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Author Topic: What is your favorite "schlocky" movie?  (Read 6742 times) Average Rating: 0
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« on: May 17, 2011, 03:08:46 PM »

Inspired by orthonorm's post -- what is your favorite "schlock"y movie? Now, I'm not talking about the ones that everyone hates but you love -- but the movies that are oh so bad and yet you've burned out your VHS cassette watching it, the movie that you can quote from memory (although you wouldn't quote them to anyone outside your circle). You know it's bad, and you don't care!


Mine, hands down, is Clueless. Several years ago, I actually wrote an essay about why I was like Cher and posted it on my LiveJournal account. Before she met me, my roommate read the entry and decided that I was "AWESOME." I actually like dressing outlandishly like she did, and I have a valley girl accent (I'm from New Jersey). She did tell me that I am nothing like Cher, though. Perhaps that's a good thing. Her speeches were awful!

And yet, I love that movie to bits and pieces.


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« Reply #1 on: May 17, 2011, 03:15:35 PM »

Troll 2. If you haven't seen it, well, it is the worst movie EVER. But hilariously entertaining nonetheless.
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« Reply #2 on: May 17, 2011, 03:36:12 PM »

Inspired by orthonorm's post -- what is your favorite "schlock"y movie? Now, I'm not talking about the ones that everyone hates but you love -- but the movies that are oh so bad and yet you've burned out your VHS cassette watching it, the movie that you can quote from memory (although you wouldn't quote them to anyone outside your circle). You know it's bad, and you don't care!


Mine, hands down, is Clueless. Several years ago, I actually wrote an essay about why I was like Cher and posted it on my LiveJournal account. Before she met me, my roommate read the entry and decided that I was "AWESOME." I actually like dressing outlandishly like she did, and I have a valley girl accent (I'm from New Jersey). She did tell me that I am nothing like Cher, though. Perhaps that's a good thing. Her speeches were awful!

And yet, I love that movie to bits and pieces.




Clueless ain't schlock. It is a well written and acted film. An impeccable example of its genre. I like it a lot. I won't look at the RT aggregate score for it, but I bet it was certified fresh.
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« Reply #3 on: May 17, 2011, 03:42:11 PM »

I have a list, which I think have some redeeming characteristics, but might fit into this category.

The Last Boy Scout. If you wanted to distill the genre of Bruce Willis (who I cannot bring myself to but love) to its most basic elements, this is it. Plus before I ever heard the word bucket list, there is a scene in the movie I always wanted to happen to me. One of the few things I hoped to have happen before I die. And it did, well close enough. A heck of a story.

Point Break. Again some redeeming elements, but . . . I dunno if anyone besides one buddy of mine has watched it as much I have.

Roadhouse. No irony. And no one has watched this film more times than I. That I promise.
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« Reply #4 on: May 17, 2011, 03:48:31 PM »

Clueless ain't schlock. It is a well written and acted film. An impeccable example of its genre. I like it a lot. I won't look at the RT aggregate score for it, but I bet it was certified fresh.
Well perhaps you are looking at it from an adult lens. My 11 year old self vociferously disagrees with your statement!  Wink Cheesy
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« Reply #5 on: May 17, 2011, 03:52:33 PM »

Clueless ain't schlock. It is a well written and acted film. An impeccable example of its genre. I like it a lot. I won't look at the RT aggregate score for it, but I bet it was certified fresh.
Well perhaps you are looking at it from an adult lens. My 11 year old self vociferously disagrees with your statement!  Wink Cheesy

There's a special place in my heart for a decent high-school-underdog-ugly-duckling-come-swan-team-captain flick. Nary a dry eye at the end. I get all verklempt and whatnot.
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« Reply #6 on: May 17, 2011, 04:08:58 PM »

Red Dawn. As preposterous as the movie is, there is undeniable genius to it.
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« Reply #7 on: May 17, 2011, 04:12:39 PM »

Red Dawn. As preposterous as the movie is, there is undeniable genius to it.

Nice! Swayze was truly in some great bad movies. For all those 80's retro clowns who hold up Dirty Dancing as some icon. Nope. Red Dawn and Road House much more indicative of the era.

Brilliant use of him in Donnie Darko. Absolute unschlock.

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« Reply #8 on: May 17, 2011, 04:33:34 PM »

I actually have two : George A. Romero's Day of the Dead and of course this little "gem"...

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« Reply #9 on: May 17, 2011, 05:37:15 PM »

Redneck Zombies - They had a budget of $10,000. They made the movie on video tape. They had to beg, plead, and agree to become slave laborers to convince Troma (!) to release the film. And yet, it's one of the best horror films ever made. Naturally, a lot of people with questionable discernment can't understand the magnificence of the movie. One other thing: If you're going to buy this movie, get the older DVD version, not the newer 20th anniversary edition.
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« Reply #10 on: May 17, 2011, 05:37:21 PM »

this little "gem"...



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« Reply #11 on: May 17, 2011, 05:41:42 PM »

Troma movies in general, but Terror Firmer gets the most quotes from me and my friends.
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« Reply #12 on: May 17, 2011, 05:45:09 PM »

I have a list, which I think have some redeeming characteristics, but might fit into this category.

The Last Boy Scout. If you wanted to distill the genre of Bruce Willis (who I cannot bring myself to but love) to its most basic elements, this is it. Plus before I ever heard the word bucket list, there is a scene in the movie I always wanted to happen to me. One of the few things I hoped to have happen before I die. And it did, well close enough. A heck of a story.

Point Break. Again some redeeming elements, but . . . I dunno if anyone besides one buddy of mine has watched it as much I have.

Roadhouse. No irony. And no one has watched this film more times than I. That I promise.
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« Reply #13 on: May 17, 2011, 05:45:31 PM »


That movie is all kinds of messed up!!!  Grin
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« Reply #14 on: May 17, 2011, 05:52:47 PM »

The Last Dragon would be it for me!
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« Reply #15 on: May 17, 2011, 05:57:32 PM »

I CANNOT believe that I forgot SPICEWORLD. I can watch that movie over and over again. I think my sister and I actually ruined the VHS tape for that movie...but I am far too ashamed to buy it on DVD  Cool
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« Reply #16 on: May 17, 2011, 07:57:57 PM »

RE: Troma films.

