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Author Topic: Since becoming Orthodox, I've been solitary and isolated  (Read 2579 times) Average Rating: 0
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WPM
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« on: February 11, 2013, 02:18:45 PM »

Hello, since becoming Orthodox I've been solitary and isolated. Anybody know why?..
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« Reply #1 on: February 11, 2013, 02:20:10 PM »

Forgive me, but wouldn't you be better able to answer that than anonymous folks on the internet who don't know you or your circumstances?
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« Reply #2 on: February 11, 2013, 02:25:14 PM »

Forgive me, but wouldn't you be better able to answer that than anonymous folks on the internet who don't know you or your circumstances?

No, they just haven't done a very good job of telling me whats going on.
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« Reply #3 on: February 11, 2013, 02:36:10 PM »

Hello, since becoming Orthodox I've been solitary and isolated. Anybody know why?..

When you decide to wage war on the World, do not be too shocked when you become an enemy of the World.  And watch your back particularly close when around those that claim to be on the same side as you.  Keep in mind that it is Christ that you serve, and nothing else matters.  You don't become truly Orthodox with the expectation of winning popularity contests.  Most importantly, keep in mind that you are NEVER alone.  You are surrounded by a cloud of witnesses.
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« Reply #4 on: February 11, 2013, 02:47:28 PM »

Hello, since becoming Orthodox I've been solitary and isolated. Anybody know why?..

Sometimes, when we find ourselves "alone" is when we are able to do the most work.

Cherish the time, get some work done, do some reading, grow spiritually, etc....because it won't last....and when you find yourself overwhelmed with "friends", emails, phone calls, etc....you'll crave a moment of "aloneness".
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« Reply #5 on: February 11, 2013, 02:47:44 PM »

Are you supposed to socialize with people at church? coffee hour etc.
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« Reply #6 on: February 11, 2013, 02:50:21 PM »


Absolutely!  Why wouldn't you?  You can find some of your dearest friends at coffee hour.
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« Reply #7 on: February 11, 2013, 03:05:37 PM »

Are you supposed to socialize with people at church? coffee hour etc.

Why not?  Particularly if you are lonely. 
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« Reply #8 on: February 11, 2013, 03:32:37 PM »

Hello, since becoming Orthodox I've been solitary and isolated. Anybody know why?..

Sometimes, when we find ourselves "alone" is when we are able to do the most work.

Cherish the time, get some work done, do some reading, grow spiritually, etc....because it won't last....and when you find yourself overwhelmed with "friends", emails, phone calls, etc....you'll crave a moment of "aloneness".


So what you're saying is you'd rather seek to be alone and secluded from the rest of the world ... that's what a monastery is for.
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« Reply #9 on: February 11, 2013, 03:33:54 PM »

Become Parish Council President - you won't have many friends, it's true. But you'll never be lonely. In fact, you won't have a moment's peace.
 Wink
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« Reply #10 on: February 11, 2013, 04:04:55 PM »


Ugh!  That is one thankless position! 

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« Reply #11 on: February 11, 2013, 05:11:03 PM »


Ugh!  That is one thankless position! 



Tell me about it! Grin
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« Reply #12 on: February 11, 2013, 05:55:21 PM »

Are you supposed to socialize with people at church? coffee hour etc.

I don't see why not; I do, because I'm still clinging onto the hope that someone will have a marriagable Orthodox female niece or grand-daughter from the old country or something that they could hook me up with. As long as the people at your Church are not promoting wicked behavior, then I don't see why you shouldn't socialize with them.
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« Reply #13 on: February 11, 2013, 07:41:58 PM »

Do you actually attend Church? Liturgy? Vespers? Etc.? Smiley
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« Reply #14 on: February 11, 2013, 09:24:38 PM »

Is this correct? How you treat other people manifests your character? ...
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« Reply #15 on: February 11, 2013, 09:31:05 PM »

Is this correct? How you treat other people manifests your character? ...

How you treat people? Perhaps. But people are generally very poor interpreters of other people, so saying "He treated me like X, therefore..." is usually flawed in some way. Put simply, we aren't too bright when judging other people. But God is pretty good, methinks...
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« Reply #16 on: February 11, 2013, 09:51:01 PM »

Do you actually attend Church? Liturgy? Vespers? Etc.? Smiley

Theoretically, I could be at church all the time. (I don't think anyone is keeping roll call)
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« Reply #17 on: February 11, 2013, 09:52:54 PM »

Do you actually attend Church? Liturgy? Vespers? Etc.? Smiley

Theoretically, I could be at church all the time. (I don't think anyone is keeping roll call)

I ask because I seemed to recall that you were the person who didn't want to drive an hour to services, and so weren't attending, and that's why I asked. So, if you are that person, and if I understand your current situation correctly: you don't go to church, and want to know why you are isolated, and not around other Christians? Is that correct?
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« Reply #18 on: February 11, 2013, 10:19:29 PM »

Do you actually attend Church? Liturgy? Vespers? Etc.? Smiley

Theoretically, I could be at church all the time. (I don't think anyone is keeping roll call)

I ask because I seemed to recall that you were the person who didn't want to drive an hour to services, and so weren't attending, and that's why I asked. So, if you are that person, and if I understand your current situation correctly: you don't go to church, and want to know why you are isolated, and not around other Christians? Is that correct?

