i went back to pot. smoked everyday from thursday-to monday. i was in jersey from thursday to sunday and my cuzins and i smoked a lot. wen i got back, i had work the next day. i ended up QUITTING MY JOB because i was still high from the smoking the few days before and didnt want to do any work...i also got drunk and high the night i quit. i puked 4 times (twice in my room). i wasted all my money on the drugs...now i am in debt (about 40 bucks in debt), i freaked out on my friend cuz he wouldnt get me high, my parents dont know any of this...i also have to pay a speeding ticket this week (i will barely have enough money to pay it, im getting my last paycheck thursday)
im so screwed
i need help...im only 18 and my life is screwed
what am i supposed to do? im so lost!
Wow, what advice can I possibly tell you. Let me let you walk in my shoes for a day.
1) Wake up 6am
2) Shower under the solar water heated water that I built still warm from the day before
3) Get dressed as quickly as possible & hygene etc.
4) Call kids downstairs (all 5 of them)
5) Cut them some fresh home made wheat bread & honey - put on laundry & dishes
6) Take all the organic superfoods
7) Run upstairs to the office / classroom
Fire up the main server while wife is eating with the kids
9) Call kids up and have them PXE boot into the server
10) Wife comes in and starts homeschooling them while I work.
11) Work till lunch. Wife teaches the kids till lunch.
12) Run downstairs and make lunch ( a chef is an alter ego of mine). This is lunch for 7 people. Fresh everything including having to slice bread.
13) Eat lunch - then exchange dishes & laundry, have kids line dry clothes
14) Run back up stairs and start working till 3pm. Kids come up and start doing school.
15) Run down at 3pm. Start prepping dinner & heating the solar oven. Get dinner & new bread cooking for next day.
16) Set table, give thanks, eat dinner, tell kids to do chores
17) Family time, reading, story telling, bible stories, bible trivia etc.
18) Get kids ready for bed.
19) Get kids ready for bed some more (we are working on this LOL)
20) Final chores of the day. Desserts, bedtime, final cleaning, maint...
Okay that's all just a rough outline. I don't mention all the oddball stuff like keeping track of kids rooms & how clean they keep them, raising them in Christ, what size clothing did they need, son needs shoes again??, wife sewing dresses, lawn maint, car maint, house maint, paint, plumbing, keeping chickens.... Trust me I can go on.
My point to this - It hurts me to hear you do that. Get stoned, drunk, puke, debt, quit.
I'm not perfect. My life is crazy in many ways. Heck I'm known a lot around here is somebody with "deep Orthodox faith issues". Still though, my friend, STRAIGHTEN UP.
Girls your age are seeking men. Real men. Men who will be with them forever and who have it together. You are 18 now. Learn a good trade if you don't know what else to do. A/C repair, furnace repair, truck driving, carpet cleaning, painting. Learn, learn and keep LEARNING. Marry a strong Christian woman who will let you lead her through life as Christ leads you.
Forget any more drugs. Forget alcohol. Honor the TEMPLE of the HOLY SPIRIT! Eat superfoods (youtube them). Become healthy. Strive to keep yourself in good shape and disciplined Christ centered mind so that God will guide you to do his work forever.
Satan wants to drag us all down to hell. trust me I know. I was moshing at Pantera concerts at 18. I was near people all the time smoking pot, drinking, and doing drugs. (never did them myself though). But still my mind was twisted by the music and modernism of everything.
Change now. Pray for change. Don't let any peer pressure affect you any more. Remember each sin is striking Christ. Remember that hurting your body is blaspheming your temple.