When schlock is done for schlock sake, I don't think it counts.
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« Reply #17 on: May 17, 2011, 07:58:49 PM »

The Last Dragon would be it for me!

Nice! Complete with an El Barge track.

Good stuff coming.
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« Reply #18 on: May 17, 2011, 07:59:31 PM »

I CANNOT believe that I forgot SPICEWORLD. I can watch that movie over and over again. I think my sister and I actually ruined the VHS tape for that movie...but I am far too ashamed to buy it on DVD  Cool

Never seen it. Will put it on my to watch alone list.
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« Reply #19 on: May 17, 2011, 08:03:28 PM »

Good, just don't watch it with someone who actually liked the Spice Girls or they will be reciting the entire movie.


EDITED TO ADD: Is "Legend" with Tom Cruise considered a schlocky movie? I thought it was! I can't say I liked it but it was absolutely hilarious to watch.
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« Reply #20 on: May 17, 2011, 08:13:37 PM »

Another schlocky movie I have in my DVD collection: Howard the Duck. Though admittedly, if a young Lea Thompson wasn't in it, I would have supressed that movie along with all the other terrible movies from the 80's which have forever scarred me.
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« Reply #21 on: May 17, 2011, 08:45:34 PM »

Mothra http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0055198/

especially the creepy 1 foot tall twins http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbfMLE4De2s
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« Reply #22 on: May 17, 2011, 08:46:47 PM »

Here are some other favorites of mine: Death Wish 3
Frankenstein Must Be Destroyed
Attack of the Mushroom People
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« Reply #23 on: May 17, 2011, 09:06:07 PM »

"Schlock"... "Verklempt"...

What are we - Yiddish?

Anyway my favorite corny B-movie has always been 'Evil Dead II'...

The part where the main character's own hand becomes possessed and he has to cut it off... then the hand runs away on its fingers and turns around and flips him the bird?

Then he straps a chainsaw on the end of his arm where his hand used to be...


 
Hilarious!

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« Reply #24 on: May 17, 2011, 09:09:31 PM »

But Evil Dead 2 isn't schlock, it's a masterpiece Smiley
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« Reply #25 on: May 17, 2011, 09:26:35 PM »

But Evil Dead 2 isn't schlock, it's a masterpiece Smiley

Yes, a veritable chef-d'œuvre de fromage!

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« Reply #26 on: May 17, 2011, 09:28:17 PM »

"Schlock"... "Verklempt"...

What are we - Yiddish?
Yiddish is the best language ever!
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« Reply #27 on: May 17, 2011, 09:28:32 PM »

But Evil Dead 2 isn't schlock, it's a masterpiece Smiley

Yes, a veritable chef-d'œuvre de fromage!

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I agree with orthonorm- intentionally campy movies don't count.
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« Reply #28 on: May 17, 2011, 09:31:43 PM »

"Schlock"... "Verklempt"...

What are we - Yiddish?

Anyway my favorite corny B-movie has always been 'Evil Dead II'...

The part where the main character's own hand becomes possessed and he has to cut it off... then the hand runs away on its fingers and turns around and flips him the bird?

Then he straps a chainsaw on the end of his arm where his hand used to be...


 
Hilarious!

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עטלעכע פון אונדז          Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy

I have to agree!  this movie was my choice. I saw your pic of the poster JUST before responding with a similar post!
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« Reply #29 on: May 17, 2011, 09:33:14 PM »

Another schlocky movie I have in my DVD collection: Howard the Duck. Though admittedly, if a young Lea Thompson wasn't in it, I would have supressed that movie along with all the other terrible movies from the 80's which have forever scarred me.

Awesome! Again though, I think it might have been self-aware of its schlock. But a nice reference.
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« Reply #30 on: May 17, 2011, 09:37:15 PM »

"Schlock"... "Verklempt"...

What are we - Yiddish?

Anyway my favorite corny B-movie has always been 'Evil Dead II'...

The part where the main character's own hand becomes possessed and he has to cut it off... then the hand runs away on its fingers and turns around and flips him the bird?

Then he straps a chainsaw on the end of his arm where his hand used to be...


 
Hilarious!

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Sorry if ain't kosher, I am about as goyische kopf as you will find, but I spent too much time listening to grandparents yentering on and on. Only piece of white trash I promise who knew what the . . . . Lavern and Shirley were going about in the theme.

Again your selection too self-aware to count. And it is a good movie. Not schlock at all.
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« Reply #31 on: May 17, 2011, 09:41:13 PM »

Nice thread btw IsmiLiora!

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« Reply #32 on: May 17, 2011, 09:53:18 PM »

Anything on Mystery Science Theater 3000.
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« Reply #33 on: May 17, 2011, 09:59:33 PM »

The Last Dragon would be it for me!

Nice! Complete with an El Barge track.

Good stuff coming.

hopefully I'm not scarying anyone with this picture  Undecided
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« Reply #34 on: May 17, 2011, 10:00:04 PM »

Anything on Mystery Science Theater 3000.
+1

In my honest opinion, one of the best ("schlocky") MST3K films was Danger: Diabolik
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« Reply #35 on: May 17, 2011, 10:14:40 PM »

I enjoyed watching MST3K, but IMO even they couldn't salvage movies like Manos: The Hands of Fate.
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« Reply #36 on: May 17, 2011, 10:17:01 PM »

"Schlock"... "Verklempt"...

What are we - Yiddish?

Anyway my favorite corny B-movie has always been 'Evil Dead II'...

The part where the main character's own hand becomes possessed and he has to cut it off... then the hand runs away on its fingers and turns around and flips him the bird?

Then he straps a chainsaw on the end of his arm where his hand used to be...


 
Hilarious!

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Army of Darkness!  Evil Dead III
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« Reply #37 on: May 17, 2011, 10:23:28 PM »

My all time favorite move was Monty Python and the Holy Grail.  Favorite TV show was the Black Adder series.

