Author Topic: When Men Are Raped  (Read 1668 times)

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Offline Mor Ephrem

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When Men Are Raped
« on: September 05, 2014, 02:06:55 AM »
Quote
Now the question is, in a climate when politicians and the media are finally paying attention to military and campus sexual assault, should these new findings alter our national conversation about rape? Stemple is a longtime feminist who fully understands that men have historically used sexual violence to subjugate women and that in most countries they still do. As she sees it, feminism has fought long and hard to fight rape myths—that if a woman gets raped it’s somehow her fault, that she welcomed it in some way. But the same conversation needs to happen for men. By portraying sexual violence against men as aberrant, we prevent justice and compound the shame. And the conversation about men doesn’t need to shut down the one about women. “Compassion,” she says, “is not a finite resource.”

http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2014/04/male_rape_in_america_a_new_study_reveals_that_men_are_sexually_assaulted.html?wpsrc=sh_all_dt_tw_top
Mor Ephrem is a nice guy.  Just say sorry and it will all be ok. Say I had things that were inside troubling me but I didn't know how to express appropriately. I will not behave that way again but I am seeking help.

Offline Quinault

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2014, 06:25:22 AM »
I am going to read that when my computer isn't about to die. Thanks for sharing the link.

Offline Santagranddad

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2014, 07:01:03 AM »
Sexual and physical violence against women is, thanks to courageous campaigners, is well known but still not taken seriously enough. Here in a disturbing case of the grooming and repeated sexual assault of vunerable young girls in Rotherham, South Yorkshire, the Inspectorate of Constabulary found S Yorks Police had an attitude toward the victims, of their being trash and any time spent investigating was targeted at disproving victims complaints. An Inquiry by an academic found there some 1400 victims, mostly female but included male children too.

The rape of men is still a largely hidden issue and victims may end up feeling isolated and unsupported. This needs to change and will only do so if we are prepared to talk about it, and not in the jokey and dismissive way violence against and rape of women was years ago, and tragically still is in some quarters.

Offline Cyrillic

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2014, 07:14:12 AM »
Sexual and physical violence against women is, thanks to courageous campaigners, is well known but still not taken seriously enough. Here in a disturbing case of the grooming and repeated sexual assault of vunerable young girls in Rotherham, South Yorkshire, the Inspectorate of Constabulary found S Yorks Police had an attitude toward the victims, of their being trash and any time spent investigating was targeted at disproving victims complaints. An Inquiry by an academic found there some 1400 victims, mostly female but included male children too.

Sexual and physical violence not being taken seriously, or the girls being considered trash, weren't the reasons the Rotherham rapes were allowed to continue. You left out the most important part of the story.
« Last Edit: September 05, 2014, 07:25:06 AM by Cyrillic »

Offline Santagranddad

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #4 on: September 05, 2014, 07:29:34 AM »
Sexual and physical violence against women is, thanks to courageous campaigners, is well known but still not taken seriously enough. Here in a disturbing case of the grooming and repeated sexual assault of vunerable young girls in Rotherham, South Yorkshire, the Inspectorate of Constabulary found S Yorks Police had an attitude toward the victims, of their being trash and any time spent investigating was targeted at disproving victims complaints. An Inquiry by an academic found there some 1400 victims, mostly female but included male children too.

Sexual and physical violence not being taken seriously, or the girls being considered trash, wasn't the reason the Rotherham rapes were allowed to continue. You left out the most important part of the story.

From a police perspective I think not, and I have the Inspectorate of Constabulary and the Inquiry report to thank for that. The youngsters were in the care of Rotherham Social Services and here another agenda played out. The victims were mainly white or mixed race, but did include some from the perpetrators community, the Pakistani heritage community. No one wanted in Social Services wanted to be accused of racism apparently, that and the victims only being 2.3 per cent of the department's work.

But to turn back on you, the thread is about MALE RAPE and not race. And that's were I wanted to retain the attention, not wander off on another track, sorry.
« Last Edit: September 05, 2014, 07:31:33 AM by Santagranddad »

Offline Cyrillic

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #5 on: September 05, 2014, 07:37:35 AM »
No one wanted in Social Services wanted to be accused of racism apparently

Too bad 1400 kids were raped and prostituted as a consequence.

Talking about rape culture....

But to turn back on you, the thread is about MALE RAPE and not race. And that's were I wanted to retain the attention, not wander off on another track, sorry.

Indeed, but the recent Rotherham case touched tangentially on the subject at hand.
« Last Edit: September 05, 2014, 07:38:04 AM by Cyrillic »

Offline Santagranddad

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #6 on: September 05, 2014, 07:50:22 AM »
No one wanted in Social Services wanted to be accused of racism apparently

Too bad 1400 kids were raped and prostituted as a consequence.

Talking about rape culture....

But to turn back on you, the thread is about MALE RAPE and not race. And that's were I wanted to retain the attention, not wander off on another track, sorry.

Indeed, but the recent Rotherham case touched tangentially on the subject at hand.

Tragically it touched on a whole vein of issues. But against some of those - which have rightly raised an immense public outcry - the issue of rapes of men and boys is far too often overlooked. Indeed you might think it a non-issue because of deafening silence on the subject. I welcomed this thread bringing the subject to the fore.

And the offenders very often regard themselves as heterosexual.

Offline yeshuaisiam

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #7 on: September 05, 2014, 10:48:19 PM »
I don't believe men can be raped where they receive gratification or "pleasure".   

