Author Topic: Wonderful new Biblical translations  (Read 6169 times)

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Offline hecma925

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #90 on: March 26, 2015, 07:30:24 AM »
Philippians 1:29

Original text:

"For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:


"Oh, no, you don't have to believe it's only on their own behalf."
Happy shall he be, that shall take and dash thy little ones against the rock. Alleluia.

Once Christ has filled the Cross, it can never be empty again.

"But God doesn't need your cookies!  Arrive on time!"

Offline Asteriktos

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #91 on: March 27, 2015, 12:14:48 AM »
Ps. 2:1-5

Original text:
Why do the heathen rage, and the people imagine a vain thing? The kings of the earth set themselves, and the rulers take counsel together, against the Lord, and against his anointed, saying, Let us break their bands asunder, and cast away their cords from us. He that sitteth in the heavens shall laugh: the Lord shall have them in derision. Then shall he speak unto them in his wrath, and vex them in his sore displeasure.

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
Useless anger? King materials, web pages, or together against the Lord, senate. His father, however,language in the rest of the list, there is still the risk of being sick, it's a God up in the sky and we sat on the attraction, he said. If you do this, so, if, hatred, anger, resentment, jealousy.

Offline hecma925

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #92 on: March 28, 2015, 02:20:54 AM »
Hebrews 9:24

Original text:

"For Christ has not entered the holy places made with hands, which are copies of the true, but into heaven itself, now to appear in the presence of God for us;"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"X is the work of God in the Temple of God in heaven, when you can't understand it, but just."
Happy shall he be, that shall take and dash thy little ones against the rock. Alleluia.

Once Christ has filled the Cross, it can never be empty again.

"But God doesn't need your cookies!  Arrive on time!"

Offline Asteriktos

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #93 on: March 28, 2015, 02:41:19 AM »
Matt. 7:12

Original text:
Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
Okay ,ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ this is the law and the prophets,and women.

Here is the entire, glorious sequence:

