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« Reply #450 on: January 11, 2006, 05:37:22 PM »

Uhm... the Emperor is busy right now... what about I call the Czar?
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« Reply #451 on: January 11, 2006, 05:39:47 PM »

*fumes*
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« Reply #452 on: January 11, 2006, 06:14:19 PM »

The Metropolitan of Metaxa and All Brandy has indeed attempted to confront the puritanical oppressors in this nation, and to no avail.  We will continue to support our position, and will encourage an underground movement to overthrow the oppressors and indeed bring to life the spirit of our ancestors!
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« Reply #453 on: January 11, 2006, 06:21:04 PM »

Who controls Scotch?
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« Reply #454 on: January 11, 2006, 06:23:00 PM »

I don't recall off the top of my head who the current Archbishop of Whiskey is.... I think the Bishop of Bourbon would remember...
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« Reply #455 on: January 11, 2006, 06:25:35 PM »

Scotch is a whiskey? Hmm... I know nothing baout alcoholic beverages lol  Huh
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« Reply #456 on: January 11, 2006, 06:30:20 PM »

yes, scotch is scotch whiskey.... and a fine drink indeed!
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« Reply #457 on: January 11, 2006, 06:31:58 PM »

I wouldn't know...
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« Reply #458 on: January 11, 2006, 06:35:18 PM »

That's ok, we can't all be as Alcoholic as Cleveland  Grin
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« Reply #459 on: January 11, 2006, 06:43:45 PM »

Our Inebriatedness while Bishop of Bourbon is also the Archbishop and Metropolitan of All Whiskey, thus all of it comming under Our Inebriatedness' direct jurisdiction. Though from time to time Our Inebriatedness will, as necessary, appoint Auxiliary Bishops, many of whom are also bestowed the title of Cardinal, to administer these Sees, they remain under Our Inebriatedness' direct jurisdiction.

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« Reply #460 on: January 11, 2006, 06:52:19 PM »

So... what about rubbing alcohol, alcoholic mouthwashes, and face wipes?  Huh
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« Reply #461 on: January 11, 2006, 06:56:22 PM »

Right now, as far as I can recall, the makeup of the Holy Synod is such:

His Inebriatedness, Bishop of Bourbon and All Whiskey, Supreme Pontiff
His All-Imbibedness, Metropolitan of Metaxa and All Brandy, Chief Secretariat
His All-Imbibedness, Metropolitan of Mead and All Beer
His Imbibedness, Bishop of Schlivovitz and the Vodkas
His Imbibedness, Bishop of Champagne and all Wines
His Intoxicatedness, Bishop of Everclear and all Moonshines
His Intoxicatedness, Bishop of Baccardi and all Rum

I believe that a number of the seats are being held by loci tenens until elections come for the empty seats.
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« Reply #462 on: January 11, 2006, 06:58:26 PM »

How about... His Donteatthis, Bishop of all alcoholic cosmetics?
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« Reply #463 on: January 11, 2006, 06:59:13 PM »

(It is difficult not having the official records in front of me at this moment).

I believe that all alchohols unaccounted for, such as "rubbing" and "mouthwash," fall under the Supreme Pontiff at the moment as "Alchohols of the Dispersed Intentions" until they are organized under a single diocese
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« Reply #464 on: January 11, 2006, 07:05:28 PM »

This is starting to get a little weird...
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« Reply #465 on: January 11, 2006, 07:20:43 PM »

Wait... only after 30+ pages it is starting to get weird?

I think making sure that all imbibers of alchohol and spirits are represented by hierarchs on the Holy Synod is an important issue, one that should be worked out ASAPD (As Soon As Possible while Drunk)
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« Reply #466 on: January 11, 2006, 07:23:51 PM »

I think the issue of the American tyrannical control over alcohol is much more important.  Need I say it?  *Southern accent* I can DIE for my COUN-TREE but I can't have a BEER???

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« Reply #467 on: January 11, 2006, 07:26:54 PM »

Well then - it should come back to the forefront then.  We should solicit opinions of the members here about their positions on the situation, what can be done, and why we should do it.  Then we should use the suggestions to apply political pressure to the puritanical tyrrants, while simultaneously supporting underground movements for overthrowing their terms and replacing them with representatives who are willing to shirk off this restrictive system of liquor control.
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« Reply #468 on: January 11, 2006, 07:35:38 PM »

Er, would that bring us close to having a serious conversation?  Since the #1 Stipulation in this thread is to entirely avoid seriousness, at all costs!
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« Reply #469 on: January 11, 2006, 07:43:28 PM »

Of course it wouldn't - we're talking about something that couldn't happen in this country for decades (or longer)!
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« Reply #470 on: January 11, 2006, 08:14:49 PM »

Wow...that's all, wow...
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« Reply #471 on: January 11, 2006, 08:24:05 PM »

test
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« Reply #472 on: January 12, 2006, 12:31:13 AM »

OK, well, I think one way to get the awareness out about our great Tradition is perhaps set up a booth sampling all the fine types of Alcoholic Beverages at things like Festivals and Parent-Teacher conferences where we can really reach the every-day citizen.
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« Reply #473 on: January 12, 2006, 12:44:50 AM »

I wonder how we would use our proud and rich heritage to raise awareness to the non-necessity of such a high alchohol-age such as 21...
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« Reply #474 on: January 12, 2006, 12:46:26 AM »

We could pull a Mr. Robertson & Crew and claim personal revelation as to its uselessness (that seems to reach a lot of people).
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« Reply #475 on: January 12, 2006, 12:48:18 AM »

