Author Topic: Schlock Icons  (Read 159703 times)

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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #135 on: November 25, 2012, 12:52:33 AM »
Here to ruin your day!































YES! Finally some more icons of the all-glorious Stalin of thrice-terrible memory.
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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #136 on: November 25, 2012, 12:56:14 AM »
Also, are the three Persons emanating from the Tetragrammaton? Modalism and name worship all in one icon!

There has to be an icon that sums up all wacky Russian sects in one. Someone please find it.
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Offline William

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #137 on: November 25, 2012, 01:06:13 AM »
Stalin is laughing somewhere deep in hell.
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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #138 on: November 25, 2012, 01:16:29 AM »
Stalin is laughing somewhere deep in hell.

In the icon where he is between Sts. Alexander Nevsky and Dmitri Donskoi, it's like they're taking him in for questioning. They probably have some questions for the artist as well. One might think them less terrifying than Stalin, but one would be wrong.
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #139 on: November 25, 2012, 02:54:40 AM »
There has to be an icon that sums up all wacky Russian sects in one. Someone please find it.

Oooooh, that's a tall order, even for LBK's forensic abilities. Only because the gamut of wacky Russian sects covers such a wide range. Russians never do anything by halves.  ;)
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Offline Azul

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #140 on: November 25, 2012, 07:51:38 AM »
I am all for freedom of expression. I am also all for putting Robert Lentz in jail forever, with no painting supplies.

+1
+2

One of my favorite "Schlock Icons"


Origen of Alexandria
Who drew (not wrote, because it is uncanonical) this Image?

The artist is William Hart McNichols, a Roman Catholic Jesuit priest, and arguably the best-known protege of Robert Lentz. He has said this about his mentor: "Lentz is regarded as one of the foremost authorities on icons today."

Says it all, really. The bulk of McNichols' work is no less egregious and blasphemous than Lentz's. McNichols has not only painted an "icon" of a declared heretic, but seems to be unaware that Origen was an avowed iconoclast. Oh, the irony!  :P :P ::)

Origen was an Iconoclast?
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Offline Azul

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #141 on: November 25, 2012, 07:57:56 AM »
So would this be considered schlock? It's a "Young Virgin Mary."



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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #142 on: November 25, 2012, 04:10:05 PM »
Ironically, the "Orthodox" icon of Stalin (the one the mustache-less man, probably mustacheless out of reverence for Stalin, is holding) does more to elevate Stalin to God-like status than any Soviet iconography did. Orthodox icons of Stalin should display him as a non-martyr or a martyr of one believes he was killed (but certainly not depict him like Christ). He should be holding either a list of his victims or a cigar. He does not give blessings, but may give a "high five" or thumbs-up, but the thumbs-up must be accompanied by an enigmatic, unsettling grin. I think, if it's a gift for Isa, Stalin can be depicted holding maps, either of gulags or conquests.
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Offline Gunnarr

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #143 on: November 27, 2012, 02:37:31 PM »
the stalin icon is the worst one so far
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Offline Fabio Leite

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #144 on: November 30, 2012, 10:54:50 AM »
Probably not even intended as icon, but the halo is there. :)


And this also:
« Last Edit: November 30, 2012, 10:56:52 AM by Fabio Leite »
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Offline Agabus

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #145 on: November 30, 2012, 11:08:21 AM »
I know this is of non-Orthodox origin (it is the Catholic ‘Our Lady of the New Advent’), but...Is there any rule against having Christ depicted holding, I dunno, greenery?



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Offline NicholasMyra

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #146 on: November 30, 2012, 01:17:52 PM »
Is there any rule against having Christ depicted holding, I dunno, greenery?
Only if it is coriander, olive or lemon.
« Last Edit: November 30, 2012, 01:18:03 PM by NicholasMyra »
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Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #147 on: November 30, 2012, 03:34:43 PM »
Here is one that claims to be of Arius the heretic




And Judas Iscariot, who betrayed Christ (It is monastery icons, though, to be fair, but still a shlock icon nonetheless

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Online Schultz

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #148 on: November 30, 2012, 03:43:07 PM »
Here is one that claims to be of Arius the heretic




And Judas Iscariot, who betrayed Christ (It is monastery icons, though, to be fair, but still a shlock icon nonetheless



I find both of these far more offensive than any Stalin icon.
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Offline Agabus

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #149 on: November 30, 2012, 04:07:25 PM »
Might as well round it out — Nestorious:



Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

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Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #150 on: November 30, 2012, 04:18:39 PM »
Might as well round it out — Nestorious:





Ha. I was trying to find one of him, and couldn't.

