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Author Topic: Schlock Orthoproducts  (Read 6044 times) Average Rating: 3
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LizaSymonenko
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« Reply #180 on: December 18, 2013, 12:11:49 PM »


Yes...it was extinguished in proper manner for a "cyber" icon.  Wink

Really, I think if you are going to take icons seriously, I don't understand how having them on your computer screen or phone makes any more sense than wearing them on a bracelet, t-shirt, etc.

And yes, everyone with your analogies I think the same about photos of anyone. It's ridiculous to me to see people who have their kid as their computer wallpaper or whatever. It's vulgar in my estimation.

Now posting an icon for didactic reasons like LBK might do makes sense in terms of economy, though its still a bit weird. Just like showing someone a photo of yourself before meeting them might make sense. 

Liza, don't think I am judging you or something, I can't imagine a person whose heart is more in the right place than yours, except for maybe Opus. I am speaking in generalities.

I totally understand where you are coming from, Orthonorm....and respect your opinion, as it is truly valid.

However, what I have on my phone isn't really an "icon" per se.  I wish I could add it as an attachment....but, the Forum drive is full...and no attachment can be added.

What I have is a photo that I took of my church during Vespers...it does have an icon in it, but, it's not solely the icon.


My computer desktop also has an image from my church.  As it's nearing Nativity, I have an image from last year's Nativity.  Why, you ask.

Well....instead of putting up a Santa Claus or poinsettia or something....I find that the image helps put me in the Christmas spirit.

It also serves as a starting point for numerous conversations with coworkers who notice the desktop and comment on it....opening the door for added conversation.   Just like hanging an Orthodox calendar would.

Just yesterday, I was in my boss's office.  It was my year end review.  It went faster than expected and with 15 minutes to spare, he asked me if I had any plans for the holidays.  He knows I am Orthodox, but, I don't think he knows much about Orthodoxy.  I reminded him that I don't celebrate until January 7th...which led to the whole "why the difference in dates" conversation, Julian versus Gregorian calendars, date of Easter/Pascha...and differences between RC and Orthodox.

While I hesitated in going in to too much of the differences between the Churches I did give a few....it sparked his interest and he said he would have to do some reading on the subject.

So, you never know.  We shouldn't hide our "Light" under a bushel, but, advertise it from the highest mountain top....however, in doing so, we should never forget the true value of that Light, it's source, and the respect that it is due.
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« Reply #181 on: December 18, 2013, 12:16:30 PM »

I found it on my Facebook.

This is the image I have the home-screen of my phone.  It's centered and the top and bottom are all black.


..and this is my computer desktop.


...and since I use two monitors at work...the one most visible to others will often not have anything but this image displayed on it.
« Last Edit: December 18, 2013, 12:17:59 PM by LizaSymonenko » Logged

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« Reply #182 on: December 23, 2013, 05:56:26 PM »

Again, Serbia.
Now, what we can buy in IKEA in Serbia...
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« Reply #183 on: December 23, 2013, 05:58:13 PM »

Still not as cool as incense from Carrefour.
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« Reply #184 on: December 23, 2013, 07:34:40 PM »

For our Coptic friends:



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« Reply #185 on: December 23, 2013, 07:35:25 PM »

Again, Serbia.
Now, what we can buy in IKEA in Serbia...

In IKEA? Owns.
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« Reply #186 on: December 23, 2013, 07:37:56 PM »

And now the Chalcedonian version, from Holy Russia:



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« Reply #187 on: December 24, 2013, 12:11:48 AM »

And now the Chalcedonian version, from Holy Russia:





The gold watch for retired bishops.
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« Reply #188 on: January 09, 2014, 01:41:37 PM »

A pretty decent commentary on how people treat holy things, actually:

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« Reply #189 on: January 09, 2014, 01:44:24 PM »

Doesn't the Stalin calendar take the prize and end the thread? http://www.rferl.org/content/russia-stalin-calendar/25224022.html

How much worse could you get?
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« Reply #190 on: January 09, 2014, 02:59:32 PM »

Doesn't the Stalin calendar take the prize and end the thread? http://www.rferl.org/content/russia-stalin-calendar/25224022.html

How much worse could you get?
If we're going the calendar route, there's always the gay priest calendar. (NOTE: No actual exposure in the link, but one censored NSFW pic contained in the story.)
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« Reply #191 on: January 09, 2014, 03:25:20 PM »

Doesn't the Stalin calendar take the prize and end the thread? http://www.rferl.org/content/russia-stalin-calendar/25224022.html

How much worse could you get?

