Author Topic: Help me not to judge  (Read 1492 times)

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Offline suzannes

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Help me not to judge
« on: August 07, 2005, 06:01:40 PM »
Hmmm...this is a very delicate question.  I just gotta talk to *somebody,* so please forgive me, I intend NO OFFENSE.

There's a poster online, who like many here, is on several Orthodox boards.  For some reason, that is no doubt my fault, this person's posts seem to always annoy me.  I'm trying to think how to say this without being too specific, uh, well, I guess there was a discussion of coming to services on time.  This person said something to the effect of who comes late, who comes early, who lives close enough to be on time, whose kids are well-behaved in church, and I'm thinking "Honey, when do you have time to pray????"  Is there a good prayer to say, to ask God to help me be less judgmental?  I know this person is a convert, and everyone is too informal, no one takes Orthodoxy seriously enough, whatever.  Of course I'm bothered because I have so many faults of my own, but I know so many people at church who have kids with health problems, people with illnesses, I have no idea about every situation, but I suppose some people even take medications that make them so tired, maybe that can't get up on time!  A different story for each person.  Yeah, it is annoying when people come in late, but if we're "annoyed" while in God's house, that's our failing.  I always get so DEPRESSED over the "uber Orthodoxy" that one encounters online.   Can anyone suggest any good ideas for this?

Offline ozgeorge

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Re: Help me not to judge
« Reply #1 on: August 07, 2005, 06:21:38 PM »
We are all at different stages of spiritual growth. Unfortunately, those who are at the earlier stages seem to be the loudest on the Internet (like me for example!).  The thing to remember is that the more outlandish ideas will always get expressed on the Internet, because they cannot be expressed in the Living Church. It doesn't take much courage to express an idea via the anonymity provided by the Internet.
We shouldn't be like reeds bending whichever way the wind blows- like I have seen on other forums where uber-Orthodoxy becomes the norm and everyone gets on the bandwagon so as not to be left out.
Just be yourself and remember that "When in Rome do as the Romans do" may be good travel advice, but it is hardly a basis for spiritual discernment. And if uber-Orthodoxy becomes the norm, just walk away. Your salvation does not depend on belonging to an Orthodox forum.
If you're living a happy life as a Christian, you're doing something wrong.

Offline donkeyhotay

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Re: Help me not to judge
« Reply #2 on: August 08, 2005, 02:31:45 PM »
I know this person is a convert, and everyone is too informal, no one takes Orthodoxy seriously enough, whatever.

That's funny.  I am a recent convert.  Among the many things that attracted me to Orthodox worship was the unhurried approach, and the fact that no one is upset about late arrivals.  I like to get there early, just because that's a personal preference, but I like knowing that I can show up twenty or thirty minutes late and nobody would care.  Just because someone shows up late doesn't mean they aren't taking their worship seriously.  The fact that they show up at all indicates to me a commitment to worship despite whatever situation is making them late.

As for a prayer to be less judgemental:
Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner

You just can't beat the classics. :D

A dog is better than I am, for he has love and does not judge.
-Abba Xanthias

Offline choirfiend

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Re: Help me not to judge
« Reply #3 on: August 08, 2005, 02:38:49 PM »
Of course, it's also pretty standard that if you show up late (and I would temper this with being late through carelessness, not dire car-wreck on the freeway) you don't commune.
Qui cantat, bis orat

Offline djrak

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Re: Help me not to judge
« Reply #4 on: August 08, 2005, 04:41:12 PM »
Can anyone suggest any good ideas for this?
"Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father" - John 14:9

Offline year2027

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Re: Help me not to judge
« Reply #5 on: August 08, 2005, 11:17:13 PM »
God first

Beloved suzannes

God bless your heart

that is a hard thing to do but when we leave the judging up to God the rewards are big

But we are only flesh

with love and a holy spiritual kiss blowing your way Roy