Author Topic: Going to Confession?  (Read 1522 times)

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Offline Russkie

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Going to Confession?
« on: September 14, 2012, 04:43:18 PM »
I was baptized into Russian Orthodoxy when I was little.  But for one reason or another my parents stopped attending, which I think simply because of laziness.  As a chain reaction,  I followed suit regrettably in my early teen years.  Now I'm 25,  I have control of my own life, and I want to transition back.  I attended the Hours and Divine Liturgy at the parish when I attended many years ago, the rector asked if this was my first time here even.  I know all the protocols and procedures that are followed.  I grabbed the parish schedule and saw that Confessions are coming up.

At this point,  should I make a slow transition of attending the Sunday Services or should I attend Confessions before Sunday Service?  Keep in mind I attended infrequently other orthodox parishes during that time period in Russia on my own.

Offline pensateomnia

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2012, 04:45:17 PM »
Why not go to confession?
But for I am a man not textueel I wol noght telle of textes neuer a deel. (Chaucer, The Manciple's Tale, 1.131)

Offline Russkie

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #2 on: September 14, 2012, 04:51:22 PM »
Why not go to confession?

How do I explain to the rector, that I haven't been to his parish for so long that he doesn't even recognize me.
At this point, he thinks I'm a inquirer.

Offline Schultz

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2012, 04:55:12 PM »
Why not go to confession?

How do I explain to the rector, that I haven't been to his parish for so long that he doesn't even recognize me.
At this point, he thinks I'm a inquirer.

tell him exactly what you told us.
"Hearing a nun's confession is like being stoned to death with popcorn." --Abp. Fulton Sheen

Offline HabteSelassie

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #4 on: September 14, 2012, 05:18:57 PM »
Greetings in that Divine and Most Precious Name of Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

Why not go to confession?

How do I explain to the rector, that I haven't been to his parish for so long that he doesn't even recognize me.
At this point, he thinks I'm a inquirer.

Start with something like, "Bless me please Father for I have sinned.. is been such-and-such since my last confession and in that time.." and then unburden your heart from there.  Of course, I would suggest this, perhaps it would we best to develop a personal relationship with your Confessor before confessing? That way you have a sense of trust and boundaries.  The Catholic pseudo-anonymous confession has its perks, but the intimacy of the Father-Confessor relationship in the Orthodox Church is a bit more rounded in approach.  Our spiritual fathers are indeed our true therapists, who use the spiritual medicine of the Divine Mysteries to heal our inward wounds. However, as with all therapy, you have to implicitly trust and understand the doctor in the first place and further it is often best if they know us across a long arc to better understand the nuances of our individual situatons :)

stay blessed,
habte selasse
« Last Edit: September 14, 2012, 05:19:47 PM by HabteSelassie »
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Offline Russkie

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #5 on: September 14, 2012, 05:44:14 PM »
Of course, I would suggest this, perhaps it would we best to develop a personal relationship with your Confessor before confessing?

Thats what I meant to ask.  It would be unusual to go confessions without any relationship.

Offline Pan Michał

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #6 on: September 14, 2012, 06:13:20 PM »
tell him exactly what you told us.

+1

Offline Kerdy

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #7 on: September 14, 2012, 06:24:11 PM »
Why not go to confession?

How do I explain to the rector, that I haven't been to his parish for so long that he doesn't even recognize me.
At this point, he thinks I'm a inquirer.

tell him exactly what you told us.
Agreed.  Not only will his questions be answered, but he can answer your questions and provide any guidance you want or need.  The first thing I did before attending my parish was meet the priest and explain where I came from and why I was there.

Offline HabteSelassie

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #8 on: September 14, 2012, 07:04:48 PM »
Greetings in that Divine and Most Precious Name of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

Of course, I would suggest this, perhaps it would we best to develop a personal relationship with your Confessor before confessing?

Thats what I meant to ask.  It would be unusual to go confessions without any relationship.