Quote
From English: Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.
To Arabic: لذلك كل شيء على الإطلاق تريدون أن الرجال ينبغي أن لا لكم, هل انتم حتى لهم: هذه هي الشريعة والأنبياء.
Back to English: Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.
To Armenian: Հետեւաբար, այն ամենն, ինչին էլ պետք է լիներ, որ տղամարդիկ պետք է անենք, որպեսզի դուք, մի ՞ թե դուք այդքան է նրանց հետ, որովհետեւ այս է օրենքը եւ մարգարեները.
Back to English: Consequently, all the things that should not have been that men should do to you, do ye so to them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Azerbaijani: Buna görə də, hər nə ki, yox idi ki, kişilər etmək üçün siz, doğrudanmı, siz elə onlarla; çünki bu qanun və peyğəmbərlər.
Back to English: Therefore, things that no man, to you, do ye so to them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Belarusian: Таму рэчы, якія ні адзін чалавек, да вас, няўжо вы так зь імі; бо ў гэтым закон і прарокі.
Back to English: So things that no one person, up to you, do ye so to them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Bosnian: Tako stvari koje niko ne osoba, da ti, da li vi tako da ih; za ovo je zakon i proroci.
Back to English: So things that no one person, to you, to you so to them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Bulgarian: Така че неща, които нито един човек, да, да ти си е наред с тях; защото това е законът и пророците.
Back to English: So things that no man, yeah, yeah you with them; for in this law and the prophets.
To Catalan: Així que les coses que cap home, sí, sí que amb ells; per a aquesta llei i els profetes.
Back to English: So things that no man, yes, yes you with them; for in this law and the prophets.
To Chinese: 那些没有男人,是的,是的,你和他们;因为在这一法律和先知的。
Back to English: That no man, yeah, yeah, you and them; for in this law and the prophets.
To Croatian: Da niti jedan muškarac, da, da, i vi s njima; jer to je zakon i proroci.
Back to English: That no man, yeah, yeah and you with them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Czech: Že žádný člověk, jo, jo a vy s nimi; neboť to je zákon a proroci.
Back to English: That no man, yeah, yeah and you with them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Danish: At ingen mand, yeah, yeah, og du med dem; for dette er loven og profeterne.
Back to English: That no man, yeah, yeah and you with them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Dutch: Dat geen mens, ja, ja, en u met hen niet; want dit is de wet en de profeten.
Back to English: That no man, yes, yes, and you with them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Estonian: Et ükski inimene, jah, jah, ja siis neile; sest see on käsuõpetus ja prohvetid.
Back to English: That no man, yes, yes, and then to them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Finnish: Että ei mies, kyllä, kyllä, ja sitten heille; sillä tämä on laki ja profeetat.
Back to English: That is the man, yes, yes, and then to them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To French: Qui est l'homme, oui, oui, et puis à eux; car c'est la loi et les prophètes.
Back to English: Who is the man, yes, yes, and then to them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Georgian: ვინ არის კაცი, დიახ, დიახ, და ამის შემდეგ მათ; ეს არის კანონი და წინასწარმეტყველთა.
Back to English: Who is the man, Yes, Yes, and then them; for this is the law and the prophets.
To German: Wer ist der Mann, ja, ja, und dann Sie; denn dies ist das Gesetz und die Propheten.
Back to English: Who is the man, Yes, Yes, and then you; for this is the law and the prophets.
To Greek: Ποιος είναι ο άνθρωπος, Ναι, Ναι, και στη συνέχεια, γιατί αυτός είναι ο νόμος και οι προφήτες.
Back to English: Who is the man, Yes, Yes, and then, because this is the law and the prophets.
To Hebrew: מי הוא האיש, כן, כן, אז, כי זה החוק והנביאים.
Back to English: Who is the man, yeah, yeah, so, that it is the law and the prophets.
To Hungarian: Ki az az ember, igen, igen, igen, igen, igen, igen, így, hogy a törvényt vagy a prófétákat.
Back to English: The man, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, so, that is the law and the prophets.
To Icelandic: Maðurinn, já, já, já, já, já, já, jæja, það eru lögin og prophets.
Back to English: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, it is the law and the prophets.
To Indonesian: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, itu adalah hukum dan nabi.
Back to English: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, that is the law and the prophets.
To Italian: L'uomo, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, bene, che è la legge e i profeti.
Back to English: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, that is the law and the prophets.
To Latvian: Cilvēks, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, labi, ka ir bauslība un pravieši.
Back to English: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, that is the law and the prophets.
To Lithuanian: Žmogus, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, gerai, kad yra įstatymas ir pranašai.
Back to English: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, that is the law and the prophets.
To Macedonian: Човекот, је, је, је, је, је, је, добро, тоа е законот и пророците.
Back to English: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, it is the law and the prophets.
To Malay: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, itu adalah hukum dan para nabi.
Back to English: Man, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, that is the law and the prophets.
To Maltese: - Bniedem, iva, iva, iva, iva, iva, iva, ukoll, li hija l-liġi u l-prophets.
Back to English: Human, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, well, that is the law and the prophets.
To Norwegian: Menneske, ja, ja, ja, ja, ja, ja, vel, det er loven og profetene.
Back to English: Human, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, well, it is the law and the prophets.
To Polish: Osoby, tak, tak, tak, tak, tak, tak, no cóż, takie jest prawo i prorocy.
Back to English: Individuals, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, well, this is the law and the prophets.
To Portuguese: Indivíduos, Sim, Sim, Sim, Sim, Sim, Sim, bem, esta é a lei e os profetas.
Back to English: Individuals, Yes, yes, Yes, yes, Yes, Yes, well, this is the law and the prophets.
To Romanian: Fata, Da, da, da, da, da, da, ei bine, în aceasta este cuprinsă legea și proorocii.
Back to English: Girl, yeah, Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, this is the law and the prophets.
To Russian: Девушка, да, да, да, да, да, да, ну, в этом закон и пророки.
Back to English: Girl, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, this is the law and the prophets.
To Serbian: Девојка, да, да, да, да, да, да, па, у томе је закон и пророци.
Back to English: Girl, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, this is the law and the prophets.
To Slovak: Dievča, jo, jo, jo, jo, jo, jo, dobre, to je zákon i proroci.
Back to English: Girl, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, this is the law and the prophets.
To Slovenian: Dekle, ja, ja, ja, ja, ja, ja, ja, to je postava in preroki.
Back to English: Girl, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, this is the law and the prophets.
To Spanish: Chica, sí, sí, sí, sí, sí, sí, sí, esto es la ley y los profetas.
Back to English: Girl, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, this is the law and the prophets.
To Swedish: Tjejen, ja, ja, ja, ja, ja, ja, ja, detta är lagen och profeterna.
Back to English: Girl, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, this is the law and the prophets.
To Thai: ผู้หญิง,ใช่,ใช่ใช่ใช่ใช่ใช่ใช่นี่คือกฎหมายและผู้พยากรณ์
Back to English: Women,Yes,ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ this is the law and the prophets.
To Turkish: ,ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ bu yasa ve Peygamberlerin söylediği budur,Evet kadın.
Back to English: ,ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ this is the law and the prophets,Yes woman.
To Ukranian: ,ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ в цьому закон і пророки,та жінка.
Back to English: ,ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ this is the law and the prophets,and the woman.
To Vietnamese: Được ,ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ đây là luật pháp và những nhà tiên tri,và phụ nữ.
Back to English: Okay ,ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ ใช่ this is the law and the prophets,and women.

