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Author Topic: Just broke up  (Read 1086 times) Average Rating: 0
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Anastasia1
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« on: May 23, 2011, 12:28:54 AM »

I'm feeling sad, and I miss him, but this is not the right relationship unless he changes something about him.

Prayers for him to take care of himself and I guess to grow in wisdom as a Godly man.
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« Reply #1 on: May 23, 2011, 12:30:53 AM »

Lord have mercy!

 Sad My prayers are with you, too.
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« Reply #2 on: May 23, 2011, 12:31:52 AM »

Lord, have mercy!

I pray for the mending of both your hearts.
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« Reply #3 on: May 23, 2011, 12:32:51 AM »

Christ is risen!
I'm feeling sad, and I miss him, but this is not the right relationship unless he changes something about him.

Prayers for him to take care of himself and I guess to grow in wisdom as a Godly man.
Lord have mercy!

NEVER go into a marriage with the idea that you will change the other person.
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                           and both come out of your mouth
Anastasia1
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« Reply #4 on: May 23, 2011, 12:56:36 AM »

Christ is risen!
I'm feeling sad, and I miss him, but this is not the right relationship unless he changes something about him.

Prayers for him to take care of himself and I guess to grow in wisdom as a Godly man.
Lord have mercy!

NEVER go into a marriage with the idea that you will change the other person.
Agreed. People should change for themselves, not for others.
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« Reply #5 on: May 23, 2011, 12:57:45 AM »

Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy.
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« Reply #6 on: May 23, 2011, 02:44:18 AM »

I'm feeling sad, and I miss him, but this is not the right relationship unless he changes something about him.

Prayers for him to take care of himself and I guess to grow in wisdom as a Godly man.
Lord have mercy.
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« Reply #7 on: May 23, 2011, 06:31:42 AM »

I'm feeling sad, and I miss him, but this is not the right relationship unless he changes something about him.

Prayers for him to take care of himself and I guess to grow in wisdom as a Godly man.

Without judgment, I encourage you to focus primarily on applying these concerns to yourself. Ask God to change you, and pray to grow in wisdom as a godly woman. Our peace does not reside in the actions and character of others, it resides only in our own spiritual growth. And please believe me when I confess that I'm still learning this lesson each and every day.

"Lord have mercy."


Selam
« Last Edit: May 23, 2011, 06:32:17 AM by Gebre Menfes Kidus » Logged

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« Reply #8 on: May 23, 2011, 08:47:52 AM »

You should move on dude...!!!
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« Reply #9 on: May 23, 2011, 09:32:27 AM »

There's plenty of advice to give, but everything I would say has been said!

Nonetheless, God be with you in these sad times.
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« Reply #10 on: May 23, 2011, 06:39:02 PM »

Sorry to hear about this.  Lord have mercy.

For what it is worth, Women enter marriage hoping to change the man.  Men enter marriage hoping the woman never changes.  Both end up disapponted.  If you can't love someone for who they are, move on - and don't be sorry about it.
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I would be happy to agree with you, but then both of us would be wrong.
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« Reply #11 on: May 23, 2011, 07:12:58 PM »

My continual prayers. Trust in the Lord, go on a retreat perhaps and then you might meet a wonderful man.

Lord have mercy.

Sorry to hear about this.  Lord have mercy.

For what it is worth, Women enter marriage hoping to change the man.  Men enter marriage hoping the woman never changes.  Both end up disapponted.  If you can't love someone for who they are, move on - and don't be sorry about it.

Wise words. Pregnancy and age certainly do change women.
« Last Edit: May 23, 2011, 07:14:05 PM by Maria » Logged

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« Reply #12 on: May 23, 2011, 08:04:37 PM »

Yep.  And boys never really grow up.

My continual prayers. Trust in the Lord, go on a retreat perhaps and then you might meet a wonderful man.

Lord have mercy.

Sorry to hear about this.  Lord have mercy.

For what it is worth, Women enter marriage hoping to change the man.  Men enter marriage hoping the woman never changes.  Both end up disapponted.  If you can't love someone for who they are, move on - and don't be sorry about it.