Not necessarily but permitting that he has the time the priest would probably suggest at the least that y'all have some lunch or coffee afterwards :)

stay blessed,
habte selassie
"Yet stand aloof from stupid questionings and geneologies and strifes and fightings about law, for they are without benefit and vain." Titus 3:10

Offline LizaSymonenko

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #9 on: September 14, 2012, 07:11:25 PM »

Why do you need to develop a relationship with the priest before going to Confession?

You aren't confessing to him, but, to God.

I often go to Confession with priests I have never met.

It's good to get "know" your parish priest, but I hardly think it needs to be a prerequisite to confessing your sins.

I suggest you attend Vespers, go to Confession and afterward perhaps have a short chat with the priest.

Conquer evil men by your gentle kindness, and make zealous men wonder at your goodness. Put the lover of legality to shame by your compassion. With the afflicted be afflicted in mind. Love all men, but keep distant from all men.
—St. Isaac of Syria

Offline Kerdy

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #10 on: September 14, 2012, 07:57:42 PM »

Why do you need to develop a relationship with the priest before going to Confession?

You aren't confessing to him, but, to God.

I often go to Confession with priests I have never met.

It's good to get "know" your parish priest, but I hardly think it needs to be a prerequisite to confessing your sins.

I suggest you attend Vespers, go to Confession and afterward perhaps have a short chat with the priest.


Each case is specific, but since he has been absent from church for so long, it would be beneficial to both the priest and him to talk before the first confession, of for no other reason to ensure he is properly prepared for confession.

Offline Green_Umbrella

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #11 on: September 14, 2012, 08:49:24 PM »
Why not go to confession?
How do I explain to the rector, that I haven't been to his parish for so long that he doesn't even recognize me.
At this point, he thinks I'm a inquirer.
tell him exactly what you told us.

A perfect answer.

Offline Russkie

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #12 on: September 15, 2012, 11:09:48 PM »
Halleluja!  He remembered me and my father,  its been nearly a decade. And he was truly happy that I decided to come back.

Offline Kerdy

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #13 on: September 15, 2012, 11:14:00 PM »
Wonderful!  I'm glad you were able to reconnect!

Offline LizaSymonenko

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #14 on: September 16, 2012, 09:03:23 PM »

Excellent news!!!

Conquer evil men by your gentle kindness, and make zealous men wonder at your goodness. Put the lover of legality to shame by your compassion. With the afflicted be afflicted in mind. Love all men, but keep distant from all men.
—St. Isaac of Syria

Offline Nephi

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #15 on: September 17, 2012, 12:25:02 AM »
Halleluja!  He remembered me and my father,  its been nearly a decade. And he was truly happy that I decided to come back.

That's great! :)

Offline Pan Michał

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #16 on: September 17, 2012, 05:12:24 AM »
Halleluja!  He remembered me and my father,  its been nearly a decade. And he was truly happy that I decided to come back.

Good to hear/read it :)

Offline elephant

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #17 on: September 17, 2012, 07:49:55 AM »
Glory be to God!

Offline WPM

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #18 on: September 21, 2012, 10:24:34 AM »
I can go to confession twice a year and I'm fine.

Offline LizaSymonenko

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #19 on: September 24, 2012, 10:04:57 AM »
I can go to confession twice a year and I'm fine.

What?

How do you remember to mention all 6 months worth of sins?

Besides, aren't we taught to Confess our sins no less than four times a year?
Conquer evil men by your gentle kindness, and make zealous men wonder at your goodness. Put the lover of legality to shame by your compassion. With the afflicted be afflicted in mind. Love all men, but keep distant from all men.
—St. Isaac of Syria

Offline WPM

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #20 on: September 25, 2012, 11:27:50 AM »
I can go to confession twice a year and I'm fine.

What?

How do you remember to mention all 6 months worth of sins?

Besides, aren't we taught to Confess our sins no less than four times a year?



If you want sacramental confession 4 times a year that's fine but the minimum is meeting with your priest of choice at least 2-3 times each calendar year.

Offline JoeS2

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #21 on: September 25, 2012, 12:07:27 PM »
Quote from: HabteSelassie  link=topic=46967.msg806370#msg806370 date=1347657537
Of course, I would suggest this, perhaps it would we best to develop a personal relationship with your Confessor before confessing?

