Author Topic: Schlock Icons  (Read 148170 times)

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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1305 on: December 27, 2013, 11:49:13 PM »
Ouch, my eyes hurt now.  >:(

+1 Even a single picture from these that Michal presented is not acceptable, totally. I don't know the source, but at least one of them is Ukrainian (the caption "Rizdvo"), maybe it's Greek Catholic?... They sometimes do very strange "icons" on the basis of the true ones...

Oh my goodness. Those really were some bad ones.  :-[

Our Lady of the Facepalm had the right premise, but a flawed execution.
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Offline Shanghaiski

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1306 on: December 27, 2013, 11:50:04 PM »

I really, really have trouble understanding what possesses people to paint such garbage.  >:(

What or who?  :o
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Offline mike

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1307 on: December 28, 2013, 05:05:00 PM »
Hyperdox Herman, Eastern Orthodox Christian News - fb, Eastern Orthodox Christian News - tt

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Offline NicholasMyra

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1308 on: December 28, 2013, 05:10:15 PM »
Is that the Patriarch Jacob as one of the St. Gregory's, with the title of St. James?
« Last Edit: December 28, 2013, 05:11:59 PM by NicholasMyra »
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Offline Antonis

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1309 on: December 28, 2013, 06:05:13 PM »
Is that the Patriarch Jacob as one of the St. Gregory's, with the title of St. James?

No, it's St. James the Brother of the Lord with no such confusion.  :P

I believe it stems from hymns such as these:

Troparion (Tone 2)
Proclaim the wonder, O Joseph, to David, the ancestor of God: you saw a Virgin great with Child, you gave glory with the shepherds, you worshipped with the Magi, you received the news from the angel. Pray to Christ God to save our souls!

Kontakion (Tone 3)
Today godly David is filled with joy; Joseph and James offer praise. The glorious crown of their kinship with Christ fills them with great joy. They sing praises to the One ineffably born on earth, and they cry out: "O Compassionate One, save those who honor You!"
As I dissipate, Christ precipitates.

Offline Dominika

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1310 on: January 10, 2014, 02:52:05 PM »
Pray for persecuted Christians, especially in Serbian Kosovo and Raška, Egypt and Syria

Offline Iconodule

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1311 on: January 10, 2014, 02:56:18 PM »

Offline hecma925

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1312 on: January 10, 2014, 02:57:50 PM »
Chernobyl?
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Offline TheTrisagion

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1313 on: January 10, 2014, 03:15:00 PM »
It looks like it is from the movie "12 Monkeys"
Guys! They're not intercoursing. It's just an unfortunate angle.

Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1314 on: January 10, 2014, 06:18:56 PM »


The inscription seems strange, as best as I can make out, both words mean radiation.

Any Serbian speakers out there who can help?  :)
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Offline Dominika

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1315 on: January 10, 2014, 06:29:52 PM »


The inscription seems strange, as best as I can make out, both words mean radiation.

Any Serbian speakers out there who can help?  :)

Yes, that's true that both words mean the same, however I'm not able to read the last two letters of the first word to see if it's an adjective ;) Anyway, I found it on official website of the diocese of Kruševac in an article about the third day of Nativity in the monastery Lazarica close to the town and in a chapel in town's hospital - I don't know, where this picture was taken, but I think the second option is much more probable ;) Ah, and this hospital is usual one ;)
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1316 on: January 10, 2014, 06:39:50 PM »


The inscription seems strange, as best as I can make out, both words mean radiation.

Any Serbian speakers out there who can help?  :)

Yes, that's true that both words mean the same, however I'm not able to read the last two letters of the first word to see if it's an adjective ;) Anyway, I found it on official website of the diocese of Kruševac in an article about the third day of Nativity in the monastery Lazarica close to the town and in a chapel in town's hospital - I don't know, where this picture was taken, but I think the second option is much more probable ;) Ah, and this hospital is usual one ;)

Thanks.  :)

I still find the inscription strange, even if the first word is an adjective. Is the Mother of God the "radiance of radiation"? If this image was painted to show her as the protector of workers in the nuclear industry, then perhaps an inscription reflecting that would have made more sense. BTW, holy patronage of specific occupational groups is much more a feature of non-Orthodox religious art, not Orthodox iconography.

Quote
Ah, and this hospital is usual one ;)

I'm not sure what you mean by this.  ???
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Offline Dominika

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1317 on: January 10, 2014, 06:44:48 PM »
Quote
Ah, and this hospital is usual one ;)

I'm not sure what you mean by this.  ???