Baldric, "My Lord, I have a cunning plan."

Black Adder, "Baldric, that is the worst plan since Abe Lincoln said to his wife, I'm sick of sitting around the house, let's catch a show"


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« Reply #38 on: May 17, 2011, 10:24:04 PM »

The Last Dragon would be it for me!

Nice! Complete with an El Barge track.

Good stuff coming.

hopefully I'm not scarying anyone with this picture  Undecided

lulz. You got the glow. Great stuff.
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« Reply #39 on: May 17, 2011, 10:24:19 PM »

Well certainly Army of Darkness is nowhere near as good as ED2, so I guess it might fall into schlock territory. (I feel my elistist side emerging...  angel ) Also, as much as Raimi and company complained about the studio changing the film, I actually like the shorter cut better. The only thing about the extended edition that I liked was the line "you sound like a jerk," which my teenaged friends and I took some strange pleasure in saying to each other repeatedly. I suppose the most unforgiveable thing about the extended version is that they changed the line "good. bad. I'm the guy with the gun." though it also had other changes, and was even more plodding than the shorter version was. [/elitist]  Nonetheless, I shant speak ill of anything Bruce Campbell does, so... I still give it two thumbs up.
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« Reply #40 on: May 17, 2011, 10:26:57 PM »

Way back as a kid, some of the best copy on a movie poster ever:

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« Reply #41 on: May 17, 2011, 10:39:24 PM »

Another classic movie.

The Toxic Avenger.

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« Reply #42 on: May 17, 2011, 11:16:57 PM »

Another classic movie.

The Toxic Avenger.



You all are really losing the point of this thread . . .
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« Reply #43 on: May 17, 2011, 11:34:57 PM »

Another classic movie.

The Toxic Avenger.

Another movie that I own mostly because of one actress in it (Jennifer Babtist). I really am a pig.  Cool
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« Reply #44 on: May 17, 2011, 11:47:38 PM »

"Schlock"... "Verklempt"...

What are we - Yiddish?
Yiddish is the best language ever!

Well, to each their own I guess.

It always sounds gutteral and whiny to me.

Favorite use of a Yiddish word on TV?

George calls Elaine a 'shiksa' on Seinfeld.

Quote
Elaine: So now the *other* Lippman kissed me.

George: Well, sure. They're Jewish, and you're a shiksa.

Elaine: What?

George: It means a non-Jewish woman.

Elaine: I know what it means, but what does being a shiksa have to

do with it?

George: You've got 'shiksappeal'. Jewish men love the idea of

meeting a woman that's not like their mother.

"Shiksa is a loaded term, and usually offensive. It does not merely describe a certain kind of non-Jewish woman, but rather refers to the certain kind of woman no self-respecting Jew would want to be."



But Evil Dead 2 isn't schlock, it's a masterpiece Smiley

Yes, a veritable chef-d'œuvre de fromage!

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†NI KA†


I agree with orthonorm- intentionally campy movies don't count.

OK... Fine.

But how can you be sure that it was intentional?

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« Reply #45 on: May 18, 2011, 12:21:10 AM »

You all are really losing the point of this thread . . .

Your rules are really raining on my parade.  Half the movies I like (Three Amigos, Spaceballs, etc.) were intended to be campy.  Cool

What about Bloodsport? I would think that Van Damme was too full of himself to be in a movie that he knew was intended to be schlocky or campy or corny.

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« Reply #46 on: May 18, 2011, 12:26:51 AM »

LOL ALL of Van Damme's movies are super schlocky. My sister loves him without any irony whatsoever. I think he's hilarious.
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« Reply #47 on: May 18, 2011, 12:33:38 AM »

It's tough to pick, but I'd have to go with "Hangar 18." Now I think I could shoot a better film with the 'budget' I have in my wallet, but back when I saw it, it freaked the daylights out of me.  Cheesy
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« Reply #48 on: May 18, 2011, 01:20:55 AM »

End of Days.
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« Reply #49 on: May 18, 2011, 02:12:47 AM »

RE: Troma films.

When schlock is done for schlock sake, I don't think it counts.
Agreed.
Plus, I used to know a lot of the folks at Troma, and even during my darker years, I didn't enjoy them much at all.
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« Reply #50 on: May 18, 2011, 02:14:40 AM »

I would have gone with Point Break and Roadhouse, but as they've been mentioned, I'll go ahead and mention Iron Eagle.
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« Reply #51 on: May 18, 2011, 02:28:10 AM »

I went to the Troma website and it looked pretty raunchy to me so I left. However, after going there it did bring back memories of a movie that I liked when I was in middle school called "Serial Mom". I wouldn't recommend that movie because it's pretty bad but I had memorized just about the whole movie. Very Schlocky at the time and not too many people have heard of it now. I guess that is because it was directed by John Waters. Anyways..
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« Reply #52 on: May 18, 2011, 08:42:25 PM »

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« Reply #53 on: May 18, 2011, 09:07:48 PM »

How about Dune, (1984), does it qualify?   I love the move, but everyone else seems to hate it.
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« Reply #54 on: May 18, 2011, 09:51:51 PM »

Does Sean Connery's awful movie Zardoz deserve a spot?  It's got a giant flying skull, and 1970's sci-fi pantsuits, and did I mention.....A FLYING SKULL?
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« Reply #55 on: May 18, 2011, 10:04:01 PM »

How about Dune, (1984), does it qualify?   I love the move, but everyone else seems to hate it.

The one directed David Lynch?

Nope. Pretty good in my opinion. Especially, within the light of the entirety of his work. He can tell a decent story when reigned in (The Elephant Man). And can tackle a variety of subject matter.

But I can see how others would disagree.
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« Reply #56 on: May 18, 2011, 10:30:58 PM »



Hey, that's a good movie.
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« Reply #57 on: May 18, 2011, 10:59:05 PM »

Does Sean Connery's awful movie Zardoz deserve a spot?  It's got a giant flying skull, and 1970's sci-fi pantsuits, and did I mention.....A FLYING SKULL?

