Lord have mercy!
Maybe my priest's advice will help you: in the beginning (before conversion and just right after it) God as a good Father leads us by the hand, but after some period, when we should be more mature, He lets go of your hand, but He stills being close to us - children must learn "walk" without any special help. At this time we should trust Him and use our experience and knowledge from the time God was leading us so closely.
As always, we have to go through difficult time that after it we can be stronger and more sure that our choice was right. So, pray and participate in the Holy Mysteries - that's the best treatment for our souls.