I meant this hospital is not a special one for people suffering from irradiation :laugh:
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Offline biro

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1318 on: January 10, 2014, 06:45:33 PM »
Chernobyl?

Could be. I'm sure the people in Ukraine remember it with much sorrow.
« Last Edit: January 10, 2014, 06:46:07 PM by biro »

Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1319 on: January 10, 2014, 07:06:37 PM »
Quote
Ah, and this hospital is usual one ;)

I'm not sure what you mean by this.  ???

I meant this hospital is not a special one for people suffering from irradiation :laugh:

Thanks.  :)
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Offline Avdima

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1320 on: January 13, 2014, 09:20:00 AM »
Found this whilst GIS searching for Coptic Icons





Abbot Makarios the Terminally Dim
« Last Edit: January 13, 2014, 09:21:09 AM by Avdima »

Offline ilyazhito

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1321 on: January 18, 2014, 03:36:03 PM »
That guy looks really demented. I don't think you can call that an icon in ANY sense of the word. It's just a Bedouin making a weird gesture.

Offline Keble

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1322 on: January 18, 2014, 10:36:40 PM »
I didn't know Margaret Keane had converted.

Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1323 on: January 20, 2014, 09:09:13 PM »

Offline Mor Ephrem

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1324 on: January 20, 2014, 09:52:14 PM »
How playful he is, our sweet baby God!
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Offline Agabus

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1325 on: January 20, 2014, 10:19:44 PM »
I think there's a similar one earlier in the thread, but who can resist in light of today's national holiday?

Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1326 on: January 20, 2014, 11:36:22 PM »
How playful he is, our sweet baby God!

Unfortunately, that image is far too saccharine and cutesy in how it depicts the Virgin and Child. The Pelagonitissa and Vzigraniye (Joyful) are much better examples, which maintain a proper seriousness to both figures, while expressing the Child's playfulness:

Joyful:




BTW, what is the Child in the image posted by Eastern Mind holding?  ???

« Last Edit: January 20, 2014, 11:38:26 PM by LBK »
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Offline Nephi

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1327 on: January 20, 2014, 11:38:39 PM »
BTW, what is the Child in the posted image above holding?  ???



:angel:

Offline Mor Ephrem

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1328 on: January 21, 2014, 02:25:38 AM »
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Offline Mor Ephrem

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1329 on: January 21, 2014, 02:32:15 AM »
"Do not tempt the Mor thy Mod."

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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1330 on: January 21, 2014, 02:38:38 AM »
Miley Cyrus Votive Candle



For sheer blasphemous schlockiness, the busty Serbian singer from many pages back still beats this, I'm afraid.  :P
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Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1331 on: January 21, 2014, 02:39:19 AM »
And Beyonce



The kid looks scared out of his little mind ....
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Offline WeldeMikael

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1332 on: January 21, 2014, 03:02:19 AM »
I wonder what goes through their heads to do this  ;D

Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1333 on: January 21, 2014, 03:10:18 AM »
I wonder what goes through their heads to do this  ;D

Vanity, self-expression, shock value ....
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Offline Nephi

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1334 on: January 21, 2014, 03:26:12 AM »
Miley Cyrus Votive Candle



They clawed, they chained our Hearts in vain
I jumped never asking why
I assist, and fell before your Ghost
A Mother's love undenied

They won't ever say I just walked away
I will always love you
I won't sin or lie, dedicating my whole life
I will always serve you

Bless'd among women, they will call
I never sinned against your love
All I wanted was to obey your law
All you ever did was bless me
Yeah, you, you bless me

I saw you high up in the sky
And now, you are coming down
You are the Word, our cries you heard
And now, we'll escape the ground

They won't ever say I just walked away
I will always love you
I won't sin or lie, dedicating my whole life
I will always serve you

Bless'd among women, they will call
I never sinned against your love
All I wanted was to obey your law
All you ever did was bless me

Bless'd among women, they will call
Yeah, I just obeyed my God and Son
Raised up instead of letting me fall
All you ever did was bless me
Yeah, you, you bless me

I knew you would end the war
I just wanted to let you in
And by letting you be born
I allowed the Lord to win
I knew you would end the war
I just wanted to let you in
I allowed the Lord to win

They won't ever say I just walked away
I will always love you

Bless'd among women, they will call
I never sinned against your love
All I wanted was to obey your law
All you ever did was bless me

I came in like a wrecking ball
Yeah, I just closed my eyes and swung
Left me crashing in a blazing fall
All you ever did was wreck me
Yeah, you, you bless me
Yeah, you, you bless me

Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1335 on: January 21, 2014, 08:28:58 AM »
Quote from: Nephi link=topic=47878.m :laugh:msg1067056 date=1390275519
BTW, what is the Child in the posted image above holding?  ???



