Author Topic: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better  (Read 2778 times)

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Offline Maximum Bob

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Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« on: March 13, 2015, 08:49:46 PM »
My dear brothers and sisters please pray for my father. He went into the hospital in early January and has not been home since just into and out the hospital and rehabilitation centers on a rotating basis. During this time despite some initial seeming improvement overall he has not gotten better but worse. When he went in he could walk, not far but he could.  Now he can't even roll himself over in bed.  He's on dialysis 5 days a week but barely eats. He been getting sores that aren't healing but that for the moment are the only thing keeping him from being discharged due to lack of progress.

My mothers there most day but need to have a surgery herself. My siblings and I have been taking turns spending time with him but we can't stop going to work. He doesn't like to read, doesn't know how to use a computer and basically can't do anything with his hands anymore any way so has nothing to do but sit and watch TV and sleep and he's in a lot of pain. Frankly from what I can tell it's a pretty miserable existence.

He is a Christian, not Orthodox, but with a basic Protestant belief system limited by the place and circumstances of his upbringing. I wouldn't say he's given up yet but perhaps he may be close the last time I was there he mentioned several time that since coming in he's gotten worse, not better and the last time mentioned that if something doesn't change one day they're going to come in and find him dead. Recently, I'm becoming inclined to believe that may be possible, so as I'm writing this it's done with a heavy heart.

I will be talking to my Priest about what actions other than prayer I can take but prayer I have been doing and will continue to do. I thank you for your prayers on his behalf.

Your brother,

Innocent (Bob)
« Last Edit: March 13, 2015, 08:53:12 PM by Maximum Bob »
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline Rhinosaur

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #1 on: March 13, 2015, 08:51:08 PM »
Lord have mercy.  I'll keep him and you in my prayers.

Offline Alxandra

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #2 on: March 13, 2015, 08:52:25 PM »
Lord have mercy , I will be praying for him.
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Offline Theophania

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #3 on: March 13, 2015, 08:58:56 PM »
Lord have mercy on your father
It's common knowledge that you secretly want to be born in early 17th century Russia.  As a serf or a royal, I know not.  Chances are serf.

Offline Maria

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #4 on: March 13, 2015, 09:05:48 PM »
Lord have mercy on your father, mother, and siblings.
The memory of God should be treasured in our hearts like the precious pearl mentioned in the Holy Gospel. Our life's goal should be to nurture and contemplate God always within, and never let it depart, for this steadfastness will drive demons away from us. - Paraphrased from St. Philotheus of Sinai
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Offline littlepilgrim64

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #5 on: March 13, 2015, 09:18:49 PM »
Lord, have mercy!

Offline xOrthodox4Christx

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #6 on: March 13, 2015, 09:48:30 PM »
Lord have mercy.
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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #7 on: March 13, 2015, 10:16:08 PM »
Kyrie Eleison.  O Lord have mercy on path is family of Thy servants and bring them health, happiness and unity in the fellowship of Thy Church.
Axios and many years to you, Fr. Trenham!

Offline marigold

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #8 on: March 13, 2015, 10:47:59 PM »
Lord, have mercy on Maximum Bob's father, and on all the family.

Offline LenInSebastopol

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #9 on: March 14, 2015, 09:50:12 AM »
Lord, have mercy on this family, all, that the healing You have for each one be to coming to know You better.
God is The Creator of All Free Beings

Offline mabsoota

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #10 on: March 14, 2015, 10:34:48 AM »
may God have mercy.
maybe reading the psalms to him will help (and you can quietly say the prayers that go in between them in the prayer book).

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #11 on: March 16, 2015, 01:08:54 AM »
Thank you all for your prayers.
My family and I went to visit with him Saturday.  My brother and his family were there too, as was my sister. Not her family at that point anyway.  He really perked up during that time.  I wish there was a way to capitalize on that more permanently. My siblings and I will be trying to set a meeting with my mother and some medical staff,  not sure who, sometime this week. We're going to try to see if there's some way to change the direction of things.
« Last Edit: March 16, 2015, 01:10:34 AM by Maximum Bob »
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline SolEX01

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #12 on: March 16, 2015, 03:12:04 PM »
Lord have mercy.

