I'm engaged to a Copt and studying to convert. However, one thing that bothers me in Orthodoxy is what strikes me as self-abnegation. I've spent many years developing my own judgement and confidence after being plagued with depression and low self-esteem. I recognize that I am a great sinner and that I know nothing compared with God, yet if I don't trust my own perceptions and judgements it seems to me that I am left a depressed, ineffectual pushover. How does one reconcile the Orthodox view of oneself as, essentially, nothing, with psychological health?