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Offline akimori makoto

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #151 on: November 30, 2012, 05:48:10 PM »
Might as well round it out — Nestorious:





That appears to be St Gregory the Wonderworker.
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Offline akimori makoto

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #152 on: November 30, 2012, 05:49:06 PM »
Here is one that claims to be of Arius the heretic


And I think that's St Spyridon.
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Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #153 on: November 30, 2012, 05:50:03 PM »
Here is one that claims to be of Arius the heretic


And I think that's St Spyridon.

Oops, sorry  :-[
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #154 on: November 30, 2012, 05:58:06 PM »
Might as well round it out — Nestorious:





That's not Nestorius. That is a 12th century icon of St Gregory the Wonderworker of Neocaesaria.
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #155 on: November 30, 2012, 05:59:42 PM »
Here is one that claims to be of Arius the heretic


And I think that's St Spyridon.

Yes, it is St Spyridon. The inscription is pretty clear, and the saint is wearing his distinctive wicker shepherd's hat.
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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #156 on: November 30, 2012, 05:59:58 PM »
Everyone's fooling everyone  :police:
« Last Edit: November 30, 2012, 06:00:06 PM by Cyrillic »
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #157 on: November 30, 2012, 06:01:06 PM »

And Judas Iscariot, who betrayed Christ (It is monastery icons, though, to be fair, but still a shlock icon nonetheless



Oh, good grief! Even more reason not to buy from Monastery Icons ...  :o :P :P :P
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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #158 on: November 30, 2012, 06:01:44 PM »
I would like to see some icons of Ivan the Terrible before I die.
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #159 on: November 30, 2012, 06:03:34 PM »
Is there any rule against having Christ depicted holding, I dunno, greenery?
Only if it is coriander, olive or lemon.

Coriander? Coriander?? OREGANO!!  :laugh:
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Offline Agabus

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #160 on: November 30, 2012, 06:09:04 PM »
Might as well round it out — Nestorious:





That's not Nestorius. That is a 12th century icon of St Gregory the Wonderworker of Neocaesaria.
DAMN YOU, GOOGLE!

So much for a one-off heretical icon post. I thought it was too well preserved to be true...Every other image I could find of Nestorious had the face scratched off.

Gotta brush up on my Greek.
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #161 on: November 30, 2012, 06:19:37 PM »
I know this is of non-Orthodox origin (it is the Catholic ‘Our Lady of the New Advent’), but...Is there any rule against having Christ depicted holding, I dunno, greenery?





The consistent Orthodox iconographic tradition is that the Christ-child holds a small scroll, symbolizing divine wisdom (after all, He is the Wisdom and the Word of God) if He holds anything.
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Offline witega

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #162 on: November 30, 2012, 06:21:31 PM »
I would like to see some icons of Ivan the Terrible before I die.



No halo, but clearly in an iconographic style.
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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #163 on: November 30, 2012, 06:26:47 PM »
I would like to see some icons of Ivan the Terrible before I die.



No halo, but clearly in an iconographic style.

I was aware of this. It's just a near-contemporaneous portrait. Since Western portraiture was not really in Muscovy at the time, iconographic art was the sort of baseline, it seems.

In traditional Orthodox icons of St. Ivan Grozny, he is holding a severed head, dripping blood.

I'd like to know what the Slavonic says.
« Last Edit: November 30, 2012, 06:27:45 PM by Shanghaiski »
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Offline akimori makoto

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #164 on: November 30, 2012, 06:29:47 PM »
Here is one that claims to be of Arius the heretic


And I think that's St Spyridon.

Yes, it is St Spyridon. The inscription is pretty clear, and the saint is wearing his distinctive wicker shepherd's hat.

Oh, so that's what it is? I thought it was some kind of malformed giant acorn.
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #165 on: November 30, 2012, 07:09:01 PM »
Someone asked for "icons" of Ivan the Terrible:



And this is allegedly a myrrh-streaming version:



The spiel at the bottom is a velichaniya (magnification, a hymn of praise sung at Matins at the Polyeleos/Polyelei, as the priest stands before the icon of the saint or feast being commemorated, censing it) to the "saint":

We magnify you, our great-martyr, beloved of Christ, and divinely-wise Tsar Ioann, and we honor your holy memory, for you pray to Christ our God for us.

Un-believable.  :P :P :P :P :P :P
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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #166 on: November 30, 2012, 08:04:45 PM »
The style is a lot better than those of Stalin, however.

