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Author Topic: A bit of a sticky situation  (Read 416 times) Average Rating: 0
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casisthename
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« on: March 16, 2011, 04:53:36 PM »

hello everyone,

I've been discussing with my parents my interest in the Orthodox church. My parents are very much against the idea. I have been attending mass while at school. However, my parents told me that they will require all who live under their roof to attend church with them at their home church. So, I'm not sure what to do for school breaks. A week here and there is one thing but I don't want to go nearly 4 months during the summer without going to mass. They also told me that they do not want me even considering becoming a catechumen before I graduate college. (which will not be for 3 years) Has anyone dealt with this sort of situation? Any idea how to get around this issue?
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Shlomlokh
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« Reply #1 on: March 16, 2011, 10:58:51 PM »

hello everyone,

I've been discussing with my parents my interest in the Orthodox church. My parents are very much against the idea. I have been attending mass while at school. However, my parents told me that they will require all who live under their roof to attend church with them at their home church. So, I'm not sure what to do for school breaks. A week here and there is one thing but I don't want to go nearly 4 months during the summer without going to mass. They also told me that they do not want me even considering becoming a catechumen before I graduate college. (which will not be for 3 years) Has anyone dealt with this sort of situation? Any idea how to get around this issue?
Many folks here have dealt with the situation and I'm sure they will be glad to be of more help than I am. I converted, but I was a college sophomore so my parents didn't have much say in the matter. I do understand their feelings and if you haven't tried to do that yet, it would probably be good for them to at least know that you are aware of their concerns even if you disagree with them. Smiley Obviously, it would be good to get in touch with an Orthodox priest and speak to him about these things on a fairly regular basis. But Orthodoxy is about living the faith. To do that, you'll need some tools. Cheesy

There are things you can do in the meantime like doing prayers in the morning and evening. I would recommend getting a good prayerbook (if you have the means to do so, if not there are excellent online copies that you could print out for yourself) among the most popular are the Jordanville Prayerbook, but there are others that different people prefer. As long as it is Orthodox, you're good to go. The Menologion is a great tool for daily scripture readings, lives of the saints, etc. Also, the Prologue of Ohrid by St. Nicholas of Zhica is indispensable.

And welcome! Smiley

In Christ,
Andrew
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"I will pour out my prayer unto the Lord, and to Him will I proclaim my grief; for with evils my soul is filled, and my life unto hades hath drawn nigh, and like Jonah I will pray: From corruption raise me up, O God." -Ode VI, Irmos of the Supplicatory Canon to the Theotokos
IsmiLiora
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« Reply #2 on: March 16, 2011, 11:05:18 PM »

My parents never forced me to attend their church, but they were pretty angry when I had my born again experience.

For months at a time I did end up going to church with them and I just set up a prayer area in my room. I also talked to people from the church a few times a week, wrote e-mails, played my worship CDs and went to Catholic Mass on Sundays.

I would definitely talk to your priest and pray about it.  I was a college freshman when I became a charismatic Christian (LOL no such thing as converting!) and I admittedly did defy them on it. I didn't ask for their permission and just went to the church when I was back at college.

I don't know. I really don't want to encourage a child disobeying his or her parents (although God knows I've done that with my own spiritual life  Undecided) but I do feel like my relationship with God overrides my relationship with them. (I might have told them this several times....I recommend that you DON'T take that approach.)

Pray about it and talk to your priest.  You are over 18, and yes, you are in their own house...I don't know. I am okay with curfews, chores and any type of rules (I moved back briefly before I got married), but I had a big issue when my parents tried to interfere with my church life.

I DO understand how you don't want to miss Sundays at the Orthodox Church, though! I'm a new inquirer and I throw a fit when my husband has to work on Sunday morning.


Lord have mercy! Best of luck.
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FormerReformer
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« Reply #3 on: March 16, 2011, 11:06:43 PM »

Not to encourage rebellion, but are you at least 18?  I told my parents to take a long walk off a short pier when it came to religious issues at that time.  Embarrassing prayer requests ("For the [insert parents' denomination here] church that it might be saved" worked well for me) that get the deacons/elders/whatever knocking on your door can help.  On a more respectful note you could always talk to your parents' pastor and explain to him (or her, if it's that kind of denomination) what your issues are and request he/she speak to your parents about backing off.
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"Funny," said Lancelot, "how the people who can't pray say that prayers are not answered, however much the people who can pray say they are."  TH White

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