I think you just need to get to know your parish priest. Quite a lot of them are good men, erudite, kind, willing to help. Don't ask many questions at once; rather, just communicate, share, tell the priest about your life. Then, ask this ONE question that seems to bother you the most. I hope you will get a good answer. If not, be patient, ask again. If you still do not get any answer and you really have reasons to believe that your parish priest is incompetent - change your parish. But I somehow do not think you will really have to do that.
The Lord be with you. Best wishes.