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Author Topic: If a young girl is in a "relationship" should you let her parents know?  (Read 3871 times) Average Rating: 0
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NicholasMyra
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« Reply #90 on: August 19, 2012, 02:28:25 AM »

Liza,

I was in no way criticizing your concern for this young girl. It was other comments in this thread I was referring to.
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« Reply #91 on: August 19, 2012, 02:43:40 AM »

since many (most) teenagers people are not capable of making good decisions

Fixed that for you
I'm calling red herring. The subject of this thread is how most teenagers lack wisdom. Stop trying to redirect this.

It isn't a red herring; most teenagers lack wisdom because most human beings lack wisdom.

So, you equate the "wisdom" of a 13 year old with that of a 30 year old?

Really?

Wow.  Are you ever going to be embarrassed if you ever return to these comments in a few years, when you are older,....and hopefully wiser.



I am saying age and wisdom having nothing to do with each other; there are very wise children and quite foolish adults.  One can acquire wisdom as they get older, but getting old has nothing to do with getting wise.  Just look at the story of Job, where the only one of his friends God doesn't rebuke is the one who says:

I am young in years,
    and you are old;
that is why I was fearful,
    not daring to tell you what I know.
I thought, ‘Age should speak;
    advanced years should teach wisdom.’
But it is the spirit in a person,
    the breath of the Almighty, that gives them understanding.
It is not only the old who are wise,
    not only the aged who understand what is right.

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« Reply #92 on: August 19, 2012, 02:43:40 AM »

If adults are so stupid, doesn't it follow that kids are even stupider, given the fact that they are being raised by idiots, but lacking even the experience that those idiots can rely on (even if they don't always act on it; at least they have the option)?


Why would it follow that they are stupider?  At most it would follow that they are equally stupid (which I've not really disagreed with).  If a person, regardless of their age, fails to learn from experience, it is rather pointless to say that they "have the option" of relying on it.
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« Reply #93 on: August 19, 2012, 03:00:10 AM »

No it isn't. That's precisely why, in fact, a 13 year old making a dumb decision is often given much more leeway or compassion in most people's eyes than a 40 year old making the same dumb decision. I mean, if I screw up some facet of my life in a fairly basic and/or spectacular way, nobody will rush to defend me by saying "hey, give him a break -- he's only thirty!" But (adult) people expect kids to do dumb things, because like I wrote in an earlier post, they were kids themselves at one time. So, in a way, being dumb is a part of growing up, and if not exactly a function of age (since we all know immature whatever-year-olds, I'm assuming), there is at least a pretty strong correlation between getting older and learning things, since you will inevitably gain new experience and with it a new perspective, assuming you don't live in a bubble your whole life.

This is all just my way of trying to avoid the whole "you'll understand when you're older" line that used to drive me nuts when I was a child/teenager, but well...I guess the fact that I'm ultimately resorting to it here proves that I learned from the wisdom of my elders about that. They were right, I was not...most everybody realizes this eventually.
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« Reply #94 on: August 19, 2012, 03:03:03 AM »

since many (most) teenagers people are not capable of making good decisions

Fixed that for you
I'm calling red herring. The subject of this thread is how most teenagers lack wisdom. Stop trying to redirect this.

It isn't a red herring; most teenagers lack wisdom because most human beings lack wisdom.

So, you equate the "wisdom" of a 13 year old with that of a 30 year old?

Really?

Wow.  Are you ever going to be embarrassed if you ever return to these comments in a few years, when you are older,....and hopefully wiser.



I am saying age and wisdom having nothing to do with each other;
This is where you are most wrong. With age comes experience, and with experience comes wisdom. An 18-year-old like you cannot possibly have the experience of a 47-year-old like Liza. Maybe when you're 30-something you'll look back at this thread and recognize with the experience and wisdom you acquire by then how foolishly you spoke on this thread.

there are very wise children and quite foolish adults.
There are children who are very wise for their age, but they are still very foolish when compared to the wisest of their elders. There's also a reason we say that the most foolish of adults have not grown up yet: they still think and act like adolescents.

One can acquire wisdom as they get older, but getting old has nothing to do with getting wise.
I think you just showed in this last sentence the fallacy in everything else you've said in this post. One can acquire wisdom as they get older, which is exactly why growing older has everything to do with growing wiser.

