Author Topic: I Know You Love Me - Now Let Me Die  (Read 441 times)

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Offline Arachne

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I Know You Love Me - Now Let Me Die
« on: March 18, 2017, 04:57:00 PM »
In the old days, she would be propped up on a comfy pillow, in fresh cleaned sheets under the corner window where she would, in days gone past, watch her children play. Soup would boil on the stove just in case she felt like a sip or two. Perhaps the radio softly played Al Jolson or Glenn Miller, flowers sat on the nightstand, and family quietly came and went.

These were her last days. Spent with familiar sounds, in a familiar room, with familiar smells that gave her a final chance to summon memories that will help carry her away.

She might have offered a hint of a smile or a soft squeeze of the hand but it was all right if she didn’t. She lost her own words to tell us that it’s OK to just let her die, but she trusted us to be her voice and we took that trust to heart.

You see, that’s how she used to die. We saw our elderly different then.


http://www.nextavenue.org/know-love-now-let-die/
'Evil isn't the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as evil, maybe more so, and it's a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against stupid. That might actually make a difference.'~Harry Dresden

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Offline Opus118

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Re: I Know You Love Me - Now Let Me Die
« Reply #1 on: March 18, 2017, 10:23:31 PM »
In the old days, she would be propped up on a comfy pillow, in fresh cleaned sheets under the corner window where she would, in days gone past, watch her children play. Soup would boil on the stove just in case she felt like a sip or two. Perhaps the radio softly played Al Jolson or Glenn Miller, flowers sat on the nightstand, and family quietly came and went.

These were her last days. Spent with familiar sounds, in a familiar room, with familiar smells that gave her a final chance to summon memories that will help carry her away.

She might have offered a hint of a smile or a soft squeeze of the hand but it was all right if she didn’t. She lost her own words to tell us that it’s OK to just let her die, but she trusted us to be her voice and we took that trust to heart.

You see, that’s how she used to die. We saw our elderly different then.


http://www.nextavenue.org/know-love-now-let-die/

I read the article at the author's LinkedIn page along with a number of other articles that he wrote in order to get some perspective of his views. There is more than one issue that he is addressing, so it is not clear which one or all that you thought significant. I am only going to comment on extraordinary measures to extend life (like feeding tubes, which is not  uncommon; and I am less positive with his other issues). At the LinkedIn site I would say that 99.9% of the comments were supportive. I think it is more complex and there is no set answer (in the GOA Metropolis of San Francisco where it is not necessary to impose extraordinary measures to preserve life) but one should consider what your relation wants having lived with them your entire life.
Having a directive of course is definitive but not always available.

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Offline Velsigne

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Re: I Know You Love Me - Now Let Me Die
« Reply #2 on: March 19, 2017, 12:09:29 AM »
It's not so cut and dry. 

Personal brush with hospice, December 2015:

Called by hospice worker to visit someone recently put under care.

Made the trip, couldn't really see much wrong with the person except they had middle stage Alzheimer's.

The person's wife would repeatedly tell him that he was going to die soon.   She would openly discuss his funeral in front of him.

In a private moment, the man looked at me, and asked me where I came from. 

I told him, and he replied in that old fashioned tone of innocent good natured happiness, "Oh yeah, yeah, I want to go there. I was going to go there."

Then pensive sadness, "But I'm going to die soon, they say I am dying, but please, will you take me there.  I want to go with you, please take me there!" 

"No I can't.  I'm so sorry." 

The wife returned and served him pain pills with alcohol.

Told the hospice worker my concerns.  "There is nothing we can do about that."

Two weeks later, the man was dead, was put on fatal doses of morphine until death ensued.  He really looked pretty good, could walk around, eat, even remember who I was just weeks before.  Said he had congestive heart failure and all this swelling, but his legs just had a little tiny bit of puffiness, could still see his ankles and bones.

Suspect his wife had grown tired of caring for him with her own failing health and they simply put him to sleep so they didn't have to deal with her any more and to take him off the roles.

This happened in a Red State where supposedly they are too "Christian" to do anything as immoral as allow people the choice to put themselves to sleep.  One would assume they also believe themselves to be too good to be euthanizing veterans unable to help themselves any longer.   

So they do it with morphine on their own timing and call it good. 

Ah, but at least he was at home.  Right?
A nation is not conquered until the hearts of its women are on the ground.

Then it is done, no matter how brave its warriors nor how strong their weapons -- Cheyenne proverb