Your decision about what Church to join should be based on the Truth of the Church, along with a call from Christ - not a personality contest of their members. Someone famous (I think Groucho Marx) once said: "I wouldn't join any club that would have me as a member." We should not have that attitude about the Church. Christ has come to save us sinners, not the righteous.
I understand this, however, I do think that the behavior of the members of a Church do teach us something about the Church.
I'm tired of armchair apologetics. It's like every Roman Catholic with access to the internet and a copy of the catechism is now an apologetist. My experience has been that most of these people are uneducated and don't get any kind of 'nuance' in the faith. Part of the blame for that, IMHO, can be placed squarely with the Roman Catholic Church. They tossed out their history; the old liturgy, the writings of the saints, etc, so people can't learn.
For example, my parents have belonged to a "small faith group" for about 10 years. Their group studies the most banal, inane junk I've ever seen. Given the rich history of Roman Catholic, it makes me sick. But that's all they know because no one has told them otherwise. They use materials published by Catholic sources.
A Roman Catholic priest I know often says that the typical Roman Catholic is intellectually starving to death.
Obviously Orthodoxy does not have that problem.
I think what I've written about religious bullies is right on target. The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that it's right. The thing all bullies share is a sense of low sense esteem. In terms of religion, someone else's choice of something different makes them question their own choice. If they felt completely confident in their own choice they wouldn't be threatened by someone else's different choice. So the question for me is why do so many Roman Catholics *feel* less than secure about their own religious choice.
BTW, Francis, thanks for defending me against the "Christ killer" charge. I can't believe someone would even say that of me but I'm not surprised given the bizarreness of that forum.