Author Topic: Well..........I told my wife that I am inquirying about converting to Orthodox..  (Read 1160 times)

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Offline NMHS

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and.................it didn't go over so well.  But I'm sure that I'm not the only one that has gone through this type of thing.  Rather than trying to understand what I have come to believe and that my relationship with God has only been strengthened, she can only think of the break in unity of our family by doing this.  She thinks I am being selfish and that I need to remain committed to the RCC.  She is very, very, grudgling supportive................time will tell.

Lord have mercy.


Offline mabsoota

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may God give you wisdom, patience, and above all, love.
the time i waited to join the orthodox church was truly very difficult, even though it was not very long!
but i think i learnt a lot about God's love and mercy in that time. i still have a lot to learn.
getting closer to God means leaving behind old habits like always being right, not listening well etc etc. and this kind of spiritual growth comes through struggle and self-control.  ;)

Offline NMHS

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Thank you, I also wanted to mention that though I have this desire and I am inquiring with my local priest about this I am also prepared to take as long as it may to get there.

Offline tuesdayschild

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I have heard that some Roman Catholic priests are supportive when one of their parishioners feels drawn to the Orthodox Church. If your priest is, maybe he can relieve your wife of some of her concerns.

Offline NMHS

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I have heard that some Roman Catholic priests are supportive when one of their parishioners feels drawn to the Orthodox Church. If your priest is, maybe he can relieve your wife of some of her concerns.

Interesting,  Thanks!

Offline Veronika

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It can feel like a breech of trust when a spouse receives a "surprise" regarding the other's deeply held belief. If you really just "told" her I am not at all surprised that she wasn't thrilled. In your other thread you said you had been looking into Orthodoxy for 2 years. I'm sure she feels a profound sense of loss and depending on how much you had discussed this previously she may even feel that you've been spiritually "cheating" on her. Have patience with her feelings - it will take time. Hopefully you(plural) can view this as a time to grow closer in your marriage and improve your communication. Perhaps you can even take up a period of inquiry together and at least help her get all her questions answered - do it as a team.

My husband and I are going through a really rough time right now in a very similar way. It is miserable but the greatest blessing has been a new ability to discuss spiritual matters together in a way we never could up until this point in our marriage. That is just one fruit and I know there are more to come because God is SO Good. I will keep you and your wife in my prayers and please keep us in yours. 

Offline JimCBrooklyn

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It can feel like a breech of trust when a spouse receives a "surprise" regarding the other's deeply held belief. If you really just "told" her I am not at all surprised that she wasn't thrilled. In your other thread you said you had been looking into Orthodoxy for 2 years. I'm sure she feels a profound sense of loss and depending on how much you had discussed this previously she may even feel that you've been spiritually "cheating" on her. Have patience with her feelings - it will take time. Hopefully you(plural) can view this as a time to grow closer in your marriage and improve your communication. Perhaps you can even take up a period of inquiry together and at least help her get all her questions answered - do it as a team.

My husband and I are going through a really rough time right now in a very similar way. It is miserable but the greatest blessing has been a new ability to discuss spiritual matters together in a way we never could up until this point in our marriage. That is just one fruit and I know there are more to come because God is SO Good. I will keep you and your wife in my prayers and please keep us in yours. 

I second that. The initial talks that my wife and I had were tough, but they did put God right in the middle of the family table, so to speak, and through that a true unity in faith developed between us. Now we say our prayer rule together, when just a year ago, I believe both of us would have felt quite awkward about this (for one, we were in different churches, but we did not share in each other's lives of faith at all, really).
It is not the task of Christianity to provide easy answers to every question, but to make us progressively aware of a mystery. God is not so much the object of our knowledge as the cause of our wonder.
-Metropolitan Kallistos Ware

Offline NMHS

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I wouldn't say that I exactly surprised her as I kept her in the loop, and she expected it at some time.  Just not at that time. :o 

We both need to continue to grow.  Time will tell.


It can feel like a breech of trust when a spouse receives a "surprise" regarding the other's deeply held belief. If you really just "told" her I am not at all surprised that she wasn't thrilled. In your other thread you said you had been looking into Orthodoxy for 2 years. I'm sure she feels a profound sense of loss and depending on how much you had discussed this previously she may even feel that you've been spiritually "cheating" on her. Have patience with her feelings - it will take time. Hopefully you(plural) can view this as a time to grow closer in your marriage and improve your communication. Perhaps you can even take up a period of inquiry together and at least help her get all her questions answered - do it as a team.

My husband and I are going through a really rough time right now in a very similar way. It is miserable but the greatest blessing has been a new ability to discuss spiritual matters together in a way we never could up until this point in our marriage. That is just one fruit and I know there are more to come because God is SO Good. I will keep you and your wife in my prayers and please keep us in yours. 

Offline mabsoota

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may God continue to lead us all to grow in our spiritual journey, and also in our families.
the devil does not like it when families are strong, loving each other and close to God, and he will irritate us and cause us to argue whenever he can.
let us stay close to God and remember ephesians 6.

Offline Rdunbar123

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I am going to convert(i am not yet a catechumen) from RC to WRO. My problem is slightly different as my wife converted to RC from Church of Christ after we married. I did not push and we had been married about 7 years. We have now been married 40 and I have been talking about why I am considering EO for the last two years. She agrees on many points and is going to start attending some services with me( i have only attended two but am going to start attending weekly). I guess what i am saying is in my experience, take it slowly both for yourself and your spouse. For the time i will attend both services. God Bless and pray for all people considering converting.  One other thing I read by some poster on this site is not to change denominations because you are mad at yours, but because you love the other and are prayerfully convinced it is true.

Offline ignatius

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I have heard that some Roman Catholic priests are supportive when one of their parishioners feels drawn to the Orthodox Church. If your priest is, maybe he can relieve your wife of some of her concerns.

My Catholic Parish Priest is supportive with me and my interests in Orthodoxy.
St Basil the Great (330-379 A.D.): “I think then that the one goal of all who are really and truly serving the Lord ought to be to bring back to union the churches who have at different times and in diverse manners divided from one another.”

Offline mabsoota

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may God bless him, and give us all wisdom and patience, as well as loving enthusiasm  :)