Author Topic: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book  (Read 2029 times)

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Offline Jetavan

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by Mark Driscoll

Quote
You try to write a book on marriage and sex with your wife and next thing you know there are a lot of ants crashing your picnic.

My wife, Grace, and I recently published "Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, & Life Together," which quickly became a No. 1 New York Times best-seller.
....
We knew before we wrote the book that we’d catch a lot of flak, especially on the chapters dealing with sex. We also knew the criticism would come from every direction, as some people would think we went too far and others would think we didn’t go far enough.

But we wrote it anyway. Why? Simply put, we want to help marriages — and single people aspiring to marry — and we wanted to do so in a way that is practical, biblical and applicable to the reality of today’s culture.

If the book accomplishes that, we’ll take the criticism in exchange for helping people. We don’t think our book is perfect and we tell folks upfront (literally in the preface) to take what is helpful and leave the rest.

The book identifies three ways people tend to view sex: as gross, as a god and as a gift.
« Last Edit: January 25, 2012, 02:15:14 AM by Jetavan »
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Offline FormerReformer

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by Mark Driscoll

Quote
You try to write a book on marriage and sex with your wife and next thing you know there are a lot of ants crashing your picnic.

My wife, Grace, and I recently published "Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, & Life Together," which quickly became a No. 1 New York Times best-seller.
....
We knew before we wrote the book that we’d catch a lot of flak, especially on the chapters dealing with sex. We also knew the criticism would come from every direction, as some people would think we went too far and others would think we didn’t go far enough.

But we wrote it anyway. Why? Simply put, we want to help marriages — and single people aspiring to marry — and we wanted to do so in a way that is practical, biblical and applicable to the reality of today’s culture.

If the book accomplishes that, we’ll take the criticism in exchange for helping people. We don’t think our book is perfect and we tell folks upfront (literally in the preface) to take what is helpful and leave the rest.

The book identifies three ways people tend to view sex: as gross, as a god and as a gift.

*yawn* Tim LaHaye did the whole "marriage book co-authored by wife with explicit detailed information on how to have sex" back in the late 70s or early 80s. Driscoll's boring me here.
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Offline Agabus

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by Mark Driscoll

Quote
You try to write a book on marriage and sex with your wife and next thing you know there are a lot of ants crashing your picnic.

My wife, Grace, and I recently published "Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, & Life Together," which quickly became a No. 1 New York Times best-seller.
....
We knew before we wrote the book that we’d catch a lot of flak, especially on the chapters dealing with sex. We also knew the criticism would come from every direction, as some people would think we went too far and others would think we didn’t go far enough.

But we wrote it anyway. Why? Simply put, we want to help marriages — and single people aspiring to marry — and we wanted to do so in a way that is practical, biblical and applicable to the reality of today’s culture.

If the book accomplishes that, we’ll take the criticism in exchange for helping people. We don’t think our book is perfect and we tell folks upfront (literally in the preface) to take what is helpful and leave the rest.

The book identifies three ways people tend to view sex: as gross, as a god and as a gift.

*yawn* Tim LaHaye did the whole "marriage book co-authored by wife with explicit detailed information on how to have sex" back in the late 70s or early 80s. Driscoll's boring me here.
Yeah, Mark left out the chapter about what to do if the rapture happens during lovemaking.
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Offline Νεκτάριος

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Yeah, Mark left out the chapter about what to do if the rapture happens during lovemaking.

Ultimate case of blue...

Offline Timon

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Yeah, Mark left out the chapter about what to do if the rapture happens during lovemaking.

Ultimate case of blue...

haha!
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Offline podkarpatska

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Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.

Offline Timon

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Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.

Thats a good point.  Driscoll is a mega church pastor based out of Seattle.  But the reason people care is that some of his teaching could be rather dangerous, and because most of the time he comes across as a complete jerk.  I havent met him, but thats the vibe most people seem to pick up.
Even if we have thousands of acts of great virtue to our credit, our confidence in being heard must be based on God's mercy and His love for men. Even if we stand at the very summit of virtue, it is by mercy that we shall be saved.

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Offline LBK

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Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.

Last time I checked, neither metropolitan had written a sex and marriage manual. ;)
Am I posting? Or is it Schroedinger's Cat?

Offline primuspilus

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Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.

Last time I checked, neither metropolitan had written a sex and marriage manual. ;)
Wow, thats an image I'd rather not have burned into my mind.......

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Offline podkarpatska

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Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.

Last time I checked, neither metropolitan had written a sex and marriage manual. ;)
Wow, thats an image I'd rather not have burned into my mind.......

PP

yuck.....Sounds like a great Monty Python type skit though.... ;D

Offline primuspilus

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #10 on: January 25, 2012, 12:19:52 PM »
Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.