Great martyr?

I read in a couple articles quotes from people in the Russian Chruch that myrrh streaming from an icon isn't proof of sanctity of the individual depicted. This was before the Royal Martyrs were canonized. Same also with St. Yevgeny Rodionov.

It is unfortunate there are no bloody heads or that he and Metropolitan St. Philip are not together.
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #167 on: November 30, 2012, 10:00:09 PM »
The style is a lot better than those of Stalin, however.

Great martyr?

I read in a couple articles quotes from people in the Russian Chruch that myrrh streaming from an icon isn't proof of sanctity of the individual depicted. This was before the Royal Martyrs were canonized. Same also with St. Yevgeny Rodionov.

It is unfortunate there are no bloody heads or that he and Metropolitan St. Philip are not together.

Indeed. What these fanatics overlook is that their beloved "Tsar-martyr" will never be proclaimed a saint, in part because of his part in the murder of Metropolitan St Philip of Moscow. The tsar is referred to in the festal hymns for St Philip as "a new Herod" and "a new Pharaoh". Hardly the stuff of sainthood.
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Offline mike

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #168 on: November 30, 2012, 10:08:17 PM »
Indeed. What these fanatics overlook is that their beloved "Tsar-martyr" will never be proclaimed a saint, in part because of his part in the murder of Metropolitan St Philip of Moscow. The tsar is referred to in the festal hymns for St Philip as "a new Herod" and "a new Pharaoh". Hardly the stuff of sainthood.

St. Columban and St. Finnian?
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #169 on: November 30, 2012, 10:14:44 PM »
Indeed. What these fanatics overlook is that their beloved "Tsar-martyr" will never be proclaimed a saint, in part because of his part in the murder of Metropolitan St Philip of Moscow. The tsar is referred to in the festal hymns for St Philip as "a new Herod" and "a new Pharaoh". Hardly the stuff of sainthood.

St. Columban and St. Finnian?

Did one murder the other?
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Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #170 on: November 30, 2012, 10:31:58 PM »
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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #171 on: November 30, 2012, 10:37:31 PM »
Indeed. What these fanatics overlook is that their beloved "Tsar-martyr" will never be proclaimed a saint, in part because of his part in the murder of Metropolitan St Philip of Moscow. The tsar is referred to in the festal hymns for St Philip as "a new Herod" and "a new Pharaoh". Hardly the stuff of sainthood.

St. Columban and St. Finnian?

Did one murder the other?

They were trying to.
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #172 on: November 30, 2012, 11:24:59 PM »


Oh, yes, the pigeon pair to the Mother of God of 9/11, by the hand of another of my "favorites". He's so all over the shop, it's not funny. Thanks for this, I only have it on file in a rather small size.
« Last Edit: November 30, 2012, 11:28:59 PM by LBK »
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Offline Agabus

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #173 on: November 30, 2012, 11:42:25 PM »
One of the weirder Holy Trinity icons out there:

Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

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Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #174 on: November 30, 2012, 11:56:03 PM »
One of the weirder Holy Trinity icons out there:



Makes me dizzy looking at that
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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #175 on: December 01, 2012, 12:10:11 AM »

And Judas Iscariot, who betrayed Christ (It is monastery icons, though, to be fair, but still a shlock icon nonetheless



Oh, good grief! Even more reason not to buy from Monastery Icons ...  :o :P :P :P

Ugh. Holding the rope he used to hang himself.
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Offline neon_knights

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #176 on: December 01, 2012, 12:43:41 AM »

And Judas Iscariot, who betrayed Christ (It is monastery icons, though, to be fair, but still a shlock icon nonetheless



Oh, good grief! Even more reason not to buy from Monastery Icons ...  :o :P :P :P

Ugh. Holding the rope he used to hang himself.

Not to mention his intestines.

Disgusting icon.

Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #177 on: December 01, 2012, 08:44:48 AM »

And Judas Iscariot, who betrayed Christ (It is monastery icons, though, to be fair, but still a shlock icon nonetheless



Oh, good grief! Even more reason not to buy from Monastery Icons ...  :o :P :P :P

Ugh. Holding the rope he used to hang himself.

Not to mention his intestines.

Disgusting icon.

Oh gross. I didn't even notice that.
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Offline Fabio Leite

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #178 on: December 01, 2012, 12:03:06 PM »
LBK, what's your evaluation of the works below? They were made with the marquetry technique.
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Offline mike

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #179 on: December 01, 2012, 12:10:19 PM »
These are not bad^
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