Strange, I found this a rather deep, thought provoking, sci-fi movie along with "Dark Star" that also came out in 1974. Then again, I really like Jim Henson's "The Christmas Toy" and perhaps it is just me.
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« Reply #58 on: May 18, 2011, 11:42:43 PM »

Eraser Head
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qrl3n2ZtK2E
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« Reply #59 on: May 18, 2011, 11:46:36 PM »

Does Sean Connery's awful movie Zardoz deserve a spot?  It's got a giant flying skull, and 1970's sci-fi pantsuits, and did I mention.....A FLYING SKULL?
How about Phantasm? flying spheres with razors sticking out
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJojkFFUsdo
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« Reply #60 on: May 19, 2011, 12:12:32 AM »

Battlefield Earth is another "masterpiece". Horrible acting and a ridiculous plot, yet thoroughly entertaining to watch. This is easily the worst performance Travolta has ever given. What was he going for? Thespian extraordinaire? Sounds like he rehearsed for a Shakespeare parody, not a Sci-Fi flick.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqWK85gJaxc&feature=related
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« Reply #61 on: May 19, 2011, 01:42:36 AM »

LOL ALL of Van Damme's movies are super schlocky. My sister loves him without any irony whatsoever. I think he's hilarious.
there's only reason to watch Van Damme and it ain't his acting Wink
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« Reply #62 on: May 19, 2011, 07:04:37 AM »

How about Dune, (1984), does it qualify?   I love the move, but everyone else seems to hate it.

The one directed David Lynch?

Nope. Pretty good in my opinion. Especially, within the light of the entirety of his work. He can tell a decent story when reigned in (The Elephant Man). And can tackle a variety of subject matter.

But I can see how others would disagree.


I love Lynch's Dune. People tend to criticize it for its lack of faithfulness to the novel (apparently Lynch himself is rather embarrassed by it) but I simply appreciate it on its own merits. Its surreal imagery and soundtrack have haunted me since I was little. I also thoroughly enjoy watching Sting jump up and down, yelling "I will kill him!!!"
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« Reply #63 on: May 19, 2011, 07:08:22 AM »

Does Sean Connery's awful movie Zardoz deserve a spot?  It's got a giant flying skull, and 1970's sci-fi pantsuits, and did I mention.....A FLYING SKULL?

More like a flying tiki head. I don't know if Zardoz is "awful", but it's perhaps weighed down with ideas and has some very silly moments. It's a very interesting failure. I remember listening to the director's commentary (don't laugh at me) and the director (Jon Boorman) said something like, "I cannot believe my hubris when I was making this film." But the opening scene with the flying stone head is, in my opinion, genius.

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« Reply #64 on: May 19, 2011, 08:23:35 AM »

PEOPLE. Dune IS schlock. That is all.  Cool
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« Reply #65 on: May 19, 2011, 09:26:33 AM »

Does Sean Connery's awful movie Zardoz deserve a spot?  It's got a giant flying skull, and 1970's sci-fi pantsuits, and did I mention.....A FLYING SKULL?

More like a flying tiki head.

You're right.  A bearded tiki head is a much better description.  Now if you want a really excellent Sean Connery sci-fi/fantasy movies, my absolute favorite is the original Highlander;  the sequels could be voted best schlocky movies, but the first is really well done.  I've probably seen it 2 dozen times and never grow tired of it.
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« Reply #66 on: May 19, 2011, 09:31:27 AM »

Apparently Zardoz was originally supposed to be an adaptation of the Lord of the Rings, then the licensing fell through....
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« Reply #67 on: May 19, 2011, 02:17:24 PM »

Does Sean Connery's awful movie Zardoz deserve a spot?  It's got a giant flying skull, and 1970's sci-fi pantsuits, and did I mention.....A FLYING SKULL?
How about Phantasm? flying spheres with razors sticking out
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJojkFFUsdo

No doubt. Actually scared my brother.

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« Reply #68 on: May 19, 2011, 02:19:44 PM »

This thread like most is coming off the rails.

What is your favorite schlocky movie?

That is a movie you have watched more than a few times and thoroughly enjoy and ain't some self-referential, low post-modern, low ironic film. IOW a film that was that ostensibly was made for straightforward mass entertainment.

Toss another of mine into the mix Bring it on!

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« Reply #69 on: May 19, 2011, 02:22:11 PM »


Toss another of mine into the mix Bring it on!


I was WAITING for someone to mention Bring it On!! I am surprised it was you!  Cheesy (Or should I not be, given your apparent love for teenage-girl films?)

I don't know if "Blades of Glory" is schlock. I guess they're kind of self aware, but I have not really liked any Will Ferrell movies....However, I watched "Blades of Glory" in an airplane and was publicly hushed all around for screaming with laughter during naptime hours....it's the one movie in my collection that I have to explain to all guests. (95% of the other films are foreign films.)
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« Reply #70 on: May 19, 2011, 02:26:17 PM »

Oh yeah, one that might qualify for many of you:

That piece of tripe about the Orthodox monk called The Island in English.

Pure schlock.

And pretty much any film about Jesus except for maybe Mel Gibson's film, which actually has many redeemable qualities.

OK, now I have another I just thought of while writing the above Cecil B. Demille's The Ten Commandments, the 1956 version. Can't think of an Easter (oops, Pascha) without it.

If you ain't seen his version from 1923, I strongly advise you do. Rather interesting.
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« Reply #71 on: May 19, 2011, 02:29:48 PM »


Toss another of mine into the mix Bring it on!


I was WAITING for someone to mention Bring it On!! I am surprised it was you!  Cheesy (Or should I not be, given your apparent love for teenage-girl films?)

I don't know if "Blades of Glory" is schlock. I guess they're kind of self aware, but I have not really liked any Will Ferrell movies....However, I watched "Blades of Glory" in an airplane and was publicly hushed all around for screaming with laughter during naptime hours....it's the one movie in my collection that I have to explain to all guests. (95% of the other films are foreign films.)

Told you I love those silly high school underdog movies.

Blades of Glory ain't schlock. It is ****ing brilliant. Arguably one of the best pure comedies of the last eight years. I saw it the first time with a gaggle of 14 year old boys, it was a blast. Probably watch it every six months. I have to say I laugh as hard every time.

