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Author Topic: In defense of sofa scriptura  (Read 496 times) Average Rating: 0
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Jetavan
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« on: May 21, 2012, 10:26:30 AM »

Sofa scriptura is the doctrine that reading the Bible on one's sofa contains all knowledge necessary for salvation and holiness. Consequently, sofa scriptura demands only those doctrines are to be admitted or confessed that are found directly within or indirectly by from scripture as read on one's sofa. However, sofa scriptura is not a denial of other authorities governing Christian life and devotion. Rather, it simply demands that all other authorities are subordinate to, and are to be corrected by, the written word of God as read on your own, personal sofa.
« Last Edit: May 21, 2012, 10:27:00 AM by Jetavan » Logged

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« Reply #1 on: May 21, 2012, 10:48:55 AM »

I will go ahead and be the first to denounce sofa scriptura.  The sofa is the realm of the dog.  The bed is the best place for reading scripture as it is wobbly and the dog prefers a more firm surface.
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« Reply #2 on: May 21, 2012, 12:11:12 PM »

I denounce sofa scriptura, and its spiritual Lutheran father, brewa scriptura...the act of dogmatizing while imbibing large amounts of beer. Very common.

PP
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« Reply #3 on: May 21, 2012, 12:33:18 PM »

I denounce sofa scriptura, and its spiritual Lutheran father, brewa scriptura...the act of dogmatizing while imbibing large amounts of beer. Very common.

PP

I thought that brewa scriptura was Tradition
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« Reply #4 on: May 21, 2012, 12:49:45 PM »

I denounce sofa scriptura, and its spiritual Lutheran father, brewa scriptura...the act of dogmatizing while imbibing large amounts of beer. Very common.

PP

I thought that brewa scriptura was Tradition

brewa scriptura was just one belief held by Christians. Ehrman is currently writing a book on it explaining the diversity of belief in just that one area. But traditional Christians gathered at the Synod of Couch and clearly expressed sofa scriptura as outlined in the original post. This was, of course, merely a reaffirmation of the earlier Diet of Sofa (not to be confused with the heretical and disgusting Diet of Soda, from which beverages of the same name were created by a diabetes activist splinter group). Anyway, so some have argued that our creed should thus be called Sofa-Couch, rather than just Sofa, and that the doctrine is sofa-couch scriptura, rather than just sofa scriptura. The reasons this is not followed are largely semantic and apologetico-rhetoric in nature: sofa scriptura matches nicely against the heresy of soda scriptura, and also, it's just easier to say.

I do applaud, congratulate, send salutations to, and pat on the back Jetavan for broaching this most significant and important and worthy subject.
« Last Edit: May 21, 2012, 12:50:57 PM by Asteriktos » Logged

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« Reply #5 on: May 21, 2012, 12:53:08 PM »

I approve of this thread.
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« Reply #6 on: May 21, 2012, 12:59:00 PM »

I denounce sofa scriptura, and its spiritual Lutheran father, brewa scriptura...the act of dogmatizing while imbibing large amounts of beer. Very common.

PP

I thought that brewa scriptura was Tradition

brewa scriptura was just one belief held by Christians. Ehrman is currently writing a book on it explaining the diversity of belief in just that one area. But traditional Christians gathered at the Synod of Couch and clearly expressed sofa scriptura as outlined in the original post. This was, of course, merely a reaffirmation of the earlier Diet of Sofa (not to be confused with the heretical and disgusting Diet of Soda, from which beverages of the same name were created by a diabetes activist splinter group). Anyway, so some have argued that our creed should thus be called Sofa-Couch, rather than just Sofa, and that the doctrine is sofa-couch scriptura, rather than just sofa scriptura. The reasons this is not followed are largely semantic and apologetico-rhetoric in nature: sofa scriptura matches nicely against the heresy of soda scriptura, and also, it's just easier to say.

I do applaud, congratulate, send salutations to, and pat on the back Jetavan for broaching this most significant and important and worthy subject.