Offline Papist

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #13 on: March 16, 2015, 03:32:12 PM »
Lord, have mercy.
"For, by its immensity, the divine substance surpasses every form that our intellect reaches. Thus we are unable to apprehend it by knowing what it is. Yet we are able to have some knowledge of it by knowing what it is not." - St. Thomas Aquinas, Summa contra gentiles, I, 14.

Offline NanaDeborah

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #14 on: March 16, 2015, 03:55:32 PM »
Lord have mercy on you, your father, and your whole family.
Thy Bridal Chamber, I see adorned, O my Savior, and have no wedding garment that I may enter.  Enlighten the vesture of my soul, O Giver of Light, and save me.

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #15 on: March 16, 2015, 05:50:48 PM »
Lord have mercy.

Holy Apostles, pray for us.
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Offline eddybear

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #16 on: March 16, 2015, 06:50:16 PM »
Lord, have mercy.

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #17 on: March 16, 2015, 06:54:16 PM »
Lord Jesus have mercy.
Christ my God, set my heart on fire with love in You, that in its flame I may love You with all my heart, with all my mind, and with all my soul and with all my strength, and my neighbor as myself, so that by keeping Your commandments I may glorify You the Giver of every good and perfect gift. Amen.

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #18 on: March 16, 2015, 06:54:39 PM »
LORD have mercy!

Offline LizaSymonenko

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #19 on: March 16, 2015, 06:56:31 PM »

May the Lord ease your father's pain and grant him a complete recovery.

...and may the Lord grant you and your family strength to endure whatever lies ahead, so that you can do all that is best for your father.

Praying for you.

Lord, have mercy!
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Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #20 on: March 19, 2015, 01:00:50 AM »
Thank you all so much for your prayers.

My siblings and I met today with my mother and staff at the rehabilitation center where my father is at the moment. We discussed potential future care and the likelihood of his soon demise. He has some sort of infection and they will be treating that and adjusting his pain meds to see if that can bring about any improvements but my siblings and I anyway don't have a lot of hope at this point. The nursing staff while reluctant to come right out and give a prognosis at this point did allow that people in his shape usually don't recover. He did rally for a bit with all of us there as he did last Saturday when the grandchildren visited but I fear that such a rally is ultimately unsustainable. Our current goal is that our mother is going to have shoulder surgery and will go to the same facility to recover so they can be together and that they will then discharge together, one way or the other.

It was good spending that time together as a family unit again today, though it makes my tear up to think of it. I have been tasked with contacting local hospice services to see what they offer. I have also requested a get together with my Priest to get guidance from him for myself from an Orthodox perspective.

Thank you again.

Innocent (Bob)
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline vorgos

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #21 on: March 19, 2015, 01:27:36 AM »
Lord have mercy.
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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #22 on: March 19, 2015, 05:41:33 AM »
Lord, have mercy.
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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #23 on: March 19, 2015, 06:04:26 AM »
Lord have mercy! My heart goes out to you and yours.
Thy Bridal Chamber, I see adorned, O my Savior, and have no wedding garment that I may enter.  Enlighten the vesture of my soul, O Giver of Light, and save me.

Offline LenInSebastopol

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #24 on: March 19, 2015, 08:41:57 AM »
Lord, have mercy on this family.
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Offline Opus118

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #25 on: March 19, 2015, 10:56:10 AM »
Lord, have mercy.
If you cannot remember everything, instead of everything, I beg you, remember this without fail, that not to share our own wealth with the poor is theft from the poor and deprivation of their means of life; we do not possess our own wealth but theirs.  If we have this attitude, we will certainly offer our money; and by nourishing Christ in poverty here and laying up great profit hereafter, we will be able to attain the good things which are to come. - St. John Chrysostom

Offline Altar Server

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #26 on: March 19, 2015, 11:37:18 AM »
Lord have mercy!
All my hope I place in you, O Mother of God, keep me under your protection!