Mean Girls is the only other contender to the crown. Again my penchant for the whole high school ugly duckling thing. Great movie.

Highly recommenced.
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« Reply #72 on: May 19, 2011, 02:34:57 PM »


Toss another of mine into the mix Bring it on!


I was WAITING for someone to mention Bring it On!! I am surprised it was you!  Cheesy (Or should I not be, given your apparent love for teenage-girl films?)

My stupid and embarrassingly love for good romcoms and such nonsense like Bring it on! (don't even bring up the TV I am watch) plus a willingness to dance without a drink in my hand with just about any woman at a wedding reception or elsewhere has allowed me to overcome my physical and personality defects when it comes to attracting the opposite sex.
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« Reply #73 on: May 19, 2011, 02:55:08 PM »


My stupid and embarrassingly love for good romcoms and such nonsense like Bring it on! (don't even bring up the TV I am watch) plus a willingness to dance without a drink in my hand with just about any woman at a wedding reception or elsewhere has allowed me to overcome my physical and personality defects when it comes to attracting the opposite sex.
If you didn't post your picture here, I would think that you are one of my best friends from college, who would watch romcoms with me and cry (he also begged me to watch the SATC movie with him!). You don't knit, do you?  Wink

By the way, dancing with a lot of women anywhere gets you a million points. I am sure you know that first-hand, it sounds like.


ETA: Someone should totally start a guilty pleasure TV shows thread....that would be a LOT of tun!
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« Reply #74 on: May 19, 2011, 02:56:23 PM »

Pumping Iron

I'm not sure how much they sensed that it was going to be schlocky. The way they talk about trying to get the film financed and made makes me think that they took it quite seriously, even if they admitted that it was also a somewhat crazy subculture. But either way, I love the film, and there are some great lines in there. I do find the delusions that George Butler and others have about the film to be comical, but having said that, at least they're honest enough to admit that some of it was fiction and set up to create a better story (though Butler is still willing to fib about things in interviews to make the story sound better).
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« Reply #75 on: May 19, 2011, 03:37:24 PM »

Starship Trooper FTW! Never has such cheez been so much fun.
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« Reply #76 on: May 19, 2011, 04:05:50 PM »

Starship Trooper FTW! Never has such cheez been so much fun.

Starship Trooper is disqualified on account of being pure irony. The odd thing is, a lot of people took it seriously. My friend and I were the only people in the theater laughing.

For my part, I'll throw in Sergio Corbucci's Django. Outside of the Leone films, spaghetti westerns tend to be on the schlocky side.
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« Reply #77 on: May 19, 2011, 04:17:47 PM »

Oh yeah, one that might qualify for many of you:

That piece of tripe about the Orthodox monk called The Island in English.

Pure schlock.

You are making a pretty big throwdown Orthonorm by describing Ostrov Island as a schlock movie!  Pray tell what makes this a schlock movie by any standard?  A little fantastical but not any more so than reading the lives of the saints.
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« Reply #78 on: May 19, 2011, 04:26:43 PM »

Starship Trooper FTW! Never has such cheez been so much fun.

Starship Trooper is disqualified on account of being pure irony. The odd thing is, a lot of people took it seriously. My friend and I were the only people in the theater laughing.

For my part, I'll throw in Sergio Corbucci's Django. Outside of the Leone films, spaghetti westerns tend to be on the schlocky side.

Thank you for getting the point. Heinlein though as an author basically killed the whole time travel genre brilliantly in a single short story. A wonderful story and a quick read: All You Zombies.
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« Reply #79 on: May 19, 2011, 04:37:54 PM »

Oh yeah, one that might qualify for many of you:

That piece of tripe about the Orthodox monk called The Island in English.

Pure schlock.

You are making a pretty big throwdown Orthonorm by describing Ostrov Island as a schlock movie!  Pray tell what makes this a schlock movie by any standard?  A little fantastical but not any more so than reading the lives of the saints.

You're right, some of the accounts of the lives of the Saints are almost pure lulz. You really have to aware of the genre of the various times they were written in to bracket out a lot of baggage the stories carry that smack trite to the (post/hyper)-modern reader, especially those written in the wake of mediaval legendary genre.

Sorry, but if you ain't at least chuckling at some of those stories or rolling your eyes, you might want to check for the sin of piety.

Sorry, but unfortunately for most Saints, they did not have an author the caliber of Shakespeare or even a Dostoyevsky telling their stories.

The Island is utterly predictable, sentimental, pedantic, hackneyed, stilted (continue every cliched flaw in story telling).

It's only redeeming characteristic is that the director had the restraint and creativity of an art school student to pick up some nice environmentals.

Outside the story, the other lulz is that the actor playing the lead caricature (not sure if a real human shows up in the entire film), said he basically played himself in the role.

It is a bad Orthodox superhero film.

But if you like it, that's great. That is the point of this thread.


 

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« Reply #80 on: May 19, 2011, 04:41:25 PM »

My wifes fav. is : "The Dairy" total girls movie.. If I am forced to see it one more time...........

Mine is "Horse Soldiers" ..total boys Movie and real schlocky... John Wayne. Here is my favorite part:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RW7PPpyo6yw

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« Reply #81 on: May 19, 2011, 04:43:20 PM »

My wifes fav. is : "The Dairy" total girls movie.. If I am forced to see it one more time...........

Mine is "Horse Soldiers" ..total boys Movie and real schlocky... John Wayne. Here is my favorite part:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RW7PPpyo6yw



Pretty much anything with John Wayne qualifies. Please let me know if there is anything redeemable in his career. Lulz, at his role as the Centurion. One of the funniest moments in Hollywood ever.
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« Reply #82 on: May 19, 2011, 04:53:07 PM »

Bubba Hotep, best bad movie ever.

