Author Topic: Struggling with self abuse  (Read 1890 times)

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Offline crackerjake

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Struggling with self abuse
« on: July 22, 2011, 02:18:05 AM »
     I'm not sure how to go about this, so I'll be blunt:  I've been struggling with masturbation.  I can put up a resistance to it, but I eventually give in.  I'm frustrated with myself, and I feel as if I am testing God's patience by continually asking for forgiveness over one thing.  I've been questioning my own desire to repent and cease this habit, considering that I must not feel too sorry if I can't stop.  This makes me worry that God won't forgive me since I may not truly be sincere when I ask for His forgiveness.  I fear that repenting may turn into as much a 'habit' as my sin. 
     I feel greedy asking this, but please pray for me.

Offline Gebre Menfes Kidus

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #1 on: July 22, 2011, 06:24:31 AM »
The human sex drive is the strongest human desire, perhaps even stronger than the appetite for food. This desire is given to us by God, but since the fall of man we often fail to control it. Continue to struggle, and do not despair of the mercy of God. If anyone condemns you for your failures in this area, then they reveal that they do not have the spirit of Christ. For even the Saints who have conquered the passions would point you to the grace of Our Lord, and they would tell you to trust in His unfailing love and mercy. 

The intercessions of St. Mary of Egypt have helped me greatly:



Selam
""Love is a dangerous thing. It will crush you if you trust it. But without it you can never be whole. Love crucifies, but love saves. We will either be saved together with love, or damned alone without it."    Selam, +GMK+

Offline Nero

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #2 on: July 22, 2011, 08:05:23 AM »
I agree - this drive was also the hardest thing for me to control, and it has taken many years even to make a small advancement.

Remember not to rely on your own effort alone - if you do, you may be able to resist for a little while, but not forever. The adversary is stronger than the most strong-willed human, but God is stronger than everyone and he forgives an infinite number of times. Perhaps more dangerous than the sin itself is the thought that God won't forgive, which is simply and absolutely untrue: Remember "Not seven times, but seventy times seven" and "In Him redemption is plentiful."

Lord have mercy
Lord have mercy
Lord have mercy.

Offline Tikhon.of.Colorado

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #3 on: July 22, 2011, 08:26:23 AM »
This is something I also struggle with.  It is VERY difficult for us to try and control this, even a little bit.  We must rely on God.

One thing that helps me a whole lot is more frequent confession.  I now confess every 2 weeks, instead of every 4.  You might give this a thought, as it really helps. 

Offline Shiny

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #4 on: July 22, 2011, 11:56:57 AM »
God's mercy knows no bounds! His forgiveness transcends our understanding of forgiveness. Do not despair in your sins but focus on the grace of God.

Lord, have mercy!
“There is your brother, naked, crying, and you stand there confused over the choice of an attractive floor covering.”

– St. Ambrose of Milan

Offline crackerjake

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #5 on: July 25, 2011, 01:04:56 AM »
Thankyou for the replies, they are helpful :)
« Last Edit: July 25, 2011, 01:05:13 AM by crackerjake »

Offline Robb

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #6 on: July 25, 2011, 02:30:40 AM »
Have you talked to your priest yet?  I did and it was very helpful for me.
Men may dislike truth, men may find truth offensive and inconvenient, men may persecute the truth, subvert it, try by law to suppress it. But to maintain that men have the final power over truth is blasphemy, and the last delusion. Truth lives forever, men do not.
-- Gustave Flaubert

Offline crackerjake

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #7 on: July 25, 2011, 03:12:56 PM »
I'm not a full convert yet, I'm still in the catechesis.  I find the topic to be a bit embarrassing to talk about :|

Offline zekarja

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #8 on: July 25, 2011, 05:14:07 PM »
I'm not a full convert yet, I'm still in the catechesis.  I find the topic to be a bit embarrassing to talk about :|

Most men (I can't speak for the women) struggle with this. Either the priest has already heard men confess this a lot or the men are lying. I understand the embarrassment, however, when it's all said and done your burden will be lifted. :)

Offline CBGardner

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Re: Struggling with self abuse
« Reply #9 on: July 25, 2011, 05:40:37 PM »
The human sex drive is the strongest human desire, perhaps even stronger than the appetite for food. This desire is given to us by God, but since the fall of man we often fail to control it. Continue to struggle, and do not despair of the mercy of God. If anyone condemns you for your failures in this area, then they reveal that they do not have the spirit of Christ. For even the Saints who have conquered the passions would point you to the grace of Our Lord, and they would tell you to trust in His unfailing love and mercy. 

The intercessions of St. Mary of Egypt have helped me greatly:



Selam

Since it has been posted, I've tried Gebre's suggestion and I have to say it has been such a blessing to me. I was always very drawn to Saint Mary of Egypt's story (because of my sinful background) but I got an icon of her and started asking for her intercessions and I fully believe there has been relief in my life because of her prayers. Every time I see something that makes that fire in me start to burn I say the above prayer while crossing myself a few times. Sometimes it goes right away, sometimes I have to spend more time with the prayer. But if I stay faithful to the prayer in the end I reconnect with her story and am drawn to compunction. That puts out the fire for me, until next time anyway (which is about 5 minutes later  ;) )
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