Yes.
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« Reply #19 on: February 11, 2013, 10:30:55 PM »

It actually feels like being cut off from social interaction.
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« Reply #20 on: February 11, 2013, 11:02:09 PM »

It actually feels like being cut off from social interaction.

Perhaps this is one of the reasons that Hebrews says: "Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching." (Heb. 10:25)  Maybe it's time now to return to church and go to services, and interact with people afterwards?
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« Reply #21 on: February 11, 2013, 11:14:18 PM »

Oh, ok.
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« Reply #22 on: February 11, 2013, 11:23:55 PM »

So ... why are people saying "Ugh"..? is it a expression of complaint and disgust?..
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« Reply #23 on: February 12, 2013, 12:36:18 AM »

It actually feels like being cut off from social interaction.

Perhaps this is one of the reasons that Hebrews says: "Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching." (Heb. 10:25)  Maybe it's time now to return to church and go to services, and interact with people afterwards?

People on T.V. don't count.
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« Reply #24 on: February 12, 2013, 01:15:00 AM »

It actually feels like being cut off from social interaction.

Perhaps this is one of the reasons that Hebrews says: "Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching." (Heb. 10:25)  Maybe it's time now to return to church and go to services, and interact with people afterwards?

People on T.V. don't count.

What?
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« Reply #25 on: February 12, 2013, 01:23:24 AM »

strangest thread ever!
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« Reply #26 on: February 12, 2013, 02:31:06 AM »

I used to listen to the Divine Liturgy over terrestrial and Internet radio.  Most Greeks with Satellite TV watch services live from Greece.  Doesn't substitute for real Church attendance (or putting money in the collection plate - can't do that over Satellite).   angel 
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« Reply #27 on: February 12, 2013, 05:37:09 AM »

Wesley,

It would be a very good idea for you to email Fr Basil at St Barbara and ask him if he can arrange for someone to pick you up on Sunday mornings. If you can work that out, it will do you a lot of good. Also, when you email him don't forget to ask him when you can have confession with him. That will help you a lot as well, even if it's just a simple confession.

For everyone else, just be very patient with our friend.
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« Reply #28 on: February 12, 2013, 06:23:56 AM »

Hello, since becoming Orthodox I've been solitary and isolated. Anybody know why?..

When you decide to wage war on the World, do not be too shocked when you become an enemy of the World.  And watch your back particularly close when around those that claim to be on the same side as you.  Keep in mind that it is Christ that you serve, and nothing else matters.  You don't become truly Orthodox with the expectation of winning popularity contests.  Most importantly, keep in mind that you are NEVER alone.  You are surrounded by a cloud of witnesses.

To add onto this, when you wage war against the world, you lose interest in the things it has to offer.  Keeping in mind most of what the world does has to offer is sinful and distracts one from seeking Gods path for them, there isn’t much left.  Just be sure you do not push away those who are seeking the same thing you are seeking and would be able to gain strength from one another.
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« Reply #29 on: February 12, 2013, 07:39:32 AM »

Never had that kind of problem. My friends are still mostly non-Orthodox regardless of whether they are religious or not.
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« Reply #30 on: February 12, 2013, 09:59:40 AM »

How are you supposed to enact a conversation with a guy on the street? ...
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« Reply #31 on: February 12, 2013, 10:02:48 AM »

strangest thread ever!

My thoughts from reading every second thread for about a month.
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« Reply #32 on: February 12, 2013, 10:03:39 AM »

Wesley,

It would be a very good idea for you to email Fr Basil at St Barbara and ask him if he can arrange for someone to pick you up on Sunday mornings. If you can work that out, it will do you a lot of good. Also, when you email him don't forget to ask him when you can have confession with him. That will help you a lot as well, even if it's just a simple confession.

For everyone else, just be very patient with our friend.