"Girl, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, this is the law and the prophets."

But it's biblical, baby!

Offline hecma925

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #94 on: March 28, 2015, 03:34:33 AM »
I can dig it.
Happy shall he be, that shall take and dash thy little ones against the rock. Alleluia.

Once Christ has filled the Cross, it can never be empty again.

"But God doesn't need your cookies!  Arrive on time!"

Offline Asteriktos

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #95 on: March 28, 2015, 02:20:15 PM »
Wis. 16:22

Original text:
But snow and ice endured the fire, and melted not, that they might know that fire burning in the hail, and sparkling in the rain, did destroy the fruits of the enemies.

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
But ice, fire, wait in the rain, the tree is the enemy you know you want to melt in the fire.

Offline hecma925

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #96 on: March 29, 2015, 03:06:02 AM »
Of course, the first mention of doughnuts in Scripture, Leviticus 7:12.

Original text:

"If he offer it for a thanksgiving, then he shall offer with the sacrifice of thanksgiving unleavened cakes mingled with oil, and unleavened wafers anointed with oil, and cakes mingled with oil, of fine flour, fried"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"If you want to thank you a victim of gratitude and cake, bread and butter, scones and fresh,intelligence, planning, cream, butter, a slice of fresh bread, fried food, soft deep powder"
Happy shall he be, that shall take and dash thy little ones against the rock. Alleluia.

Once Christ has filled the Cross, it can never be empty again.

"But God doesn't need your cookies!  Arrive on time!"

Offline hecma925

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #97 on: April 04, 2015, 06:54:59 PM »
John 6:66

Original text:

" From that time many of his disciples went back, and walked no more with him."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

" So ,in this case, as a student, but it isn't."
Happy shall he be, that shall take and dash thy little ones against the rock. Alleluia.

Once Christ has filled the Cross, it can never be empty again.

"But God doesn't need your cookies!  Arrive on time!"

Offline hecma925

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #98 on: April 18, 2015, 07:41:12 AM »
Romans 10:9-10
Original text:

"that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Mouth, God, faith, Jesus raised from the dead, because you saved it in your heart, in my heart,I am sure that it is the law, but faith in the Bible."
Happy shall he be, that shall take and dash thy little ones against the rock. Alleluia.

Once Christ has filled the Cross, it can never be empty again.

"But God doesn't need your cookies!  Arrive on time!"

Offline Asteriktos

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #99 on: February 13, 2016, 03:32:57 AM »
2 translations later, TransPerfect gives us...

Refuse your plant of the stink me, your monkey salts condamn!


Offline Asteriktos

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Re: Wonderful new Biblical translations
« Reply #100 on: December 03, 2016, 09:13:53 AM »
vis-a-vis latin via Rome vidi. cum vici America's caesar via veni infinitum unum, ergo victorium, victoreum, infinitum idem divina addendum