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #27 on: March 20, 2015, 07:49:32 PM »
Thanks for the continued prayers. 

My father is now back in the hospital.  He's in the ICU being treated for pneumonia and low blood pressure.

Lord, have mercy. 
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #28 on: March 20, 2015, 07:58:52 PM »
Lord have mercy
Christ my God, set my heart on fire with love in You, that in its flame I may love You with all my heart, with all my mind, and with all my soul and with all my strength, and my neighbor as myself, so that by keeping Your commandments I may glorify You the Giver of every good and perfect gift. Amen.

Offline biro

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #29 on: March 20, 2015, 08:03:41 PM »
Lord have mercy.

Most Holy Theotokos, pray for us.
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Offline Salpy

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #30 on: March 20, 2015, 09:08:29 PM »
Lord have mercy!

Offline IXOYE

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #31 on: March 20, 2015, 09:28:25 PM »
Lord, have mercy!

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #32 on: March 21, 2015, 01:00:39 PM »
Sitting at the hospital with my father. He's only partially there thought it was 1952. But given some of the unpleasant symptoms he's experienced over the last few days it's probably good if he doesn't remember them.

He's being referred to palliative care on Monday.  Weird, just two days ago I'd never even heard of palliative care.

Thanks again for your prayers.
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline LenInSebastopol

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #33 on: March 21, 2015, 01:14:22 PM »
Lord, have Mercy. Prepare Your Kingdom for this loved one and comfort those of us who await Your Glory.
God is The Creator of All Free Beings

Offline littlepilgrim64

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #34 on: March 21, 2015, 01:34:47 PM »
Continued prayers for your dad, you and your family at this time. 

I'm sure he is happy and it brings him comfort that you are there with him today. 

Offline biro

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #35 on: March 21, 2015, 07:10:36 PM »
Lord have mercy.
https://archiveofourown.org/users/Parakeetist/works Warning: stories have mature content.

"Some people only feel good when they are praising the Lord." - Coptic bishop

Mt. 21:31 Jesus said to them, “Assuredly, I say to you that tax collectors and harlots enter the kingdom of God before you."

"Our Lord will *never* stop loving us." - Fr. Michael P.

Offline eddybear

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #36 on: March 21, 2015, 07:53:52 PM »
Lord, have mercy.

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #37 on: March 21, 2015, 08:18:36 PM »
Lord have mercy.
To God Be the Glory!

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #38 on: March 22, 2015, 11:31:00 PM »
Continuing thanks to everyone for the prayers.

Got a call from my sister today. While she was spending time with my father and one of my brothers the kidney doctor stopped by and said the dialysis isn't doing any good and they're recommending stopping it. They would likely tell my mother this in a meeting tomorrow.  This would basically mean he would have two weeks left.  I don't disagree with the idea of doing that. But I do think it should be a decision that is pondered for a day or two before it's made.  Don't know really if anyone agrees with me.  Of course it's not my call. It's my parents.  I hope to make myself available for the conversation with the Dr's tomorrow. 

Sigh.  :(
Lord, have mercy.
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline LenInSebastopol

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #39 on: March 23, 2015, 12:01:20 AM »
Lord, grant Your peace and send our Comforter to this family granting to them Your Wisdom and Peace with the understanding and love that You best give.
God is The Creator of All Free Beings

Offline marigold

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #40 on: March 23, 2015, 08:15:42 AM »
Lord, have mercy.

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #41 on: March 23, 2015, 10:35:25 AM »
Lord have mercy.
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"Some people only feel good when they are praising the Lord." - Coptic bishop

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Offline eddybear

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #42 on: March 23, 2015, 01:23:01 PM »
Lord, have mercy.