Last time I checked, neither metropolitan had written a sex and marriage manual. ;)
Wow, thats an image I'd rather not have burned into my mind.......

PP

yuck.....Sounds like a great Monty Python type skit though.... ;D
Man oh man, that would be alot of bearded nastiness....yeah...I just died a little inside....

PP
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Offline yeshuaisiam

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #11 on: January 25, 2012, 04:03:12 PM »
by Mark Driscoll

Quote
You try to write a book on marriage and sex with your wife and next thing you know there are a lot of ants crashing your picnic.

My wife, Grace, and I recently published "Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, & Life Together," which quickly became a No. 1 New York Times best-seller.
....
We knew before we wrote the book that we’d catch a lot of flak, especially on the chapters dealing with sex. We also knew the criticism would come from every direction, as some people would think we went too far and others would think we didn’t go far enough.

But we wrote it anyway. Why? Simply put, we want to help marriages — and single people aspiring to marry — and we wanted to do so in a way that is practical, biblical and applicable to the reality of today’s culture.

If the book accomplishes that, we’ll take the criticism in exchange for helping people. We don’t think our book is perfect and we tell folks upfront (literally in the preface) to take what is helpful and leave the rest.

The book identifies three ways people tend to view sex: as gross, as a god and as a gift.

It's amazing how the scriptures quote to be modest, yet so many Christians will accept a marriage sex book. 
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Offline Agabus

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #12 on: January 25, 2012, 09:22:18 PM »
Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.
Driscoll is on my radar because some dear friends drink regularly at his well.

Otherwise, I would only know of him as the "cussing pastor."
Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

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Offline Volnutt

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #13 on: January 25, 2012, 09:34:52 PM »
Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.
Driscoll is on my radar because some dear friends drink regularly at his well.

Otherwise, I would only know of him as the "cussing pastor."
I thought he dropped the cussing.

Offline Agabus

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #14 on: January 25, 2012, 11:17:01 PM »
Sounding like a parochial ignoramous, I have to ask who is this Driscoll fellow and why do so many of you care about what he has written or done? I doubt that Protestant boards have running commentaries on Metropolitans Kallistos Ware or Anthony Bloom.
Driscoll is on my radar because some dear friends drink regularly at his well.

Otherwise, I would only know of him as the "cussing pastor."
I thought he dropped the cussing.
Guess I'm outta the loop.
Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

THE OPINIONS HERE MAY NOT REFLECT THE ACTUAL OR PERCEIVED ORTHODOX CHURCH

Offline Riddikulus

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #15 on: January 25, 2012, 11:29:41 PM »
by Mark Driscoll

Quote
You try to write a book on marriage and sex with your wife and next thing you know there are a lot of ants crashing your picnic.

My wife, Grace, and I recently published "Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, & Life Together," which quickly became a No. 1 New York Times best-seller.
....
We knew before we wrote the book that we’d catch a lot of flak, especially on the chapters dealing with sex. We also knew the criticism would come from every direction, as some people would think we went too far and others would think we didn’t go far enough.

But we wrote it anyway. Why? Simply put, we want to help marriages — and single people aspiring to marry — and we wanted to do so in a way that is practical, biblical and applicable to the reality of today’s culture.

If the book accomplishes that, we’ll take the criticism in exchange for helping people. We don’t think our book is perfect and we tell folks upfront (literally in the preface) to take what is helpful and leave the rest.

The book identifies three ways people tend to view sex: as gross, as a god and as a gift.

*yawn* Tim LaHaye did the whole "marriage book co-authored by wife with explicit detailed information on how to have sex" back in the late 70s or early 80s. Driscoll's boring me here.
Yeah, Mark left out the chapter about what to do if the rapture happens during lovemaking.

I thought rapture was the point of lovemaking?  ;)
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Offline Jetavan

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #16 on: December 06, 2012, 11:52:45 AM »
Driscoll and "Twilight" and sex:

Quote
The release of Breaking Dawn Part 2, the final movie in the Twilight series, has brought with it what I suspect is the last flurry of Christian reaction to the popularity of the books and films. Mars Hill pastor Mark Driscoll, in a recent blog post titled “A Father’s Fright of Twilight,” describes the series as “for teenage girls what porn is to teenage boys: sick, twisted, evil, dangerous, deceptive, and popular.” Driscoll goes on to highlight news stories about Twilight-crazed teenagers participating in real-life vampirism. He calls for discernment and regrets that Christian parents “naively” allow “this filth” into their children’s lives.

