When people grumble and say, “It isn’t your place to judge.” Firstly, it kind of is when you think about it. We are told to hold one another accountable. Secondly, no one is passing final judgment on anyone, that’s Gods job. We just make observations based on what is presented and construct an analysis. Thirdly, only people in a position of authority and power are able to pass the judgment being complained about. Fourthly, people are judged every day for a variety of reasons. You don’t get to pick and choose what you don’t want to be judged about.
The “it isn’t your place to judge" admonishment is one that I certainly pay attention to and I certainly go into self evaluation mode. I take it to mean that I do not have a good understanding of the situation.
I understand the observation versus judgement distinction, but an “it isn’t your place to judge" remains appropriate if you decide to verbalize your observation.
You don't get to pick and choose what you don’t want to be judged about but you have every right to fight against misrepresentation. The “it isn’t your place to judge" tact is perhaps too tactful for you.