Like Colm Chille, I have also followed this forum for a good while now and again like CC, I am also an SSPX'er and have been for 10 years.
Unlike CC, I am a convert to Catholicism, but stayed only a short while in the Novus Ordo church before I became a traddie.
When I read CC's post, it prompted me to write my first post here, particularly since our "stories" are so much alike.
My own affinity for the East and the Orthodox principled view of tradition has been there for several years, but only for the last year or so have I started questioning certain Catholic teachings, particularly the ultramontanism which was so prevalent ( and which the SSPX adheres to in principle) and its culmination, papal infallibility. If this falls...what is left to believe of the particularly Catholc doctrines which differs from Orthodoxy?
The way I see it, is that this doctrine (or the consequences of the doctrine) led to the revolution at VaticanII, since that was backed by a pope and all subsequent popes have praised the "fruits" of VaticanII. Of course, infallibility was not invoked regarding that council, but the psychological consequences of its existence led the whole hierarchy (with a few exceptions, notably archbishop Lefebvre) and most of the faithful into following the revolution.
Furthermore, it was the centralisation of the Catholic Church which made the revolution so easy to pull through. Had the ecclesiology been different, more like the Orthodox, it would not have been possible to revolutionize the whole church so fast, if at all.
In addition, it is today impossible to actually ask "what does the Catholic Church really teach?", because there would be as many answers as there are bishops and priests. Heck, even popes gives answers which are dubious.
Has the church teachings really changed? If so, none of the teachings are true, since truth does not change.
Father Damick's "Orthodoxy and Heterodoxy" has further lead me to question things and I have serious doubts now about the development of doctrine, as described by Cardinal Newman.
Has this teaching led to the whole distaster?
Popes praying with Hindus, Muhammedans and Animists, pagan services in Catholic churches, "dialogue" with B'nai B'rith and Abe Foxman, and popes pray that may St. John the Baptist bless the Quran and the Muhammedan faith....and bishops/cardinals/popes receives "blessings" from pagans, such as JPII received from worshippers of the "Great Thumb" in Benin.
All this devastation has made me doubt the RCC's claims...and now I don't know what to do, except pray and ask for guidance, like CC is doing.