Thats what I meant to ask.  It would be unusual to go confessions without any relationship.

The priest is also your spiritual physician who is there to help you through your tough times of combating temptation.  This spiritual relationship with the priest is very useful in that he will become familiar with those sins you are having a tough time overcoming.  Hopefully, this relationship will enhance your communion with a Christlike life and free yourself of the illness of sin itself.  A priest who has been a priest for a number of years has heard it all.   Im sure being away from the sacraments will not be a shocking experience for a priest to hear.  What is important is REPENTANCE.  That is, the willingness not to repeat that sin again.  We all fall down, it is the getting up that is important.  Always keep your confessor close to you spritirually and you will find peace.

(PS) Frequent confession is essential, at least once a month.
« Last Edit: September 25, 2012, 12:08:30 PM by JoeS2 »

Offline LizaSymonenko

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #22 on: September 25, 2012, 01:38:01 PM »
I can go to confession twice a year and I'm fine.

What?

How do you remember to mention all 6 months worth of sins?

Besides, aren't we taught to Confess our sins no less than four times a year?



If you want sacramental confession 4 times a year that's fine but the minimum is meeting with your priest of choice at least 2-3 times each calendar year.

I'm confused as to what you are saying above.  So, four times for the Sacrament of Confession, if you want.  However, you must meet with your priest 2-3 times a year for non-sacramental confession?  what's that?  You meet over coffee at Starbuck's?

Conquer evil men by your gentle kindness, and make zealous men wonder at your goodness. Put the lover of legality to shame by your compassion. With the afflicted be afflicted in mind. Love all men, but keep distant from all men.
—St. Isaac of Syria

Offline Manalive

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #23 on: September 25, 2012, 01:50:51 PM »
In the Russian tradition confession is part of the prepartion for communion. That means going at least every other week at a minium if you receieve. I don't think that would be any different in a Western Rite ROCOR parish.
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Offline JoeS2

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #24 on: September 25, 2012, 05:34:51 PM »
In the Russian tradition confession is part of the prepartion for communion. That means going at least every other week at a minium if you receieve. I don't think that would be any different in a Western Rite ROCOR parish.

I bet if you would randomly take a poll of the average person on the street and asked them " Do you commit sin every day?" I would  hazard a guess that they would say no.  Today we are having a hard time recognizing sin when it is committed.  Some folks would say they never sin.  But as Orthodox Christians we know we sin every day and we need frequent confession.   8)

Offline WPM

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #25 on: September 25, 2012, 09:04:02 PM »
I can go to confession twice a year and I'm fine.

What?

How do you remember to mention all 6 months worth of sins?

Besides, aren't we taught to Confess our sins no less than four times a year?



If you want sacramental confession 4 times a year that's fine but the minimum is meeting with your priest of choice at least 2-3 times each calendar year.

I'm confused as to what you are saying above.  So, four times for the Sacrament of Confession, if you want.  However, you must meet with your priest 2-3 times a year for non-sacramental confession?  what's that?  You meet over coffee at Starbuck's?



Starbucks? I guess u could  -{internet cafe}- . Most priests I know are too busy to socialize.
« Last Edit: September 25, 2012, 09:04:43 PM by WPM »

Offline Kerdy

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Re: Going to Confession?
« Reply #26 on: September 25, 2012, 11:28:11 PM »
In the Russian tradition confession is part of the prepartion for communion. That means going at least every other week at a minium if you receieve. I don't think that would be any different in a Western Rite ROCOR parish.

I bet if you would randomly take a poll of the average person on the street and asked them " Do you commit sin every day?" I would  hazard a guess that they would say no.  Today we are having a hard time recognizing sin when it is committed.  Some folks would say they never sin.
There is so much painful truth in what you state.  Many people are no longer clear as to what is sinful.  Everything has been whitewashed to a point too much is no longer recognized as wrong and sinful.  It's sad to see so many people endulge in things without that understanding.