Greetings in that Divine and Most Precious Name of Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!
Some people should not speak on matters unless they have been through something like this. I'll leave you with this it is a sin to kill one self knowingly.
True, but you should be careful in assuming exactly who has what experiences with what then, folks may have experiences with this that they are uncomfortable discussing directly, but still have relevant advice to share. This is not my confession by the way, my first-hand experiences are with miscarriage, not abortion, but considering the sensitivity of this issue, we shouldn't assume others who are speaking may not have formed their opinions strictly from speculation.
I'm having a discussion with someone on this. Is there any situation where abortion is ever not the wrong choice, such as if needed to save the mother's life (as rare as this is)?
No, abortion is simply never warranted, under absolutely ANY circumstances, period. If there is a complication of health, either to the baby or the mother, these are matters which we as Christians need to take to God to understand. The Church has instituted the Divine Mystery of the Unction of the Sick entirely to demonstrate this fact, that our health is a matter beyond our control sometimes, and is a tangible expression of the overpowering Will of God in our lives. What God wills, we can not change. If God wills our children born or unborn to have health problems, that is that. If God wills mothers to die during delivery that is. We can do things in a reactionary way to help these problems, such as improving prenatal and neonatal medical care, but a preemptive strike abortion is a cop-out, like euthanasia in the face of a terminal disease. God has given us the terminal diseases to learn something about ourselves and our relationship with Him, and to simply cut out early and kill one's self is to avoid the task given by God just as Jonah fled and found himself in the belly of the fish. We must turn to God in these matters, all the more. Further, abortion is a silly waste of time. Some studies show that as many as 9 out of 10 women who get abortions express deep regret and sometimes have long term symptoms of guilt and depression, and this is a biological matter of the hormones and neurochemistry of human pregnancy, let alone the psychological and social factors.
"Sickness in particular accentuates the fact THAT WE DO NOT CONTROL OUR OWN LIVES. If when we get sick, we respond by trying to grab even more rigid control of our lives, we are bound to fail.. We are potentially able to deepen our awareness of God, our dependence on Him, and our desire to seek His will.. In sickness we learn to depend upon others, even though we would prefer to be independent. The fact that we learn to be dependent at all (something we usually shrug off as childlike, if not childish) HELPS US DEVELOP OR RELEARN A SENSE OF DEPENDENCE ON GOD.. The sick person, from a place of powerlessness, still has to learn to trust and to allow himself or herself to receive the available healing, no matter what happens.. Asking for a healing, we surrender to God. In the Mystery of the Anointing of the Sick, there is a strong awareness on behalf of the Church that the sick person is in the hands of God, and that God will provide the healing."
Father Meletios Webber Bread and Water, Wine and Oil.
An abortion for medical reasons is an attempt to trump God's message through the illness, and attempt at human beings to more rigidly grab towards control, and as Father Meletios mentioned, are often times more doomed to fail. Illness teaches us our dependence on God, and so if a woman or her unborn child are ill or sick, then it is the same. Even if it is just an abortion out of "convenience" or fear of the unknown, that is the same cop-out. God gives us life, God gives us pregnancy (this is a fact because a lot of us have had a lot of sex in our lives and yet do not have children from every single sexual encounter, so we have firsthand experience as to God's synergy in action with our sexuality to bring new life into our world). Pregnancy is always a challenge, physically, emotionally, economically, and it always has been. In this regard, even a healthy pregnancy is similar to illness in that it teaches human beings their dependence on God. Who will provide the food and resources? Who will ensure the pregnancy and birth are healthy without complications? Only God alone can really help us through this, and guide our lives in His Will. If God has sent us the life in our wombs, then God will also send the increase and success. Further, miscarriage is the opposite side of that coin, showing that God does not always bless our sexual unions, even those which cause a pregnancy, to bring new life into His world.
The moral, it is ALWAYS God's world, and we as humans need to learn in every breath and step to accept, embrace, and endure this reality-check.