The prison type of "rape" (basically) I understand, but many men would handle that differently.  There would be some that feel violated and back themselves in the corner.  Others would be ready to go medieval on the perpetrator(s) and do so. 
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Offline Mor Ephrem

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #8 on: September 06, 2014, 08:42:04 PM »
I don't believe men can be raped where they receive gratification or "pleasure". 

At least we know you can't be raped.   
Mor Ephrem is a nice guy.  Just say sorry and it will all be ok. Say I had things that were inside troubling me but I didn't know how to express appropriately. I will not behave that way again but I am seeking help.

Offline quietmorning

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #9 on: September 07, 2014, 08:52:05 AM »
I don't believe men can be raped where they receive gratification or "pleasure". 

This is a serious misnomer and calloused judgement for someone who has probably never been raped for BOTH a male or female human being.  Bodies can very easily betray due to the mechanics of the sexual organs.
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Offline Santagranddad

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #10 on: September 07, 2014, 09:46:18 AM »
I don't believe men can be raped where they receive gratification or "pleasure". 

This is a serious misnomer and calloused judgement for someone who has probably never been raped for BOTH a male or female human being.  Bodies can very easily betray due to the mechanics of the sexual organs.


Not believing the World is round is believed by some, but it doesn't make it so. Not believing men may be and have been raped, as have women, is a credible as believing the World is flat. If the respondent had been present in rape suites as I have, such a view would quickly be lost.

Offline sakura95

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #11 on: September 07, 2014, 09:58:02 AM »
I don't believe men can be raped where they receive gratification or "pleasure".   

This is totally different from what I got when sitting in during Law class. When I was sitting in at the time, the topic of the day was about rape and there was an actual case about a man suing a woman for rape which the lecturer brought up and is present in the textbook.

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Offline NicholasMyra

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #12 on: September 07, 2014, 11:09:49 AM »
The author used the word "conversation" three times in that paragraph alone.

Wat an awful way to talk about such a subject.
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Offline Quinault

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #13 on: September 07, 2014, 08:17:10 PM »
To be blunt: an orgasm is in many ways involuntary. Having an orgasm doesn't mean that you actually enjoyed or consented to the encounter.

Offline homedad76

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #14 on: September 08, 2014, 11:27:58 AM »
Male rape by women is more often done either by coercion or by stealth (while asleep or otherwise incapacitated). It is rarely an agressive act as it would be difficult due to the mechanics involved.  However it does not make it any less rape.  Also, to be blunt, one must be careful not to confuse orgasm with ejaculation.  While a minimal orgasm accompanies it is not the same thing as what happens when the act is voluntary.  If anyone has ever seen the movie "40 Days and 40 Nights" they have seen how a woman can rape a man.
« Last Edit: September 08, 2014, 11:29:24 AM by homedad76 »
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Offline Cyrillic

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #15 on: September 09, 2014, 04:48:11 AM »
Seven or so years ago, there was a guest speaker who talked about rape in class. When she touched on the subject of male rape and told that she had heard of a man who was raped by eight women all the boys laughed, and I said, more loudly than I should have, that I wouldn't at all mind being raped by eight women. Then she added, he was raped by eight women with a beer bottle. None of the boys laughed any more.
« Last Edit: September 09, 2014, 04:49:18 AM by Cyrillic »

Offline TheTrisagion

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #16 on: September 09, 2014, 09:56:23 AM »
I've clicked on this thread many times and each time, I squirm a little bit more.
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Offline jewish voice

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #17 on: September 20, 2014, 07:09:24 PM »
I don't believe men can be raped where they receive gratification or "pleasure".   

The prison type of "rape" (basically) I understand, but many men would handle that differently.  There would be some that feel violated and back themselves in the corner.  Others would be ready to go medieval on the perpetrator(s) and do so. 
I think your kinda saying it wrong but I get what you mean. I'm put it straight no way can an adult male be raped by a women cause you can't rape the willing. We're just happy she showed us her tiger side.  ;)

Offline dzheremi

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Re: When Men Are Raped
« Reply #18 on: September 20, 2014, 07:38:23 PM »
This thread is gross, and not from the topic, but from the replies. Sorry to be crude, but do people here really believe that if the man gets an erection, then it's not rape? That's lunacy. Rape is a matter of lack of consent, not physiology.

Really, some of this reminds me of that ignorant senator (I can't remember his name, but it doesn't matter; they're all ignorant) who got in the news a while ago for claiming that women can't get pregnant from rape because in cases of "legitimate rape" (his term), the body has a way of shutting the pregnancy down. So if a woman is pregnant as a result of the act, then it by definition is not rape (or not "legitimate rape", whatever the heck that means). This is just the flip side of that, and just as repulsive: If it was rape, why did the man get an erection? If it was legitimate rape, the body has a way of shutting that down... >:(

Without naming names, how many threads do you all think we have had about some of our teenaged (or maybe even not teenaged) board members having unwanted sexual thoughts during church and, erm...physiological manifestations of them? You think they all wanted that? I kinda doubt it, or else why would anyone start a thread about such things on this forum and feel embarrassed in that way? Use your brains, people, before you respond like you're at a stereotypical 1950s stag party or locker room or something. This is a serious issue and should be taken seriously, not as an excuse to virtually nudge one another and say (essentially) "heh heh heh I don't know...sounds nice to me!"