They Call Me Trinity is on my permanent list of favorite movies.
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« Reply #83 on: May 19, 2011, 05:04:23 PM »

Re: lives of the saints, I find the "legendary" parts some of the most moving and worthwhile. If they are not literally "true", then think of them like flowers around someone's grave. I have no interest in modern scholarship's attempt to construct the "historic" St. Patrick or whoever. The growth of "legendary" matter around a saint is a testament to the vitality of the cult. Modern "objective" historicism is no more truthful than the medieval folklore, but it's a hell of a lot more boring.

In terms of writing, some lives of saints are better than others. A lot of Metaphrastes' lives are beautifully written, in my opinion.
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« Reply #84 on: May 19, 2011, 05:05:22 PM »

Oh yeah, one that might qualify for many of you:

That piece of tripe about the Orthodox monk called The Island in English.

Pure schlock.

You are making a pretty big throwdown Orthonorm by describing Ostrov Island as a schlock movie!  Pray tell what makes this a schlock movie by any standard?  A little fantastical but not any more so than reading the lives of the saints.

You're right, some of the accounts of the lives of the Saints are almost pure lulz. You really have to aware of the genre of the various times they were written in to bracket out a lot of baggage the stories carry that smack trite to the (post/hyper)-modern reader, especially those written in the wake of mediaval legendary genre.

Sorry, but if you ain't at least chuckling at some of those stories or rolling your eyes, you might want to check for the sin of piety.

Sorry, but unfortunately for most Saints, they did not have an author the caliber of Shakespeare or even a Dostoyevsky telling their stories.

The Island is utterly predictable, sentimental, pedantic, hackneyed, stilted (continue every cliched flaw in story telling).

It's only redeeming characteristic is that the director had the restraint and creativity of an art school student to pick up some nice environmentals.

Outside the story, the other lulz is that the actor playing the lead caricature (not sure if a real human shows up in the entire film), said he basically played himself in the role.

It is a bad Orthodox superhero film.

But if you like it, that's great. That is the point of this thread.


 



Wow, for the use of the above bolded words I think I have just lost all respect for you.   Cry
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« Reply #85 on: May 19, 2011, 05:11:27 PM »


Sorry, but if you ain't at least chuckling at some of those stories or rolling your eyes, you might want to check for the sin of piety.


Since when has piety been a sin?  False piety, pomposity, pride, perjury, perhaps, but piety?  Preposterous.
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« Reply #86 on: May 19, 2011, 05:12:56 PM »

Oh yeah, one that might qualify for many of you:

That piece of tripe about the Orthodox monk called The Island in English.

Pure schlock.

You are making a pretty big throwdown Orthonorm by describing Ostrov Island as a schlock movie!  Pray tell what makes this a schlock movie by any standard?  A little fantastical but not any more so than reading the lives of the saints.

You're right, some of the accounts of the lives of the Saints are almost pure lulz. You really have to aware of the genre of the various times they were written in to bracket out a lot of baggage the stories carry that smack trite to the (post/hyper)-modern reader, especially those written in the wake of mediaval legendary genre.

Sorry, but if you ain't at least chuckling at some of those stories or rolling your eyes, you might want to check for the sin of piety.

Sorry, but unfortunately for most Saints, they did not have an author the caliber of Shakespeare or even a Dostoyevsky telling their stories.

The Island is utterly predictable, sentimental, pedantic, hackneyed, stilted (continue every cliched flaw in story telling).

It's only redeeming characteristic is that the director had the restraint and creativity of an art school student to pick up some nice environmentals.

Outside the story, the other lulz is that the actor playing the lead caricature (not sure if a real human shows up in the entire film), said he basically played himself in the role.

It is a bad Orthodox superhero film.

But if you like it, that's great. That is the point of this thread.


 



Wow, for the use of the above bolded words I think I have just lost all respect for you.   Cry

I've lost the respect of others for fewer words. Like it or not, this thread doesn't exist outside that nebulous description of our time.
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« Reply #87 on: May 19, 2011, 05:17:16 PM »


Sorry, but if you ain't at least chuckling at some of those stories or rolling your eyes, you might want to check for the sin of piety.


Since when has piety been a sin?  False piety, pomposity, pride, perjury, perhaps, but piety?  Preposterous.

Then you are not familiar with its full usage in the English language. It can mean engaging the trappings of "religious" or "spiritual" life without much else going on.

"False piety" can be conveyed in English by simply using the word "piety". If you want to know how it is being used look at the context. In what I wrote, it is pretty clear which.

It is a case of an ironic use of a word becoming part of the standard usage.
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« Reply #88 on: May 19, 2011, 05:23:42 PM »

Re: lives of the saints, I find the "legendary" parts some of the most moving and worthwhile. If they are not literally "true", then think of them like flowers around someone's grave. I have no interest in modern scholarship's attempt to construct the "historic" St. Patrick or whoever. The growth of "legendary" matter around a saint is a testament to the vitality of the cult. Modern "objective" historicism is no more truthful than the medieval folklore, but it's a hell of a lot more boring.

In terms of writing, some lives of saints are better than others. A lot of Metaphrastes' lives are beautifully written, in my opinion.

Some folks do like the legendary embellishments. Some people like to go to Ren-Fest. To each their own. I would not be able give you some examples off the top of my head. I'll have to ask my friend who is really into this sorta stuff. He is a rather close lay student of legends. And he occasionally will pull out an example of a life of a Saint that is just hilarious.

And my post did not suggest anything about "objectivity" or even "historicism". I mentioned genre criticism. Which everyone with a modicum of education engages in. It is just a matter to what degree and how explicitly.

After all, we do talk about parables, psalms, wisdom literature, etc. all the time here. And I think most would say they are not to be read the same way.

Anyway we are getting off track.



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« Reply #89 on: May 19, 2011, 07:54:24 PM »

Re: lives of the saints, I find the "legendary" parts some of the most moving and worthwhile. If they are not literally "true", then think of them like flowers around someone's grave. I have no interest in modern scholarship's attempt to construct the "historic" St. Patrick or whoever. The growth of "legendary" matter around a saint is a testament to the vitality of the cult. Modern "objective" historicism is no more truthful than the medieval folklore, but it's a hell of a lot more boring.

In terms of writing, some lives of saints are better than others. A lot of Metaphrastes' lives are beautifully written, in my opinion.

