I wish I could just take a break from this Orthodoxy and live with no rules for at least a couple days; that'd be nice. It's unfair that the cradles can break all the rules and sin, but we converts are expected to be perfect.
Why can't you take a break? Plenty of Orthodox, cradle and convert, do so, living with no rules for longer than one or two days (whether or not it's "nice"). Does your priest follow you around with a bamboo cane and beat you when you start breaking rules?
Well he emails me whenever I miss Church
And my priest sends me text messages saying "We haven't seen you in a long time. We hope you will be with us again soon." He knows that i, like you, have non-Orthodox family and sometimes I need to leave the state to go visit them (like around Western Christmas/now). Are you sure you're not reading something into his concern that is more judgmental than he may mean it? Perhaps there are communication problems due to differing backgrounds, e.g., him not being an American teenager?
I think it's good to give priests, and everybody, the benefit of the doubt whenever possible.
I mean...no priest or parishioner is perfect, but I have always assumed that abouna leaves the judgment for when I get back
, and I have yet to be proven wrong.