Wise words. Pregnancy and age certainly do change women.
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I would be happy to agree with you, but then both of us would be wrong.
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« Reply #13 on: June 03, 2011, 01:51:24 AM »

I'm feeling sad, and I miss him, but this is not the right relationship unless he changes something about him.

Prayers for him to take care of himself and I guess to grow in wisdom as a Godly man.

Without judgment, I encourage you to focus primarily on applying these concerns to yourself. Ask God to change you, and pray to grow in wisdom as a godly woman. Our peace does not reside in the actions and character of others, it resides only in our own spiritual growth. And please believe me when I confess that I'm still learning this lesson each and every day.

"Lord have mercy."


Selam
Explain how this works when someone you care about is doing something dumb/probably harmful for himself in the long run?
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Anastasia1
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« Reply #14 on: June 03, 2011, 01:54:41 AM »

My continual prayers. Trust in the Lord, go on a retreat perhaps and then you might meet a wonderful man.
I don't have a chance to go on a retreat, but I would like that, meet a wonderful man that is... And recognize him when he is there.
« Last Edit: June 03, 2011, 02:02:23 AM by Anastasia1 » Logged

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« Reply #15 on: June 03, 2011, 02:51:28 AM »

I'm feeling sad, and I miss him, but this is not the right relationship unless he changes something about him.

Prayers for him to take care of himself and I guess to grow in wisdom as a Godly man.

Without judgment, I encourage you to focus primarily on applying these concerns to yourself. Ask God to change you, and pray to grow in wisdom as a godly woman. Our peace does not reside in the actions and character of others, it resides only in our own spiritual growth. And please believe me when I confess that I'm still learning this lesson each and every day.

"Lord have mercy."


Selam
Explain how this works when someone you care about is doing something dumb/probably harmful for himself in the long run?

There is no simple formula for such a dilemma. If only love could be reduced to a mathematical equation, it would be so much easier. I don't know "how" this works, or even if it "works." But I do know that if we focus on changing ourselves and begging God to remove sin from our own lives, then we will experience more peace than if we continue to focus our efforts on trying to change others.

Speak the truth in love, offer your unconditional assistance in their efforts to repent and mend their lives, and turn your worries into prayers (as much as you can.) None of this will remove the pain you feel as you watch someone you love self-destruct. Their harmful actions towards themselves and towards you will always cause you pain. If you didn't love them, you wouldn't hurt so much. So, don't seek ways to remove the pain, but seek nearness to God so that you will find peace in them midst of the pain.

As I said, I'm trying to learn these very lessons myself, each and every day. I apologize if I sounded insensitive before.

Selam
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Anastasia1
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« Reply #16 on: June 03, 2011, 04:17:08 AM »

There is no simple formula for such a dilemma. If only love could be reduced to a mathematical equation, it would be so much easier. I don't know "how" this works, or even if it "works." But I do know that if we focus on changing ourselves and begging God to remove sin from our own lives, then we will experience more peace than if we continue to focus our efforts on trying to change others.

Speak the truth in love, offer your unconditional assistance in their efforts to repent and mend their lives, and turn your worries into prayers (as much as you can.) None of this will remove the pain you feel as you watch someone you love self-destruct. Their harmful actions towards themselves and towards you will always cause you pain. If you didn't love them, you wouldn't hurt so much. So, don't seek ways to remove the pain, but seek nearness to God so that you will find peace in them midst of the pain.

As I said, I'm trying to learn these very lessons myself, each and every day. I apologize if I sounded insensitive before.

Selam
He doesn't want to repent. I was going to let the relationship slide, not go out of me way to have a friendship with him. That is sad too.
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« Reply #17 on: June 08, 2011, 07:40:12 AM »

do not worry. have faith in God. its just life.
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« Reply #18 on: June 08, 2011, 07:40:45 AM »

just make sure you don't hurt each other but to keep the love.
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Anastasia1
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« Reply #19 on: June 12, 2011, 06:16:22 AM »

just make sure you don't hurt each other but to keep the love.
What do you mean?
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« Reply #20 on: June 27, 2011, 02:25:29 AM »

God give you both wisdom, peace and strength.
We should not try to change someone, we should respect the will of the person. However, st. John Lestvichnik writes in his book that we shall see that we have love when we suffer for the mistakes of the people destroying their souls.
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