Author Topic: Apologizing to an old good friend ?  (Read 149 times)

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Offline psalm110

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Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« on: March 13, 2019, 07:09:37 AM »
Hi All,

Just looking for some advice on whether I should attempt to apologize to a good friend I hurt nearly a decade ago?. It burdened me 7 years ago and I wanted to apologize but I was afraid it may of made things worse and I left it. The last several months it started to plague me again with what happened between us again and it has not stopped bothering me.

Thanks in advance

Online isxodnik

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #1 on: March 13, 2019, 07:18:09 AM »
If possible - Yes, of course.
This forum needs a spoiler button.

Offline FinnJames

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #2 on: March 13, 2019, 07:22:08 AM »
It's worth giving it a try. You don't say whether you and your friend stayed in contact or not, but it seems possible that what happened between you hurt you as much as it did your friend. An apology is sure to bring some sort of closure.

Offline LizaSymonenko

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #3 on: March 13, 2019, 12:48:34 PM »

It may be difficult...but, if you can.... try to make peace with everyone.
Conquer evil men by your gentle kindness, and make zealous men wonder at your goodness. Put the lover of legality to shame by your compassion. With the afflicted be afflicted in mind. Love all men, but keep distant from all men.
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Offline psalm110

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #4 on: March 14, 2019, 07:04:47 PM »
Has anyone else been in a similar situation like this ?

Offline SolEX01

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #5 on: March 14, 2019, 07:14:57 PM »
Has anyone else been in a similar situation like this ?

I had a falling out with a good friend after we graduated from college.  I said some terrible things.  I had a dream which told me to reconcile with him.  I apologized and attended his wedding although we don't talk much as he's busy with raising a family, growing a small business, engaging in political activism, etc.

Offline Asteriktos

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #6 on: March 14, 2019, 07:18:38 PM »
Perhaps, I am presently. About 20 years ago I hurt someone due to negligence or just downright obliviousness on my part, and this person has apparently been angry about it ever since.* Or, at least, even after a decade had passed I was told by a mutual friend that they were still angry. I've not been in the same room with this person since we were both at a funeral many years ago, and I'll probably never see them again. On the other hand, I could still contact them on social media. It gets more complicated than that, but yeah, I've been kind of avoiding decisively handling it for years.


*obviously not in a constant way, but just in rare cases when I come up in a conversation
« Last Edit: March 14, 2019, 07:20:22 PM by Asteriktos »

Offline Luke

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #7 on: March 14, 2019, 07:32:50 PM »
Has anyone else been in a similar situation like this ?
I once had an argument with a friend, and we did not speak with each other for some-odd years.  He moved a couple hundred miles South a couple years after our argument.  A few years later, I gave him a call.  I think we both did wrong with the original argument, but I wanted to mend fences.  I have not heard from him again, but from the conversation I think we are OK.  I did my part.

Offline Tzimis

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #8 on: March 14, 2019, 07:40:04 PM »
Has anyone else been in a similar situation like this ?
Yes except I was on the other end. This really isn't a big issue.  The problem I see is that you are probably from a western region originally.  So you feel like he will restrain his forgiveness in order to add additional guilt to your feelings.  Well if he or she does its anti Christian.  If you do your part and ask forgiveness than you jabe done your part. If the other party isn't willing to forgive than the sin is on them
"Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth"
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Offline Rubricnigel

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Re: Apologizing to an old good friend ?
« Reply #9 on: March 14, 2019, 09:27:55 PM »
Has anyone else been in a similar situation like this ?

We all have. Dont beat yourself up, try your best to apologize