Never ask that question.
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« Reply #192 on: January 09, 2014, 03:52:38 PM »

Doesn't the Stalin calendar take the prize and end the thread? http://www.rferl.org/content/russia-stalin-calendar/25224022.html

How much worse could you get?
If we're going the calendar route, there's always the gay priest calendar. (NOTE: No actual exposure in the link, but one censored NSFW pic contained in the story.)

That one has no connection to the real Church though, the Stalin calendar does.
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« Reply #193 on: January 09, 2014, 03:54:30 PM »

Doesn't the Stalin calendar take the prize and end the thread? http://www.rferl.org/content/russia-stalin-calendar/25224022.html

How much worse could you get?

Never ask that question.

H.L. Mencken's pithy observation that one would never go broke by underestimating the taste of the American public is probably equally apropos to many of the Orthodox faithful, so I suppose you are correct.   Wink
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« Reply #194 on: January 09, 2014, 05:00:24 PM »

Have not decited yet schlock or not:



I think this would be a great gift for my mother. She has this old magnetic nativity scene where in the Magi and some shepherds are on this track. Each figure moves around the track and when they pass in front of the Holy Family they make a little turn. It was nice when she bought the thing, but now it is falling apart.

::Edit:: yes I realize this thing is huge, but if you knew my mother you would know that this fits nicely with her plethora of religious imagery.
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« Reply #195 on: January 12, 2014, 10:26:48 PM »

I think this would be a great gift for my mother. She has this old magnetic nativity scene where in the Magi and some shepherds are on this track. Each figure moves around the track and when they pass in front of the Holy Family they make a little turn.

dcommini,

I'd love to see a photo of that set. Any chance?

Many years,

Neil
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« Reply #196 on: January 12, 2014, 11:47:39 PM »

Have not decited yet schlock or not:



I think this would be a great gift for my mother. She has this old magnetic nativity scene where in the Magi and some shepherds are on this track. Each figure moves around the track and when they pass in front of the Holy Family they make a little turn. It was nice when she bought the thing, but now it is falling apart.

::Edit:: yes I realize this thing is huge, but if you knew my mother you would know that this fits nicely with her plethora of religious imagery.

Heh. I had almost completely forgotten about that set. She still has it? I don't recall seeing it out Christmas of 2003, which I believe is the last time I was actually at her house for Christmas (note to others: This does not mean I haven't visited my mom for Christmas since 2003- she has a tendency to travel during Christmas, the odds of actually being at her house during a Christmas vacation are about 20-1; we're more likely to catch her at our grandparents or her in-laws or stepchildrens' or our houses. As a child I often wondered why we bothered decorating for Christmas at all as I can count the number of times we celebrated Christmas at the house on one hand.  laugh ).
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« Reply #197 on: January 14, 2014, 11:31:25 AM »

I think this would be a great gift for my mother. She has this old magnetic nativity scene where in the Magi and some shepherds are on this track. Each figure moves around the track and when they pass in front of the Holy Family they make a little turn.

dcommini,

I'd love to see a photo of that set. Any chance?

Many years,

Neil

If it hasn't completely fallen apart yet then I will take a picture and upload it when I go up to Indiana in a few days.



Heh. I had almost completely forgotten about that set. She still has it? I don't recall seeing it out Christmas of 2003, which I believe is the last time I was actually at her house for Christmas (note to others: This does not mean I haven't visited my mom for Christmas since 2003- she has a tendency to travel during Christmas, the odds of actually being at her house during a Christmas vacation are about 20-1; we're more likely to catch her at our grandparents or her in-laws or stepchildrens' or our houses. As a child I often wondered why we bothered decorating for Christmas at all as I can count the number of times we celebrated Christmas at the house on one hand.  laugh ).

Yes, she still has that set (or at least she did a few months ago). She usually leaves it out year round now, hence the reason it is falling apart. Have you really not been to any of her houses (for Christmas) since 2003? I'm pretty sure she had the thing out when we lived in Columbia, it fits so nicely with all the other religious paraphernalia that it may just blend in so nicely and be hard to notice unless you're looking for it.
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« Reply #198 on: January 27, 2014, 10:02:23 AM »

I've just found it. Russians...

