Topic: singles?

[JamesR]

I have to get a picture of myself in order for Michael to give to her, anyone here good at photoshop? Maybe take my face and put it on the body of the guy on the cover of those muscle/fitness magazines?

[Shiny]

Yeah I could do it, I just need a good headshot of you though. Maybe have the lighting facing directly on your face.

Although yours is gonna have to wait. I have something much more important to work on at the moment that came up a few weeks ago.

[Karaleighmum]

this is definitely one of the funnier threads i've seen thus far

[Trebor135]

I'm twenty-two, a guy, and living in Ontario, Canada.

It's going to be hard finding potential candidates for marriage, since I'm converting to Eastern Orthodoxy in a pretty secular country where the Christians in large numbers are Catholic and Protestant and I'd like the household not to be divided at all in matters of faith. Plus, I'm still in university and not entirely sure what I want to do with my life. Under the right circumstances, a girlfriend might be nice to have, but I'm not staying awake thinking about how lonely I am or anything. Not having access to the sacraments yet is far more important to me.

[Alpo]

I have to get a picture of myself in order for Michael to give to her, anyone here good at photoshop? Maybe take my face and put it on the body of the guy on the cover of those muscle/fitness magazines?

Glad to help an Orthodox brother in need. Here you are:

[Dominika]

this is definitely one of the funnier threads i've seen thus far

Actually, it's very serious thread. Everybody here try to not be alone The thing is that the posts are quite funny, but the topic itself not really

I have to get a picture of myself in order for Michael to give to her, anyone here good at photoshop? Maybe take my face and put it on the body of the guy on the cover of those muscle/fitness magazines?

Glad to help an Orthodox brother in need. Here you are:

Women don't like men like this 

[Alpo]

Women don't like men like this 

I completely understand that. The smile is really over the top.

James, you might want to work on that before you move to Poland. Remember Orthodox hesychia.

[Anastasia1]

Turning 35 in a couple of months, but still single and proud! 

Yes, but are you a tall, handsome US citizen?

[Anastasia1]

this is definitely one of the funnier threads i've seen thus far

Actually, it's very serious thread. Everybody here try to not be alone The thing is that the posts are quite funny, but the topic itself not really

Sincerity and humanity makes for the best of comedy.

And you are right. Giant muscles that big are gross. That guy probably has no life outside of the gym-no time for his woman either.

[Justin Kissel]

And you are right. Giant muscles that big are gross. That guy probably has no life outside of the gym-no time for his woman either.

I bet he's also gay, vain, is on steroids, is dumb, has small-man complex, and also has a small male sexual organ.

[JamesR]

One look at my "male sexual organs" is probably enough to hook any woman....or send her running for the hills.

[Cyrillic]

One look at my "male sexual organs" is probably enough to hook any woman....or send her running for the hills.

Plural?

[sheenj]

One look at my "male sexual organs" is probably enough to hook any woman....or send her running for the hills.

Plural?

Do I need to bust out the anatomy charts?

[Schultz]

At a recent gig I was playing, a man came up to the door and asked my friend's band War On Women were playing (FYI, they're a pretty aggressive feminist punk rock band).  When informed that they were, he replied, "Hm, I can't get behind that.  They're too hermaphroditic for my tastes," and then left.

JamesR may have just become too hermaphroditic for this board's tastes.

[Cyrillic]

Oh wait, you silly Americans count those as being two sexual organs.

[sheenj]

Oh wait, you silly Americans count those as being two sexual organs.

You're still forgetting the biggest (hehehe) member of the group...

[Cyrillic]

THREE?! 

[Hiwot]

Women don't like men like this 

Thank you!

[sheenj]

THREE?! 

Wait that's not normal?

[Cyrillic]

I...uhm...uhhh

[Hiwot]

At a recent gig I was playing, a man came up to the door and asked my friend's band War On Women were playing (FYI, they're a pretty aggressive feminist punk rock band).  When informed that they were, he replied, "Hm, I can't get behind that.  They're too hermaphroditic for my tastes," and then left.

JamesR may have just become too hermaphroditic for this board's tastes.

LOL

[Hiwot]

I...uhm...uhhh

[JamesR]

Oh wait, you silly Americans count those as being two sexual organs.

Pretty much, yeah--sometimes even THREE!

[Anastasia1]

Do I quote Master of Disguise on party hors d'oeuvres now or not...

[KBN1]

Do I quote Master of Disguise on party hors d'oeuvres now or not...

Wait, you can quote Master of Disguise?

[Anastasia1]

Do I quote Master of Disguise on party hors d'oeuvres now or not...

Wait, you can quote Master of Disguise?