Thank you for being so kind! ... It doesn't make sense to drive all that way to Cityview just for Orthodox services. (You have to get an apartment in the area)
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« Reply #33 on: February 12, 2013, 03:51:06 PM »

Are you supposed to socialize with people at church? coffee hour etc.
If able, I would say yes.
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« Reply #34 on: February 13, 2013, 10:06:28 AM »

suffering seems to be part of Christianity.  Whether it be the enemy at the gates with weapons or the boss that persecutes you for celebrating Christmas on the "wrong day." Don't worry so much you are never alone you have the Father, Son and Holy Spirit with you. 
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« Reply #35 on: February 14, 2013, 07:24:17 AM »

WPM-

No offense intended to you, but you almost seem to be talking in puzzles and expecting people to fish for clues.  Perhaps you have other information about yourself in other threads that I haven't seen that would yield more information.  This has been a very  difficult thread to follow. I would suggest you talk in a little ore detail and maybe indicate what it is you really are seeking.  Is it a closer walk with God? friendship? Be accepted in your church?  I do know that as with most things in life if you want people to acknowledge you, you will also have to make an effort to be available, to extend a friendly gesture and so forth yourself.  If you merely come to church, sit at the back and quickly sneak out, you are not providing opportunities for people to get to know you.  If I saw this I would assume that is what you want, and would try to respect your desire for that kind of a life.
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« Reply #36 on: February 14, 2013, 11:54:20 AM »

If I saw this I would assume that is what you want, and would try to respect your desire for that kind of a life.

I am a shy person myself, and I never know whether to approach people or not. I would assume the same thing and leave that person alone.
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« Reply #37 on: February 18, 2013, 12:14:34 AM »

To reference Shrek, our friend WPM is like an onion - he has layers. It's best to simply reply with patience and kindness and not make too many assumptions about him. There is more than meets the eye.
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« Reply #38 on: February 18, 2013, 05:20:14 PM »

WPM-

No offense intended to you, but you almost seem to be talking in puzzles and expecting people to fish for clues.  Perhaps you have other information about yourself in other threads that I haven't seen that would yield more information.  This has been a very  difficult thread to follow. I would suggest you talk in a little ore detail and maybe indicate what it is you really are seeking.  Is it a closer walk with God? friendship? Be accepted in your church?  I do know that as with most things in life if you want people to acknowledge you, you will also have to make an effort to be available, to extend a friendly gesture and so forth yourself.  If you merely come to church, sit at the back and quickly sneak out, you are not providing opportunities for people to get to know you.  If I saw this I would assume that is what you want, and would try to respect your desire for that kind of a life.

 Huh I've been making an effort to introduce myself and get to know people in the area.
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« Reply #39 on: February 18, 2013, 05:29:59 PM »

WPM-

No offense intended to you, but you almost seem to be talking in puzzles and expecting people to fish for clues.  Perhaps you have other information about yourself in other threads that I haven't seen that would yield more information.  This has been a very  difficult thread to follow. I would suggest you talk in a little ore detail and maybe indicate what it is you really are seeking.  Is it a closer walk with God? friendship? Be accepted in your church?  I do know that as with most things in life if you want people to acknowledge you, you will also have to make an effort to be available, to extend a friendly gesture and so forth yourself.  If you merely come to church, sit at the back and quickly sneak out, you are not providing opportunities for people to get to know you.  If I saw this I would assume that is what you want, and would try to respect your desire for that kind of a life.

 Huh I've been making an effort to introduce myself and get to know people in the area.

Wesley,

I am praying for you.
Does someone in your parish live near you?
Is your priest going to come and bless your house before Great Lent?
After all, it is the tradition to bless all homes in the parish starting with the feast of the Epiphany.
That would be a great opportunity for your family to meet your priest.
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« Reply #40 on: February 18, 2013, 06:15:44 PM »

I am praying for you.
Does someone in your parish live near you?
Is your priest going to come and bless your house before Great Lent?
After all, it is the tradition to bless all homes in the parish starting with the feast of the Epiphany.
That would be a great opportunity for your family to meet your priest.

Hi, I think there is a local catholic priest. The Orthodox ones mean you have to drive/travel to the Ft. Worth area to speak with them.

... (I don't think there is anybody in the area that attends Worship Service)..
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« Reply #41 on: February 18, 2013, 09:17:47 PM »

I don't know the size of your parish or how familiar you are with your area.  Having moved several times, I know it can be difficult with some communities to break in to established friendships and family circles. Sometimes you just have to be patient and let things happen at their own pace.
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« Reply #42 on: February 18, 2013, 09:19:42 PM »

Yeah, we used to drive about 50 minutes to an Orthodox Church. It was definitely a grind. But what are you gonna do?
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« Reply #43 on: February 18, 2013, 09:21:25 PM »

45 minutes for me
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« Reply #44 on: February 18, 2013, 09:54:40 PM »

In your other thread didn't you say you've never been to an Orthodox church yet? How can you be Orthodox then...
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