Questions (and non-questions) addressed, in order:
Last year there was not a joint Conference of both AWRV and RWRV. Instead, there was a RWRV Conference with three AWRV priests as guest participants. And of the Antiochian clergy, one (Fr. John Connely) celebrated a Liturgy. So there was fraternal fellowship between AWRV and RWRV but within a specifically RWRV Conference.
No joint RWRV-AWRV conferences are currently planned for the future to my knowledge, although of course we invite one another to our own functions, and so forth.
Regarding the Old Roman Rite Liturgy on Aug. 9, 2012, at the RWRV Conference in New York, which was according to Sarum use:
"1. the Deacon wore the orarium over the dalmatic (as in the Ambrosian Rite oder in the Beneventian Rite, but there in the Eastern way on the left shoulder only)"
This is indeed a documented Roman rite practice. Consult Dr. Rock's "Church of Our Fathers." I forget which volume. But, yes, it is supposed to hang straight. Unfortunately, the tailoring for this could not be completed in time, so the next nearest thing was done.
"2. a Reader wore a tunica/tunicella oder some kind of a dalmatic"
This did not occur.
"3. a dalmatic was coloured (here: red)"
It is quite ordinary in the Roman Rite for the dalmatic to be one color or another. Of course, very anciently, all vestments are said to have been white.
"4. a pax icon was used "
This is a very old usage of the Roman Rite. Other ways of "delivering" the pax to the people are known as well.
There is nothing inaccurate in calling the Sarum "Old Roman Rite." It's definitely Roman and definitely not modern Roman Rite. What about the Sarum is not "Old Roman Rite"? Let's hear it.
There may be some mixing and matching, perhaps--but not in the Sarum Rite of my editions approved for RWRV usage. Mixing and matching was excluded from this particular form. If anyone has a notion that some mixing and matching exists as to this Sarum usage, let's hear what it is, so that the misconception can be corrected.
The "benediction" which was disapproved for RWRV use is the para-liturgical devotion of bringing out the Gifts to show to the people, with the hymns and prayers recently (within the last few hundred years) put together for such a devotion. It does not refer to the showing of the Gifts during a Liturgy, nor to any blessing of the people with the Gfts or chalice during any Liturgy.
I hope this has been good for disambiguation.