Some folks do like the legendary embellishments. Some people like to go to Ren-Fest.

I've never been to Ren-Fest but I do love poetry and see truth in poetry, and try to see poetry in the world. And, like Elder Porphyrios says, that's an important part of being Christian. Yes, I am writing this message to you on the internet in the year 2011 where I can download ancient chants onto an iPod while watching Conan the Destroyer. Yes, we are all influenced and colored by modernity. I don't understand why such an aura of profundity is attached to such obvious and banal observations. It doesn't change what Truth is- Christ, the same, yesterday, today, tomorrow.

Quote
And my post did not suggest anything about "objectivity" or even "historicism". I mentioned genre criticism. Which everyone with a modicum of education engages in. It is just a matter to what degree and how explicitly.

You mentioned "bracketing out" the "baggage" that doesn't fit our modern sensibilities, which seems to me to go far beyond any genre criticism. Why would you want to do such a thing?

Quote
After all, we do talk about parables, psalms, wisdom literature, etc. all the time here. And I think most would say they are not to be read the same way.

And we don't dismiss the Psalms or ridicule them because David occasionally mentions mountains leaping with joy.

Quote
Anyway we are getting off track.


Yes, back to schlock. Conan the Destroyer (though I think ...the Barbarian is actually a fine film).
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« Reply #90 on: May 19, 2011, 07:58:24 PM »

Yes, back to schlock. Conan the Destroyer (though I think ...the Barbarian is actually a fine film).

Destroyer I liked (and own), though I'd agree that it's schlock. Barbarian I thought was rather boring (with the exception of the "hear the lamentation of the women" part), but everyone seems to think it the better of the two...  police
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« Reply #91 on: May 19, 2011, 08:03:46 PM »

Yes, back to schlock. Conan the Destroyer (though I think ...the Barbarian is actually a fine film).

Destroyer I liked (and own), though I'd agree that it's schlock. Barbarian I thought was rather boring (with the exception of the "hear the lamentation of the women" part), but everyone seems to think it the better of the two...  police

The lamentation of the women... the theological debate between Conan and Subotai ("Crom laughs at your four winds")... Conan's brilliant prayer to Crom... the cult of Thulsa Doom ("they told me lord to thrown down his sword and return to the earth... ha! Time enough for earth in the grave)... the riddle of steel... Conan being seduced by the sorceress than throwing her into the fire... this movie is endless genius. As you can tell I like Conan the Barbarian .
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« Reply #92 on: May 19, 2011, 10:09:16 PM »

Yes, back to schlock. Conan the Destroyer (though I think ...the Barbarian is actually a fine film).

Destroyer I liked (and own), though I'd agree that it's schlock. Barbarian I thought was rather boring (with the exception of the "hear the lamentation of the women" part), but everyone seems to think it the better of the two...  police

The lamentation of the women... the theological debate between Conan and Subotai ("Crom laughs at your four winds")... Conan's brilliant prayer to Crom... the cult of Thulsa Doom ("they told me lord to thrown down his sword and return to the earth... ha! Time enough for earth in the grave)... the riddle of steel... Conan being seduced by the sorceress than throwing her into the fire... this movie is endless genius. As you can tell I like Conan the Barbarian .

Wasn't that an Arnold Movie ?  {{{snikering}}
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« Reply #93 on: May 20, 2011, 01:04:07 AM »

When I was young, I liked Toy Soldiers (1991) and my dad and I enjoyed Flash Gordon (1980).

I don't know if it's schlock but I love Big Trouble in Little China.
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« Reply #94 on: May 20, 2011, 01:12:24 AM »

Yes, back to schlock. Conan the Destroyer (though I think ...the Barbarian is actually a fine film).

Agreed.
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« Reply #95 on: May 20, 2011, 02:55:04 AM »

Whoever said Pumping Iron was schlock, nah. It's a well-made, very self-aware look at a strange subculture. And it rules, though I think 70's bodybuilding ruined how people lifted weights for about 30 years.
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« Reply #96 on: May 20, 2011, 03:06:38 AM »

Whoever said Pumping Iron was schlock, nah. It's a well-made, very self-aware look at a strange subculture. And it rules, though I think 70's bodybuilding ruined how people lifted weights for about 30 years.

If more people did BBing than the fads of today, they would have better results.

Gotta go way back in the iron game to find the gems for the common guy, thankfully those ideas which are simple have been around forever and will remain while all the nonsense that comes and goes, well comes and goes.

Never seen the film. No idea about it. But if you want to get your DL up, I have ideas on that.

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« Reply #97 on: May 20, 2011, 03:31:03 AM »

Whoever said Pumping Iron was schlock, nah. It's a well-made, very self-aware look at a strange subculture. And it rules, though I think 70's bodybuilding ruined how people lifted weights for about 30 years.

If more people did BBing than the fads of today, they would have better results.

Gotta go way back in the iron game to find the gems for the common guy, thankfully those ideas which are simple have been around forever and will remain while all the nonsense that comes and goes, well comes and goes.

Never seen the film. No idea about it. But if you want to get your DL up, I have ideas on that.


It's going up, 30lbs since our last discussion on it, successfully pulled 275.  Smiley

I can't imagine you'd be opposed to the kind of work I'm advocating: power lifts, oly lifts, over isolated bicep work, college kids drinking sugar/caffeine/chemical supplements and going in for "chest and back" day etc.... Can hardly call power/oly lifting "some fad", but then we'll end up hijacking this thread...

And you should see it. It's really very entertaining.
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« Reply #98 on: May 20, 2011, 03:48:19 AM »

Grease 2.

Absolutely no redeeming qualities whatsoever and I love every single schlocky moment of it.
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« Reply #99 on: May 20, 2011, 05:23:20 AM »

Whoever said Pumping Iron was schlock, nah. It's a well-made, very self-aware look at a strange subculture.