:angel:

 :laugh:

Offline Alpo

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1336 on: January 24, 2014, 03:44:50 PM »
My absolute favourite so far:

http://www.girodivite.it/IMG/jpg/san_gennaro.jpg

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Offline Mor Ephrem

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1337 on: January 24, 2014, 04:40:44 PM »
My absolute favourite so far:

http://www.girodivite.it/IMG/jpg/san_gennaro.jpg

(How do you decrease size of images here again?)

Click on "quote" at top right to reply to me, and look below:




What a face, what an expression...
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Offline Eastern Mind

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1338 on: January 24, 2014, 06:29:53 PM »



Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1339 on: January 24, 2014, 07:09:42 PM »




Ah, another from our friend Robert Lentz. More like schmaltz than heresy. Kitty looks impressed ....  :P
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Offline biro

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1340 on: January 24, 2014, 07:10:30 PM »
Does this mean kitteh is a saint too?  :angel:

Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1341 on: January 24, 2014, 07:12:12 PM »
Does this mean kitteh is a saint too?  :angel:

Given Lentz's idiosyncracies regarding what/who is holy, I wouldn't rule it out.  ;)
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Offline orthonorm

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1342 on: January 24, 2014, 08:14:55 PM »
That guy looks really demented. I don't think you can call that an icon in ANY sense of the word. It's just a Bedouin making a weird gesture.

Have you seen Oriental Christian visual work before? While having a different flavor of oddity, I am not sure I am not just as putt off by them, whether they be the flash like ones of today or the coloring book ones of yestermillennium.
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Offline NicholasMyra

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1343 on: January 24, 2014, 08:38:04 PM »
That guy looks really demented. I don't think you can call that an icon in ANY sense of the word. It's just a Bedouin making a weird gesture.

Have you seen Oriental Christian visual work before? While having a different flavor of oddity, I am not sure I am not just as putt off by them, whether they be the flash like ones of today or the coloring book ones of yestermillennium.


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>"AFFIRMATIVE."
« Last Edit: January 24, 2014, 08:38:22 PM by NicholasMyra »
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Offline Romaios

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1344 on: January 24, 2014, 08:51:18 PM »
« Last Edit: January 24, 2014, 09:12:01 PM by Romaios »

Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1345 on: January 24, 2014, 11:02:18 PM »
"MENAS, WE ARE FRIENDS."

>"AFFIRMATIVE."

There are also the portraits of Al Fayoum: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fayum_mummy_portraits

Neither the icon posted by NicholasMyra, nor the al-Fayoum portraits are grotesque or unsettling to look at. The painting posted earlier is.
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Offline Agabus

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1346 on: January 25, 2014, 01:56:56 AM »
Saint Oscar Romero, with buildings burning beneath attack helicopters in the background.



EDIT: Didn't realize until now the RCC titles him "Servant of God" in their canonization scheme.

« Last Edit: January 25, 2014, 01:58:30 AM by Agabus »
Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

THE OPINIONS HERE MAY NOT REFLECT THE ACTUAL OR PERCEIVED ORTHODOX CHURCH

Offline Agabus

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1347 on: January 25, 2014, 02:15:56 AM »
Not sure what's happening here:


Now available in blond:



Needing a hug on the cross:


Holy Family with teenage Christ:

« Last Edit: January 25, 2014, 02:27:18 AM by Agabus »
Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

THE OPINIONS HERE MAY NOT REFLECT THE ACTUAL OR PERCEIVED ORTHODOX CHURCH

Offline LBK

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1348 on: January 25, 2014, 03:24:20 AM »
Saint Oscar Romero, with buildings burning beneath attack helicopters in the background.



EDIT: Didn't realize until now the RCC titles him "Servant of God" in their canonization scheme.



There is much to be criticized in the above image, but what is perhaps the worst element is the way the child in Oscar Romero's arms is portrayed: wearing red and blue garments, and posed in the same way as the Christ-child in icons of the Mother of God of the Passion, right down to the loose sandal. All that's missing is the halo. Subversion posing as theology - disgraceful doesn't begin to describe it.  >:(
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Offline Alpo

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Re: Schlock Icons
« Reply #1349 on: January 25, 2014, 03:31:47 AM »
Not sure what's happening here:

Isn't that a Torah scroll? I like that. It smacks judaizing but the idea is nice.
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