Just look at the story of Job, where the only one of his friends God doesn't rebuke is the one who says:

I am young in years,
    and you are old;
that is why I was fearful,
    not daring to tell you what I know.
I thought, ‘Age should speak;
    advanced years should teach wisdom.’
But it is the spirit in a person,
    the breath of the Almighty, that gives them understanding.
It is not only the old who are wise,
    not only the aged who understand what is right.
You do catch the wisdom in this? It isn't the last verse in this excerpt that you need to reread to yourself. It's the one where Elihu explains why he kept silent for so long. "Age should speak; advanced years should teach wisdom." BTW, the absence of any statement in Job that God rebuked Elihu does not mean that God did not rebuke Elihu. It just means that the book of Job does not say one way or the other how God dealt with Elihu.

It is not only the old who are wise,
    not only the aged who understand what is right.
James, it's probably better you think yourself a fool while others think you wise than you think yourself wise while others think you a fool.
« Last Edit: August 19, 2012, 10:52:07 AM by PeterTheAleut » Logged
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« Reply #95 on: August 19, 2012, 03:11:49 AM »

Speak of the devil.
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« Reply #96 on: August 19, 2012, 03:13:02 AM »

since many (most) teenagers people are not capable of making good decisions

Fixed that for you
I'm calling red herring. The subject of this thread is how most teenagers lack wisdom. Stop trying to redirect this.

It isn't a red herring; most teenagers lack wisdom because most human beings lack wisdom.

So, you equate the "wisdom" of a 13 year old with that of a 30 year old?

Really?

Wow.  Are you ever going to be embarrassed if you ever return to these comments in a few years, when you are older,....and hopefully wiser.



Now I am not trying to dismiss what JamesRottnek is saying, but even myself have been embarrased by posts I made a few years back. Maybe I've always been foolish...
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« Reply #97 on: August 19, 2012, 04:27:04 AM »

since many (most) teenagers people are not capable of making good decisions

Fixed that for you
I'm calling red herring. The subject of this thread is how most teenagers lack wisdom. Stop trying to redirect this.

It isn't a red herring; most teenagers lack wisdom because most human beings lack wisdom.

So, you equate the "wisdom" of a 13 year old with that of a 30 year old?

Really?

Wow.  Are you ever going to be embarrassed if you ever return to these comments in a few years, when you are older,....and hopefully wiser.



Now I am not trying to dismiss what JamesRottnek is saying, but even myself have been embarrased by posts I made a few years back. Maybe I've always been foolish...
Same here.
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« Reply #98 on: August 19, 2012, 10:44:26 AM »

Speak of the devil.
I'd rather not if I can avoid it.
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« Reply #99 on: August 19, 2012, 10:48:22 AM »

This young girl must be getting these from somewhere.. Considering that she is a girl I think that her parents should know that she has a boyfriend if they don`t, i`m not saying you should be the one telling them or not.. In the 21st century is not something out of the ordinary to have a gf/bf at the age of 13.. there are probably many kids who have one.. Things evolved, mentalities evolved, kids are much smarter , etc... As someone else said the relationship is probably harmless esp if the boy is at the same age.. My idea is that she is getting these kind of mentality from somewhere more than magazines and probably from someone in her familly.. It's hard to hold to an Orthodox education these days.. In my country which is majoritan Orthodox and no1 in percent Orthodox in the world according to statistics things are the same... Here is what you need to tell her.. You need to tell her that sex outside marriage is a sin and if she starts her sexual life too soon the biggest probabilities are that she would look like 40 when she will be 22 or something like that and that she can have a lot to suffer because of sex.. Guys like 1,2 rides , like girls who give up easy but that`s not really the kind of girls they seek to marry(know what i`m saying) and make a familly with.. Early sexual relationship can affect her psychologically and mark her for life if unpleasent things go along with it, like bad relationships , mockery, etc... Nothing wrong with having a relationship (as she said the bible does not forbid it) but it would be wrong for her to have a sexual relationship and you have the biblical arguments for that and you need to give her examples of women who ruined her lives.. As in front of the class you must tell her that is way too early to be having a bf/gf at this age and that it is very fragile and a very fragile age to be taking beats to the heart but even though that is not good you are not her parent and that depends on her parents.Tell her that the heart hurts more than beating.
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« Reply #100 on: August 19, 2012, 11:48:13 PM »

If adults are so stupid, doesn't it follow that kids are even stupider, given the fact that they are being raised by idiots, but lacking even the experience that those idiots can rely on (even if they don't always act on it; at least they have the option)?



Yes it does follow. Look around you and you will notice how true this is. Visit your local public school sometime.


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