You would make a good comedian Smiley
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« Reply #100 on: May 20, 2011, 05:28:54 AM »

"The Exorcist"
Some people wouldn't agree that movie is schlock, after all it won several Academy Awards and other regonitions, but watching it now, it's so schlocky! Ellen Burstyn standing around emoting, Jason Miller's unfocused "detachment", lee J Cobb's bizarre portrayl of the detective. The wierd german domestics. And all wrapped around special effects that were second rate even by 70's standards. When it came out in '73 or '74 I was under 17 and had to slip the ticket guy an extra dollar to let me into a "R" movie.

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« Reply #101 on: May 20, 2011, 06:29:24 AM »

That is true. "The Omen," "Carrie," "Rosemary's Baby"- a lot of horror movies of that era have their tacky elements even though they are quite scary in sum.  Smiley
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« Reply #102 on: May 20, 2011, 06:40:13 AM »

That is true. "The Omen," "Carrie," "Rosemary's Baby"- a lot of horror movies of that era have their tacky elements even though they are quite scary in sum.  Smiley
I didn't find Rosemary's Baby to schlocky, I thought it was well done.
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« Reply #103 on: May 20, 2011, 06:46:19 AM »

Rosemary's Baby is fine. Italian horror movies tend on the schlocky side. They usually have that unique combination of bad acting/ dialogue with some very surreal visuals and plots. Lucio Fulci's The Beyond for example.
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« Reply #104 on: May 20, 2011, 07:56:14 AM »

Whoever said Pumping Iron was schlock, nah. It's a well-made, very self-aware look at a strange subculture. And it rules, though I think 70's bodybuilding ruined how people lifted weights for about 30 years.

If more people did BBing than the fads of today, they would have better results.

Gotta go way back in the iron game to find the gems for the common guy, thankfully those ideas which are simple have been around forever and will remain while all the nonsense that comes and goes, well comes and goes.

Never seen the film. No idea about it. But if you want to get your DL up, I have ideas on that.


It's going up, 30lbs since our last discussion on it, successfully pulled 275.  Smiley

I can't imagine you'd be opposed to the kind of work I'm advocating: power lifts, oly lifts, over isolated bicep work, college kids drinking sugar/caffeine/chemical supplements and going in for "chest and back" day etc.... Can hardly call power/oly lifting "some fad", but then we'll end up hijacking this thread...

And you should see it. It's really very entertaining.

I do Fork Lifts
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« Reply #105 on: May 20, 2011, 01:40:28 PM »

Yes, back to schlock. Conan the Destroyer (though I think ...the Barbarian is actually a fine film).

Destroyer I liked (and own), though I'd agree that it's schlock. Barbarian I thought was rather boring (with the exception of the "hear the lamentation of the women" part), but everyone seems to think it the better of the two...  police

The lamentation of the women... the theological debate between Conan and Subotai ("Crom laughs at your four winds")... Conan's brilliant prayer to Crom... the cult of Thulsa Doom ("they told me lord to thrown down his sword and return to the earth... ha! Time enough for earth in the grave)... the riddle of steel... Conan being seduced by the sorceress than throwing her into the fire... this movie is endless genius. As you can tell I like Conan the Barbarian .

That was one of the best movies ever made, In my not so humble opinion.  The pure awesomeness of the film is at times staggering.  I loved his father's speech at the beginning (this you can trust!).  The Tree of Woe is the most awesome name of anything ever uttered in film history.  And then there's "You killed my mother!  You killed my people!  You stole my Father's sword!" pronouncing the 'w' in sword!
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« Reply #106 on: May 21, 2011, 02:35:37 AM »

Conan: The Barbarian is simply good. Consensus has been taken.

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« Reply #107 on: May 22, 2011, 08:18:44 PM »

Haven't seen it since high school, but after seeing Win-Win, how could I forget wearing out a VHS copy of Vision Quest.


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« Reply #108 on: June 15, 2011, 01:22:00 AM »

Valley of the Dolls.
Sparkle Neely!
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« Reply #109 on: January 31, 2012, 11:09:40 PM »

I'm going to watch Bloodsport tonight in honor of this thread.  Smiley
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« Reply #110 on: January 31, 2012, 11:33:52 PM »

Tron. Loved it as a kid, and I love it today, but with slightly more critical eyes.
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« Reply #111 on: January 31, 2012, 11:36:30 PM »

Tron. Loved it as a kid, and I love it today, but with slightly more critical eyes.
Just watched that last night. Great movie.
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« Reply #112 on: February 20, 2012, 10:07:47 PM »



[/quote]
Pretty much anything with John Wayne qualifies. Please let me know if there is anything redeemable in his career. Lulz, at his role as the Centurion. One of the funniest moments in Hollywood ever.
[/quote]

There are plenty of John Wayne movies that I love to watch:  They Were Expendable, The Three Godfathers, Sands of Iwo Jima, The Quiet Man, and The Searchers, to name a few.

John Wayne is the type of iconic actor that the self-proclaimed "smart people" love to hate.  You know, the people who sneer at good triumphing over evil, who laugh at patriotism, and who dismiss chivalry as thinly veiled misogyny. Please note, I am not leveling this criticism at anyone on this board.

In addition, John Wayne made over 150 movies in his career, yet his detractors usually concentrate on a handful of stinkers.  By and large, I think his movies are entertaining and I like the fact that he usually portrayed honorable characters that one could look up to.

Per the OP, I agree that Clueless and Red Dawn, while "universally" criticized, are films that are nonetheless good to watch.  
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« Reply #113 on: June 25, 2013, 10:28:21 PM »

Dodgeball

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« Reply #114 on: June 25, 2013, 10:35:04 PM »

I've definitely a few (in no particular order):
1) Young Sherlock Holmes
2)  The Final Countdown
3)  Flash Gordon
4)  Magnum Force
5)  Clue
6)  Big Trouble in Little China
7)  They Live
Cool  The Replacements
9)  Top Gun
10)  Hamlet 2
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« Reply #115 on: February 27, 2014, 10:40:16 PM »

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« Reply #116 on: February 27, 2014, 10:49:58 PM »



I had to look this up, but I have argued in this thread that Zardoz is not a Schlocky movie and that I really like Dark Star (think Marc1152) and my many attempts to attract people to the Christmas Toy by Jim Henson.
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