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« Reply #199 on: January 27, 2014, 02:05:06 PM »

It's almost too cute to be schlock.  laugh

Oh? Then how about these:




 Cheesy Those are so cute!
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« Reply #200 on: January 27, 2014, 02:14:51 PM »

I've just found it. Russians...



For the kind of veneration that involves hours long, open-mouthed drooling.
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« Reply #201 on: February 02, 2014, 04:26:15 PM »

Awesome. I know * likes to level everything down to some ridiculous common denominator which he believes conditions the view he is taking a stance against.

That he is almost always wrong is beside the point. He is clever when he does it, but nevertheless usually inaccurate.

Any idea how I could switch it around so I am boringly accurate? That seems preferable...
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« Reply #202 on: February 02, 2014, 05:18:18 PM »

It's almost too cute to be schlock.  laugh

Oh? Then how about these:




 Cheesy Those are so cute!

Those actually look like nice little ornaments. They would go well on a Christmas tree. Smiley
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« Reply #203 on: February 16, 2014, 10:05:58 PM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.

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« Reply #204 on: February 16, 2014, 10:26:20 PM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



Wow, talk about a double whammy of schlockodoxy. Stepping on Christ, and an uncanonical "icon" of him to boot!  Shocked
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« Reply #205 on: February 16, 2014, 10:28:44 PM »

Brings new (bad) meaning to the rather cheesy Footprints in the Sand poem.


*where is the shudder emoticon when you need it*

 Huh
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« Reply #206 on: February 16, 2014, 10:32:57 PM »

Brings new (bad) meaning to the rather cheesy Footprints in the Sand poem.

Brilliant. Just brilliant.  Kiss Kiss Kiss
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« Reply #207 on: February 16, 2014, 10:39:44 PM »


Wow, talk about a double whammy of schlockodoxy. Stepping on Christ, and an uncanonical "icon" of him to boot!  Shocked
Knew you would appreciate.
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« Reply #208 on: February 16, 2014, 10:41:16 PM »

While not produced by an "Orthodox" source, these caught my eye:



The spiel:

"My soles magnify the Lord." That's what you'll be saying as you slip into a pair of righteous Shoes of the Fisherman flip-flops.

These sandals leave their unique message "in the sand at the seashore, on sidewalks after a rain shower, and on wet pool decks." And "while the words disappear as the sands shift and the sidewalk dries, these footprints leave the greatest impression on the soul." Amen.

Hand-finished in Thailand, Shoes of the Fisherman flip-flops are blue and white with a contoured insole, and are "waffled to keep feet cool." Take your first steps into a new world of witnessing for just $XXXX (plus postage and packing).


It is to laugh. Or cry.
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« Reply #209 on: February 16, 2014, 10:51:29 PM »

wow!
perfect topic
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« Reply #210 on: February 17, 2014, 12:19:33 AM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



Wow, talk about a double whammy of schlockodoxy. Stepping on Christ, and an uncanonical "icon" of him to boot!  Shocked
Or maybe they are for really pious Orthodox, so they can step on heretical schlock wherever they go. Wink
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« Reply #211 on: February 17, 2014, 12:26:16 AM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



Wow, talk about a double whammy of schlockodoxy. Stepping on Christ, and an uncanonical "icon" of him to boot!  Shocked
Or maybe they are for really pious Orthodox, so they can step on heretical schlock wherever they go. Wink

I'm surprised it took so long for someone to say it.  Wink

At any rate, I'd never wear them. Or any flip-flops, for that matter. They keep falling off my feet.
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« Reply #212 on: February 17, 2014, 12:28:18 AM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



Wow, talk about a double whammy of schlockodoxy. Stepping on Christ, and an uncanonical "icon" of him to boot!  Shocked
Or maybe they are for really pious Orthodox, so they can step on heretical schlock wherever they go. Wink

I'm surprised it took so long for someone to say it.  Wink

At any rate, I'd never wear them. Or any flip-flops, for that matter. They keep falling off my feet.


And the fact that Jesus is one-eyed....isn't a selling point either.....
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« Reply #213 on: February 17, 2014, 02:35:44 AM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



It took at least 8 seconds for that to register.