Offline Opus118

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #43 on: March 24, 2015, 11:00:35 AM »
Lord, have mercy.
If you cannot remember everything, instead of everything, I beg you, remember this without fail, that not to share our own wealth with the poor is theft from the poor and deprivation of their means of life; we do not possess our own wealth but theirs.  If we have this attitude, we will certainly offer our money; and by nourishing Christ in poverty here and laying up great profit hereafter, we will be able to attain the good things which are to come. - St. John Chrysostom

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #44 on: March 24, 2015, 10:35:14 PM »
Once again my thanks for your prayers.

My father has made his choice. We met yesterday with the palliative care team and later the kidney doctor and the hospitalist. They believe the dialysis is causing as much risk as it was producing reward, but they agreed continuing was his decision and they would continue if he wanted to. Yesterday he wanted to think about it more, which is what I wanted for him and my mom to not be pushed into a decision but to have the time to  think.

His choice wasn't really between death and life it was between dying soon and dying even sooner. He chose the later, because it means that he will be able to go home and enjoy being home for a brief while, something that was much less likely the other way.  :'(

At this point he will go home as soon as arrangements for 24 hour care can be made probably tomorrow afternoon. This gives him about two weeks left we hope.  :'(  :'( :'(
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline biro

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #45 on: March 24, 2015, 10:36:33 PM »
Lord have mercy.

Most Holy Theotokos, pray for us.
https://archiveofourown.org/users/Parakeetist/works Warning: stories have mature content.

"Some people only feel good when they are praising the Lord." - Coptic bishop

Mt. 21:31 Jesus said to them, “Assuredly, I say to you that tax collectors and harlots enter the kingdom of God before you."

"Our Lord will *never* stop loving us." - Fr. Michael P.

Offline Opus118

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #46 on: March 24, 2015, 10:51:09 PM »
Lord, have mercy. Please bring comfort and care for Bob's father and please bring solace and strength to Bob's family.
If you cannot remember everything, instead of everything, I beg you, remember this without fail, that not to share our own wealth with the poor is theft from the poor and deprivation of their means of life; we do not possess our own wealth but theirs.  If we have this attitude, we will certainly offer our money; and by nourishing Christ in poverty here and laying up great profit hereafter, we will be able to attain the good things which are to come. - St. John Chrysostom

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #47 on: March 25, 2015, 10:15:27 AM »
Thank you,  biro,  Opus 118.
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline littlepilgrim64

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #48 on: March 25, 2015, 02:33:46 PM »
Lord, have mercy!!    :'(

 

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #49 on: March 25, 2015, 04:11:36 PM »
Thanks littlepilgrim64.
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline Chiere

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #50 on: March 25, 2015, 09:41:11 PM »
Lord have mercy!
To God Be the Glory!

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #51 on: March 27, 2015, 12:18:49 AM »
Thank you, Chiere.
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline LenInSebastopol

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #52 on: March 27, 2015, 07:38:07 AM »
Lord, have mercy, and grant all peace.
God is The Creator of All Free Beings

Offline eddybear

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #53 on: March 27, 2015, 09:20:36 AM »
Lord, have mercy.

Offline Carl Kraeff (Second Chance)

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #54 on: March 27, 2015, 10:10:01 AM »
Lord have mercy.

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #55 on: March 27, 2015, 12:00:59 PM »
Thank you Carl, Eddy, Len.
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Offline elephant

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #56 on: March 27, 2015, 12:09:09 PM »
Lord Have Mercy Lord Have Mercy Lord Have Mercy
Most Holy Theotokos Save Us
Saint Andrew Pray For us

Offline Maximum Bob

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Re: Please pray for my father - he's getting worse not better
« Reply #57 on: March 28, 2015, 01:42:25 PM »
Thanks,  elephant.
Psalm 37:23 The Lord guides a man safely in the way he should go.

Prov. 3: 5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.