Hmmm... maybe if the Supreme Pontiff went on TV and spoke about this "revelation" and how it needs to be implemented, he could swing some of the folk to our position... that may be able to politically push us over the top...
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« Reply #476 on: January 12, 2006, 12:49:46 AM »

Yes, but we have to make sure that we get everyone as drunk as possible before they watch him. 
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« Reply #477 on: January 12, 2006, 12:51:09 AM »

Right... so we distribute the alchohol in parachute packs into the chimneys, and then once everyone tries the liquor (which will be 190 proof but labeled 40 proof) we will then boadcast the Supreme Pontiff's message...
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« Reply #478 on: January 12, 2006, 12:51:39 AM »

Of course, I think the message is good enough that no tricks will be neccessary!
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« Reply #479 on: January 12, 2006, 12:53:32 AM »

Psh, don't post while I'm typing!

I agree with you, no tricks are neccessary - however, overcoming the staunch opposition that has plagued our fair land for hundreds of years in favor of sobriety (clearly influenced by the Sober one) may require extreme measures.
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« Reply #480 on: January 12, 2006, 12:54:46 AM »

Very true... but I think on some level, if the Truth of the Great Distiller cannot sway them without tricks, then maybe it's not worth it!  Maybe at that point, it's time to move to Aussie, or Greece...
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« Reply #481 on: January 12, 2006, 12:56:36 AM »

Don't give up the fight!

Hmm...or Canada.  It's 19 there, right?
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« Reply #482 on: January 12, 2006, 12:58:00 AM »

I think so, but maybe we need one of the Canucks themselves to answer the question (by the way, Canuck isn't considered a derogitory term, is it?  I've never gotten an answer to that question anywhere else...)
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« Reply #483 on: January 12, 2006, 12:59:34 AM »

Hmm...maybe in a picking-on-you-in-a-jokingly-way way...but I'm not sure, either.

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« Reply #484 on: January 12, 2006, 09:14:25 AM »

I think so, but maybe we need one of the Canucks themselves to answer the question (by the way, Canuck isn't considered a derogitory term, is it?ÂÂ  I've never gotten an answer to that question anywhere else...)

No, Canuck is not a derogatory term at all, unless of course you use it like Pat Buchanan "The Socialist Republic of Canuckistan".
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« Reply #485 on: January 12, 2006, 10:53:46 AM »

I'm glad to hear that I haven't insulted our Canadian friends...
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« Reply #486 on: January 12, 2006, 10:55:27 AM »

"Like maple syrup, Canada's evil oozes over the United States." - Canadian Bacon
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« Reply #487 on: January 12, 2006, 02:57:40 PM »

A Canadian bloke is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm.

His friend Randy stops him and asks, "Hey Dave! Whatcha got that case of beer for?"

"Well, I got it for my wife, you see?" answers Dave.

"Wow," exclaims Randy, "Great trade."


Not -that- funny, but Alcohol-related!
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« Reply #488 on: January 12, 2006, 04:27:28 PM »

Oh it's a little funny... but we always appreciate alchohol-related humor!
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« Reply #489 on: January 12, 2006, 04:44:11 PM »

There were two chronic alcoholics, Joe and Charlie, that were best drinking buddies. Every night they would visit the same tavern and drink all night until they closed the place. One night, just before closing
time, the alcoholic that was slightly less inebriated than his friend noticed a foul odor in the room. He started sniffing to see if he could locate the origin of this smell. He sniffed left and right, up and down.
He kept sniffing. Finally, he leaned over to his friend and took a deep whiff. Sure enough, this is where the odor was coming from.

He leaned over to his friend who was 3 sheets to the wind and said, "Hey Joe, did you mess your pants?" Joe looked up, bleary eyed and responded, "Yup!" Charlie, looking shocked, whispered back, "Well, why
don't you go clean yourself up." Joe glanced up from his glass again and said, "Because I'm not through yet!"


^ A story of inspiration that we all can learn something from.
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« Reply #490 on: January 12, 2006, 05:08:36 PM »

Ωραία!
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« Reply #491 on: January 12, 2006, 05:16:38 PM »

Whenever I'm feeling low, and the depth of my unworthiness starts to overcome me...I read this passage, and then I get drunk the best I can.
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« Reply #492 on: January 12, 2006, 05:39:26 PM »

There were two chronic alcoholics, Joe and Charlie, that were best drinking buddies. Every night they would visit the same tavern and drink all night until they closed the place. One night, just before closing
time, the alcoholic that was slightly less inebriated than his friend noticed a foul odor in the room. He started sniffing to see if he could locate the origin of this smell. He sniffed left and right, up and down.
He kept sniffing. Finally, he leaned over to his friend and took a deep whiff. Sure enough, this is where the odor was coming from.

He leaned over to his friend who was 3 sheets to the wind and said, "Hey Joe, did you mess your pants?" Joe looked up, bleary eyed and responded, "Yup!" Charlie, looking shocked, whispered back, "Well, why
don't you go clean yourself up." Joe glanced up from his glass again and said, "Because I'm not through yet!"


^ A story of inspiration that we all can learn something from.


hehehehe
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« Reply #493 on: January 12, 2006, 06:52:02 PM »

And it is examples like yours, where you are able to take consolation from the reading of alchohol-related jokes and the imbibing of the spirits that edifies the Synod of Spirits in their mission, and shows the great benefits that alchohol brings to society...
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« Reply #494 on: January 12, 2006, 07:05:35 PM »

What should we do about those whose tolerance is too high to enjoy the benefits of drunkenness?
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