Topic: So, Sibling Relationships?

[JamesR]

Just out of curiousity, is it natural for people to have problems with their siblings? I'm the oldest out of three, and while I absolutely adore my toddler sister, I--forgive me of the harshness--feel like I absolutely resent my ten year old brother. We're the exact opposites. I'm clean, OCD, organized and on-task, he's a messy, disorganized procrastinator. I'm an analytical thinker, he is an artistic visionary. Anyhow, we just fight so often and they can get pretty bad. Sometimes we cannot go ten minutes in the same room with each other without fighting.

How should I deal with my struggles with my younger brother? He angers me so much, the kid pushes your buttons. Being the older sibling, I'm in charge of him, so whenever he leaves a mess, screws up or does something bad, I usually somehow end up getting in trouble for it by our parents because they always love to shift responsibility onto me. Also, how is this going to affect our future relationships when we are adults? Are we forever going to be somewhat estranged from each other? Or will we look back on our childhood and laugh at our feuds?

[PeterTheAleut]

Just out of curiousity, is it natural for people to have problems with their siblings? I'm the oldest out of three, and while I absolutely adore my toddler sister, I--forgive me of the harshness--feel like I absolutely resent my ten year old brother. We're the exact opposites. I'm clean, OCD, organized and on-task, he's a messy, disorganized procrastinator. I'm an analytical thinker, he is an artistic visionary. Anyhow, we just fight so often and they can get pretty bad. Sometimes we cannot go ten minutes in the same room with each other without fighting.

How should I deal with my struggles with my younger brother? He angers me so much, the kid pushes your buttons. Being the older sibling, I'm in charge of him, so whenever he leaves a mess, screws up or does something bad, I usually somehow end up getting in trouble for it by our parents because they always love to shift responsibility onto me. Also, how is this going to affect our future relationships when we are adults? Are we forever going to be somewhat estranged from each other? Or will we look back on our childhood and laugh at our feuds?

My brother and I are both in our 40's. We both realized many years ago that we can't live with each other even as adults because we constantly squabble over so many things when we do share the same living space. As long as we live in different states, we have a wonderful relationship with each other.

[LBK]

Just out of curiousity, is it natural for people to have problems with their siblings?

YES!!! 

Especially if the siblings do not have the same temperament or personality. Even when they do, it's still not always wine and roses.  Sometimes the friction and conflict disappears by adulthood, sometimes, as PtA wrote, it never really does.

[Ansgar]

You should try being a twin. Now there's a challenge.

[primuspilus]

he's a messy

He's a child.

disorganized

He's a child.

procrastinator

He's a child.

artistic visionary

He's different.

You are also a child. Im not being insulting. But you're still really young. I hated my brother growing up. I even pulled a knife on him once (of course other things were happening at the time). However now he's one my my best friends, and one of my personal heroes. Things'll change. They always do.

PP