I share Driscoll’s concern about Twilight. But I diagnose the problem with the series very differently. The differences in our diagnoses are intertwined with the very different ways that Driscoll and I think about gender. Twilight is aimed at girls, and because it appeals so deeply to so many girls and women, the problem with Twilight is a problem about gender. My deeply felt worry is that the ideas about gender that Driscoll advocates publicly are actually the same ideas that fuel the Twilight phenomenon.
If you will, you can become all flame.
Extra caritatem nulla salus.
In order to become whole, take the "I" out of "holiness".
सर्वभूतहित
Ἄνω σχῶμεν τὰς καρδίας
"Those who say religion has nothing to do with politics do not know what religion is." -- Mohandas Gandhi
Y dduw bo'r diolch.

Online ialmisry

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #17 on: December 06, 2012, 12:24:44 PM »
Driscoll and "Twilight" and sex:

Quote
The release of Breaking Dawn Part 2, the final movie in the Twilight series, has brought with it what I suspect is the last flurry of Christian reaction to the popularity of the books and films. Mars Hill pastor Mark Driscoll, in a recent blog post titled “A Father’s Fright of Twilight,” describes the series as “for teenage girls what porn is to teenage boys: sick, twisted, evil, dangerous, deceptive, and popular.” Driscoll goes on to highlight news stories about Twilight-crazed teenagers participating in real-life vampirism. He calls for discernment and regrets that Christian parents “naively” allow “this filth” into their children’s lives.

I share Driscoll’s concern about Twilight. But I diagnose the problem with the series very differently. The differences in our diagnoses are intertwined with the very different ways that Driscoll and I think about gender. Twilight is aimed at girls, and because it appeals so deeply to so many girls and women, the problem with Twilight is a problem about gender. My deeply felt worry is that the ideas about gender that Driscoll advocates publicly are actually the same ideas that fuel the Twilight phenomenon.

Quote
I have written about Twilight—for teenagers, youth leaders, and parents—in my book Touched by a Vampire (a leader’s guide is available for download here), and I wrote with the hope of helping the church to think biblically and faithfully about the themes in the story. My advice, for Christians thinking about this vampire romance, is modest but also hopeful. We should try to feed the godly dreams of our daughters—and our sons—not dreams about finding fulfillment in the “the one,” but dreams about serving Christ as Lord and using all the talents we are given in love and witness for the kingdom. Rather than encouraging our daughters to wait for their Edward, we should encourage them to find satisfaction in their Savior.
http://blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2012/12/why-mark-driscoll-is-wrong-abo.html
So they are all supposed to be nuns?
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Offline vamrat

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #18 on: December 06, 2012, 12:43:38 PM »
A bit behind the times, aren't they?  Twilight is so 2008.  The new thing is 50 Shades of Gay.  And even this discussion is a bit dated.

BTW, you guys REALLY don't want to know about what the next big thing is.  I heard through the grapevine that some stay-at-home-mom just wrote a modern adaption of Peter Rabbit and Squirrel Nutkin, except this one has Furries and Mr. Lemmiwinks. 
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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #19 on: December 06, 2012, 12:46:37 PM »
A bit behind the times, aren't they?  Twilight is so 2008.  The new thing is 50 Shades of Gay.  And even this discussion is a bit dated.

BTW, you guys REALLY don't want to know about what the next big thing is.  I heard through the grapevine that some stay-at-home-mom just wrote a modern adaption of Peter Rabbit and Squirrel Nutkin, except this one has Furries and Mr. Lemmiwinks. 
bestiality, here we come?
Question a friend, perhaps he did not do it; but if he did anything so that he may do it no more.
A hasty quarrel kindles fire,
and urgent strife sheds blood.
If you blow on a spark, it will glow;
if you spit on it, it will be put out;
                           and both come out of your mouth

Offline Jetavan

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #20 on: December 06, 2012, 12:52:40 PM »
Driscoll and "Twilight" and sex:

Quote
The release of Breaking Dawn Part 2, the final movie in the Twilight series, has brought with it what I suspect is the last flurry of Christian reaction to the popularity of the books and films. Mars Hill pastor Mark Driscoll, in a recent blog post titled “A Father’s Fright of Twilight,” describes the series as “for teenage girls what porn is to teenage boys: sick, twisted, evil, dangerous, deceptive, and popular.” Driscoll goes on to highlight news stories about Twilight-crazed teenagers participating in real-life vampirism. He calls for discernment and regrets that Christian parents “naively” allow “this filth” into their children’s lives.

I share Driscoll’s concern about Twilight. But I diagnose the problem with the series very differently. The differences in our diagnoses are intertwined with the very different ways that Driscoll and I think about gender. Twilight is aimed at girls, and because it appeals so deeply to so many girls and women, the problem with Twilight is a problem about gender. My deeply felt worry is that the ideas about gender that Driscoll advocates publicly are actually the same ideas that fuel the Twilight phenomenon.