Well, this is what came to mind when I last read this thread. "Do you have a little wiener and some tiny nuts?"
http://youtu.be/RRa2B4-NLbI

[That person]

One look at my "male sexual organs" is probably enough to hook any woman....or send her running for the hills.

Is anyone else puzzled by the quotation marks here?

[Aindriú]

One look at my "male sexual organs" is probably enough to hook any woman....or send her running for the hills.

Is anyone else puzzled by the quotation marks here?

JamesR is actually an octopus, and that's not even his final form.

[William]

One look at my "male sexual organs" is probably enough to hook any woman....or send her running for the hills.

Is anyone else puzzled by the quotation marks here?

I gotta admit I laughed at this one.

[biro]

One look at my "male sexual organs" is probably enough to hook any woman....or send her running for the hills.

Is anyone else puzzled by the quotation marks here?

JamesR is actually an octopus, and that's not even his final form.

Oh dear 

Makes me think of the Gamera movies for some reason.

[Nadege]

I've said it before, and I'll say it again; the Evangelical purity-ring wearing woman is perhaps the most insane, frightening woman you could end up with (next to Rosie O'Donnell). They are the kind who will ask about marriage on the first date, expect to be treated like royalty by you, and want to introduce you to their equally insane family and talk about having six kids someday.

I am 34 and divorced and love my purity ring.  Not only I'm actually not practicing extramarital sex, but it also looks just like a standard silver wedding band and keeps (most) men from bothering me.

[NicholasMyra]

For JamesR:

http://forgivenjewelry.com/chastity-and-abstinence-rings/true-love-waits-spanish-gold-finish-sizes-6-9

[NicholasMyra]

[Nadege]

Wow, beautiful!

[Tikhon.of.Colorado]

I just want a woman that's decently attractive, doesn't carry too much emotional baggage, can cook and won't interfere too much in my religious life.

James, you remind me of a funny event.  At Orthodox summer camp, the priests were talking to us about our future spouses.  We were to say things we would want in a spouse, and one of the boys said they wanted a girl that was "submissive."  The tension after that comment could be cut with a knife.  Let me tell you, the girls didn't talk to him for the rest of camp!

In other news, this thread gives me so many giggles.  I miss ismi, though.  I wonder if she's still active here.

[vamrat]

I just want a woman that's decently attractive, doesn't carry too much emotional baggage, can cook and won't interfere too much in my religious life.

James, you remind me of a funny event.  At Orthodox summer camp, the priests were talking to us about our future spouses.  We were to say things we would want in a spouse, and one of the boys said they wanted a girl that was "submissive."  The tension after that comment could be cut with a knife.  Let me tell you, the girls didn't talk to him for the rest of camp!

In other news, this thread gives me so many giggles.  I miss ismi, though.  I wonder if she's still active here.

The word submissive has taken on different connotations.  It's generally thought of as a bad thing.  Perhaps the poor bloke just thought he was using it the biblical way where the man is in charge in the relationship.  I highly doubt he was looking for a BDSM partner at an Orthodox summer camp.

And I share in the Ismi missing.

[Justin Kissel]

I highly doubt he was looking for a BDSM partner at an Orthodox summer camp.

Really. There are already perfectly good websites for that!

[Alpo]

I highly doubt he was looking for a BDSM partner at an Orthodox summer camp.

Really. There are already perfectly good websites for that!

For finding Orthodox BDSM partners?

[Justin Kissel]

I highly doubt he was looking for a BDSM partner at an Orthodox summer camp.

Really. There are already perfectly good websites for that!

For finding Orthodox BDSM partners?

Sure, I know a fetish/bdsm site that has an Orthodox discussion group on it. Though the numbers are currently rather low.

[Cyrillic]

I highly doubt he was looking for a BDSM partner at an Orthodox summer camp.

Really. There are already perfectly good websites for that!

For finding Orthodox BDSM partners?

Sure, I know a fetish/bdsm site that has an Orthodox discussion group on it. Though the numbers are currently rather low.

 

[Alpo]

Eww! Too much information!

[augustin717]

I highly doubt he was looking for a BDSM partner at an Orthodox summer camp.

Really. There are already perfectly good websites for that!

For finding Orthodox BDSM partners?

Sure, I know a fetish/bdsm site that has an Orthodox discussion group on it. Though the numbers are currently rather low.

Is it about wearing tortuously long headscarves?

[Alpo]

I don't recognize augustin717's posts anymore due to such a light-colored avatar. I want vintage photographs back!

[Romaios]

Is it about wearing tortuously long headscarves?

More likely:

[JamesR]

I'm not too picky; I just want an Orthodox woman who sees me as God in her eyes and will submit to me and obey everything I say.

/misogynist redneck