and married very shortly after (or even sometimes before) puberty hit, so that pre-marital sex was an extremely rare problem. Thus, most of the literature take the viginity vs. marriage standpoint because that's simply how society was run: you either were celibate or were married, there wasn't really the type of time period we have today where peoplewere running around going on dates for 10 and 15 years before they got married. So, I guess if you're looking for something from a Saint saying "You should save yourself for marriage," I wouldn't really know who to reference. Fwiw, though, here are some documents on virginity that might give you some ideas...

St. Ephraim the Syrian - On Virginity
St. Gregory of Nyssa - On Virginity
St. Ambrose of Milan - Three Books Concerning Virgins

Also, there is an essay titled Sex And the Spirit of our Age by Fr. John Weldon Hardenbrook, which is in an appendix (pp. 136-141) of the book Preserve Them, O Lord: A Guide for Orthodox Couples In Developing Marital Unity by Fr. John Mack, and it might be of some help.

[Raouf]

Asteriktos,

Thank you very much for those references...indeed I can see some relavant material in them.

In Christ,
Raouf

[Bizzlebin]

Quotes from various saints:

http://www.orthodox.net/gleanings/virginity.html

http://www.orthodox.net/gleanings/purity.html

[choirfiend]

Something the kids may not get now (being mostly selfish as all teens are, I certainly was...), the only argument that can be made without appealing necessarily to the Church is this.

Love is defined as always living and doing that which is to the other person's highest good, even if/especially when such an action requires sacrifice on the part of the lover.

A person's highest sexual good is to love their spouse, the one who has publically dedicated their lives to them and who has pledged to be with them forever.

If you are dating someone, and you love them, you will do everything that is to their highest good. Is it the person's highest good to have sex with you or to have sex with their spouse? The only answer that can come from that is B, their spouse, since they are the one who has made the committment. If you love them sexually, to do their highest good when it comes to sex, you will refrain because it is better for that person to sleep with their spouse than it is to sleep with you.

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