Dear brothers & sisters in Christ:
Please send up prayers for me, as I struggle to reconcile my sexual orientation and its implications with the teachings and discipline of the Church.
Most of all, that I not turn my back on the Lord or the Church, as I attempt to gain clarity along with self-acceptance, in God's light. For I know that 'Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked.' (Ps. 84:10)
God bless and have mercy on you, Symeon!
You seem to understand the Church's teaching on this issue, so, that being understood, remember that Christ already accepts you and loves you. It is a particular cross to bear, and for doing so in an Orthodox manner, I'm certain that much reward is given to those faithful Christians.
I remember a story recounted by Fr. Thomas Hopko, who once met a rather confrontational agnostic/atheist at a round table he was at. The gentleman had been in the crowd. Afterwards, he sought out Fr. Hopko, wanting to meet with him for an extended amount of time. Father told him where his office was and when to come by.
The man showed up and asked more and more about Orthodoxy. He determined that he wanted to seriously inquire with intent to convert, and Fr Hopko began speaking to him about the process. The man stopped him and said, "Father, you have to know first, that I'm gay."
Fr. Hopko ignored this and kept going, so the man stated it again. This time, Father said, "Yes, yes, I heard you...we can talk about that later, but this stuff first..."
The man stood up and turned as if to leave, but only stood at the door. Fr. Tom went over to him to find him tearing up, so he asked him what was wrong. He proceeded to tell him that all the churches he went to either rejected him out of hand or didn't see his orientation as any kind of issue. He knew both were wrong. He had wanted to be a Christian for so long, but didn't know there was a Church out there that would accept him the way Orthodoxy does.