Welcome to the forum Jack2012!
It seems to me that your biggest issue is with the "ethnic" element you are encountering within Orthodoxy in the United States.
This particular situation only exists in the U.S. In other words in Romania, everyone is Romanian and has no issues speaking Romanian, and having Romanian festivals. Same in Greece, Ukraine, Russia, Serbia, etc.
America is a melting pot of peoples.
On one hand you find this to be a limitation, and almost a hindrance to your growth within Orthodoxy.
On the other hand, you should be grateful for these "ethnic" parishes....for it is exactly these "foreign" people who brought Orthodoxy to your doorstep. Had they not, you would only have been reading about it in books....not seeing it and living it.
Certainly, each parish will reflect the homeland of the people who came here, preserved their faith, and built their church.
Why not approach it as a "plus". I think it's rather cool learning everyone's customs and traditions.
Remember, the Faith is the same....the languages might be different, the people might look different, the food might taste different....but, the Faith is NOT different.
Unless you are an Native American (Indian), even your roots come from foreign lands. Embrace the differences, for these are all God's people...many flavors of His design.
Once again, welcome to the forum from a Ukrainian American.
PS. We have many churches in the UOC that only serve in English for our non-Ukrainian faithful.