Fantastic. I hope you provided the Scriptural ad copy.
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« Reply #214 on: February 17, 2014, 02:37:01 AM »

While not produced by an "Orthodox" source, these caught my eye:



The spiel:

"My soles magnify the Lord." That's what you'll be saying as you slip into a pair of righteous Shoes of the Fisherman flip-flops.

These sandals leave their unique message "in the sand at the seashore, on sidewalks after a rain shower, and on wet pool decks." And "while the words disappear as the sands shift and the sidewalk dries, these footprints leave the greatest impression on the soul." Amen.

Hand-finished in Thailand, Shoes of the Fisherman flip-flops are blue and white with a contoured insole, and are "waffled to keep feet cool." Take your first steps into a new world of witnessing for just $XXXX (plus postage and packing).


It is to laugh. Or cry.

I don't believe it has to be an either or world.

LOL!
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« Reply #215 on: February 17, 2014, 02:38:24 AM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



Wow, talk about a double whammy of schlockodoxy. Stepping on Christ, and an uncanonical "icon" of him to boot!  Shocked
Or maybe they are for really pious Orthodox, so they can step on heretical schlock wherever they go. Wink

I'm surprised it took so long for someone to say it.  Wink

At any rate, I'd never wear them. Or any flip-flops, for that matter. They keep falling off my feet.


And the fact that Jesus is one-eyed....isn't a selling point either.....

Three out of four Gospels can't be wrong.
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« Reply #216 on: February 21, 2014, 03:14:54 PM »

A variation on a previous theme and a couple of head scratchers.







Lastly, just in time for Mardi Gras season?


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« Reply #217 on: February 21, 2014, 03:19:56 PM »



From a site where bots just seem to fill in generic shirts with phrases meant to be marketed to different audiences. Pages of hilarity ensue.

« Last Edit: February 21, 2014, 03:22:20 PM by Agabus » Logged

Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

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LBK
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Holy Father Patrick, pray for us!


« Reply #218 on: March 06, 2014, 12:18:29 AM »

Looking for that special something to impress your guests at your child's baptism? Let us at (name of firm deleted) bake you these yummy baptismal cookies!



Guaranteed to leave a bad taste in your mouth!
« Last Edit: March 06, 2014, 12:35:49 AM by LBK » Logged
Agabus
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« Reply #219 on: March 06, 2014, 11:28:29 AM »

Looking for that special something to impress your guests at your child's baptism? Let us at (name of firm deleted) bake you these yummy baptismal cookies!



Guaranteed to leave a bad taste in your mouth!
Sweet in the mouth but sour in the belly!
« Last Edit: March 06, 2014, 11:28:44 AM by Agabus » Logged

Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

THE OPINIONS HERE MAY NOT REFLECT THE ACTUAL OR PERCEIVED ORTHODOX CHURCH
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« Reply #220 on: March 06, 2014, 11:43:38 AM »

Classic schlock.

I wasn't able to find my favorite, which replaces the pupil in the evil eye with a medallion of the Theotokos.






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Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

THE OPINIONS HERE MAY NOT REFLECT THE ACTUAL OR PERCEIVED ORTHODOX CHURCH
LizaSymonenko
Слава Ісусу Христу!!! Glory to Jesus Christ!!!
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WWW
« Reply #221 on: March 06, 2014, 04:03:34 PM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



I wonder just who would actually buy and wear these.

Just, wow.
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Holy Trinity Church of Gergeti, Georgia


« Reply #222 on: March 07, 2014, 12:00:32 AM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



Wow, talk about a double whammy of schlockodoxy. Stepping on Christ, and an uncanonical "icon" of him to boot!  Shocked

Do you wear them, venerate them, or burn them?
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« Reply #223 on: March 07, 2014, 12:13:47 AM »

He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.



Wow, talk about a double whammy of schlockodoxy. Stepping on Christ, and an uncanonical "icon" of him to boot!  Shocked

Do you wear them, venerate them, or burn them?


A and C


In theory simultaneously, for best effect.
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Justin Kolodziej
Party per fess argent and gules; in chief a Latin cross bottony sable between two lozenges azure; in base a wheel, or.
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« Reply #224 on: March 10, 2014, 09:25:26 PM »

I am the sorry owner of one of these:  Roll Eyes



(it was a birthday gift)
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Where even the last two or three are gathered in His name, He is there in their midst.
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