Truly? I must learn more of the Orthoslax Christian way.
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« Reply #7 on: May 21, 2012, 01:03:00 PM »

I denounce sofa scripture.  The Lord has no use for armchair Christians or spiritual couch potatoes (especially in a non-fasting season).
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« Reply #8 on: May 21, 2012, 01:10:53 PM »

Greetings in that Divine and Most Precious Name of Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

I denounce sofa scriptura, and its spiritual Lutheran father, brewa scriptura...the act of dogmatizing while imbibing large amounts of beer. Very common.

PP

But what elsecan Sofa Scripturists do when the game is on?

Let us also not forget, the disciples of the Theological School of the Audience of Hot Seat with Wally George where folks high five salud with their beer cans and neon sun glasses and cross-color tank tops Wink

stay blessed,
habte selassie

« Last Edit: May 21, 2012, 01:11:16 PM by HabteSelassie » Logged

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« Reply #9 on: May 21, 2012, 01:29:19 PM »

I will go ahead and be the first to denounce sofa scriptura.  The sofa is the realm of the dog.  The bed is the best place for reading scripture as it is wobbly and the dog prefers a more firm surface.

I really have to denounce sack scriptura...

Sorry, vamrat.
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« Reply #10 on: May 21, 2012, 01:32:21 PM »

Excellent points, all. The stain of heresy runs deep indeed!!!!

PP
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« Reply #11 on: May 21, 2012, 02:17:22 PM »

I will go ahead and be the first to denounce sofa scriptura.  The sofa is the realm of the dog.  The bed is the best place for reading scripture as it is wobbly and the dog prefers a more firm surface.

I really have to denounce sack scriptura...

Sorry, vamrat.

Rather than judge your brother, you should seek as to why Sack Scriptura does not work?  Is it because you do not maintain the intense levels of asceticism that I do which allows me to read the scripture in bed without the temptation to sleep?  Or perhaps I am being too harsh on you, so forgive me, my beloved sister in Christ.  Perhaps it is a matter that your bed is not as spongey as mine and your dog is capable of jumping on the bed and distracting you from the word of God?
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One day we will talk about why people fetishize children, but for now I'll keep on the side of humanity that doesn't think the height of life is a drinking a juice box and eating a tater tot while defecating in their pants.
primuspilus
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« Reply #12 on: May 21, 2012, 02:22:59 PM »

I will go ahead and be the first to denounce sofa scriptura.  The sofa is the realm of the dog.  The bed is the best place for reading scripture as it is wobbly and the dog prefers a more firm surface.

I really have to denounce sack scriptura...

Sorry, vamrat.

Rather than judge your brother, you should seek as to why Sack Scriptura does not work?  Is it because you do not maintain the intense levels of asceticism that I do which allows me to read the scripture in bed without the temptation to sleep?  Or perhaps I am being too harsh on you, so forgive me, my beloved sister in Christ.  Perhaps it is a matter that your bed is not as spongey as mine and your dog is capable of jumping on the bed and distracting you from the word of God?
QFT baby.

PP
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« Reply #13 on: May 21, 2012, 05:03:05 PM »

I will go ahead and be the first to denounce sofa scriptura.  The sofa is the realm of the dog.  The bed is the best place for reading scripture as it is wobbly and the dog prefers a more firm surface.

I really have to denounce sack scriptura...

Sorry, vamrat.

Rather than judge your brother, you should seek as to why Sack Scriptura does not work?  Is it because you do not maintain the intense levels of asceticism that I do which allows me to read the scripture in bed without the temptation to sleep?  Or perhaps I am being too harsh on you, so forgive me, my beloved sister in Christ.  Perhaps it is a matter that your bed is not as spongey as mine and your dog is capable of jumping on the bed and distracting you from the word of God?

So, you're recommending I figure out what is distracting me in the sack?  Cheesy
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« Reply #14 on: May 21, 2012, 07:37:19 PM »

Quote
The sofa is the realm of the dog cat. So is the bed.
Fixed it for ya.  laugh
« Last Edit: May 21, 2012, 07:38:06 PM by LBK » Logged
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