Quote
I have written about Twilight—for teenagers, youth leaders, and parents—in my book Touched by a Vampire (a leader’s guide is available for download here), and I wrote with the hope of helping the church to think biblically and faithfully about the themes in the story. My advice, for Christians thinking about this vampire romance, is modest but also hopeful. We should try to feed the godly dreams of our daughters—and our sons—not dreams about finding fulfillment in the “the one,” but dreams about serving Christ as Lord and using all the talents we are given in love and witness for the kingdom. Rather than encouraging our daughters to wait for their Edward, we should encourage them to find satisfaction in their Savior.
http://blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2012/12/why-mark-driscoll-is-wrong-abo.html
So they are all supposed to be nuns?
The desire to totally dedicate oneself as a bride of Christ, has been suppressed by Protestants for centuries. It's hard to suppress that desire forever.
If you will, you can become all flame.
Extra caritatem nulla salus.
In order to become whole, take the "I" out of "holiness".
सर्वभूतहित
Ἄνω σχῶμεν τὰς καρδίας
"Those who say religion has nothing to do with politics do not know what religion is." -- Mohandas Gandhi
Y dduw bo'r diolch.

Offline NicholasMyra

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #21 on: December 06, 2012, 01:11:19 PM »
Read blog title

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« Last Edit: December 06, 2012, 01:11:39 PM by NicholasMyra »
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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #22 on: December 06, 2012, 01:14:30 PM »
Driscoll and "Twilight" and sex:

Quote
The release of Breaking Dawn Part 2, the final movie in the Twilight series, has brought with it what I suspect is the last flurry of Christian reaction to the popularity of the books and films. Mars Hill pastor Mark Driscoll, in a recent blog post titled “A Father’s Fright of Twilight,” describes the series as “for teenage girls what porn is to teenage boys: sick, twisted, evil, dangerous, deceptive, and popular.” Driscoll goes on to highlight news stories about Twilight-crazed teenagers participating in real-life vampirism. He calls for discernment and regrets that Christian parents “naively” allow “this filth” into their children’s lives.

I share Driscoll’s concern about Twilight. But I diagnose the problem with the series very differently. The differences in our diagnoses are intertwined with the very different ways that Driscoll and I think about gender. Twilight is aimed at girls, and because it appeals so deeply to so many girls and women, the problem with Twilight is a problem about gender. My deeply felt worry is that the ideas about gender that Driscoll advocates publicly are actually the same ideas that fuel the Twilight phenomenon.

Quote
I have written about Twilight—for teenagers, youth leaders, and parents—in my book Touched by a Vampire (a leader’s guide is available for download here), and I wrote with the hope of helping the church to think biblically and faithfully about the themes in the story. My advice, for Christians thinking about this vampire romance, is modest but also hopeful. We should try to feed the godly dreams of our daughters—and our sons—not dreams about finding fulfillment in the “the one,” but dreams about serving Christ as Lord and using all the talents we are given in love and witness for the kingdom. Rather than encouraging our daughters to wait for their Edward, we should encourage them to find satisfaction in their Savior.
http://blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2012/12/why-mark-driscoll-is-wrong-abo.html
So they are all supposed to be nuns?
The desire to totally dedicate oneself as a bride of Christ, has been suppressed by Protestants for centuries. It's hard to suppress that desire forever.
so they can go the way of the protestant Shakers.
Question a friend, perhaps he did not do it; but if he did anything so that he may do it no more.
A hasty quarrel kindles fire,
and urgent strife sheds blood.
If you blow on a spark, it will glow;
if you spit on it, it will be put out;
                           and both come out of your mouth

Offline Agabus

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Re: My take: Why Christians are criticizing my Christian marriage and sex book
« Reply #23 on: December 06, 2012, 01:21:33 PM »
A bit behind the times, aren't they?  Twilight is so 2008.  The new thing is 50 Shades of Gay.  And even this discussion is a bit dated.
New Twilight movie. All the middle-aged ladies are a twitter. Some youth will see it, and this is mistaken for a youth obsession. Christians who seek to respond to pop culture usually have a lag time because they're not as connected as they think.

But 50 Shades is a bastard child of Twlight, so really it ties in and feeds the new/old not-sensation. Snake eating its tail, I guess.

Blessed Nazarius practiced the ascetic life. His clothes were tattered. He wore his shoes without removing them for six years.

THE OPINIONS HERE MAY NOT REFLECT THE ACTUAL OR PERCEIVED ORTHODOX CHURCH