Explain how this works when someone you care about is doing something dumb/probably harmful for himself in the long run?
I'm feeling sad, and I miss him, but this is not the right relationship unless he changes something about him.
Prayers for him to take care of himself and I guess to grow in wisdom as a Godly man.
Without judgment, I encourage you to focus primarily on applying these concerns to yourself. Ask God to change you, and pray to grow in wisdom as a godly woman. Our peace does not reside in the actions and character of others, it resides only in our own spiritual growth. And please believe me when I confess that I'm still learning this lesson each and every day.
"Lord have mercy."
There is no simple formula for such a dilemma. If only love could be reduced to a mathematical equation, it would be so much easier. I don't know "how" this works, or even if it "works." But I do know that if we focus on changing ourselves and begging God to remove sin from our own lives, then we will experience more peace than if we continue to focus our efforts on trying to change others.
Speak the truth in love, offer your unconditional assistance in their efforts to repent and mend their lives, and turn your worries into prayers (as much as you can.) None of this will remove the pain you feel as you watch someone you love self-destruct. Their harmful actions towards themselves and towards you will always cause you pain. If you didn't love them, you wouldn't hurt so much. So, don't seek ways to remove the pain, but seek nearness to God so that you will find peace in them midst of the pain.
As I said, I'm trying to learn these very lessons myself, each and every day. I apologize if I sounded insensitive before.