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Author Topic: LORD OF THE ROAC  (Read 6596 times) Average Rating: 0
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Robert
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« on: December 14, 2003, 01:14:37 AM »

One ROAC to rule them all,
One ROAC to find them,
One ROAC to bring them all,
and in the DARKNESS bind them.

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« Reply #1 on: December 14, 2003, 01:17:09 AM »

har har, trying to start a flame war again?
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« Reply #2 on: December 14, 2003, 01:18:54 AM »

Lord of the RCC

One RCC to rule them all,
One RCC to find them,
One RCC to bring them all,
and in the DARKNESS bind them.
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« Reply #3 on: December 14, 2003, 01:26:56 AM »

Lord of the RCC

One RCC to rule them all,
One RCC to find them,
One RCC to bring them all,
and in the DARKNESS bind them.

I don't think Tolkien would appreciate this last adaption of his famous rhyme.

But he did name an old raven in The Hobbit "Roac," didn't he?
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« Reply #4 on: December 14, 2003, 04:01:27 AM »

Yes, he did.

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« Reply #5 on: December 14, 2003, 11:31:33 AM »

Tolkien

Would've liked this:

Lord of the RCC

One RCC to rule them all in love
One RCC to find them
One RCC to bring them all
and in the light bind them.

It probably sounds better in Elvish  Grin

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« Reply #6 on: December 14, 2003, 09:12:51 PM »

I really want to learn Elvish.  Anyone know of any classes offered anywhere?  

(I'm glad my wife is not here right now -- she'd call me a big DORK!)
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« Reply #7 on: December 14, 2003, 10:42:57 PM »

I know I've seen something about that... I'll check for you.

"Elen sila lumenn omentielvo" - "A star shines at the hour of our meeting."  Wink

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Edited to correct spelling...it's 2 n's in lumenn
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« Reply #8 on: December 15, 2003, 01:23:18 AM »

I really want to learn Elvish.  Anyone know of any classes offered anywhere?  

(I'm glad my wife is not here right now -- she'd call me a big DORK!)

You could study Finnish; that's what I heard Tolkien modelled his Elvish language on.

But beware: Finnish has, if I recall correctly, 13 grammatical cases!
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« Reply #9 on: December 15, 2003, 01:26:17 AM »

That's a great pic you posted, David.

I knew that old raven's name was Roac, although it's been quite awhile since I last read The Hobbit.

As I recall, Thorin sends him to fetch his cousin, Dain of the Iron Hills, and his dwarvish army.

When is Peter Jackson going to do The Hobbit?

I sure wish he would!
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« Reply #10 on: December 15, 2003, 01:36:12 AM »

He said in an interview he plans to start working on it after he finishes King Kong which he is working on now.
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« Reply #11 on: December 15, 2003, 01:46:16 PM »

king kong??  like that movie needed to be remade Roll Eyes
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« Reply #12 on: December 15, 2003, 01:52:23 PM »

Jackson has said that King Kong has always been the most important film to him, as it got him into movies.  I expect it should be a sight to see.
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« Reply #13 on: December 15, 2003, 01:58:05 PM »

eck. Lips Sealed

I'd rather see a remake of battle beyond the Stars Cheesy of course very few people have ever even heard of the movie let alone seen it . . . but . . . .

I have my ticket to see Return of the King Grin  I just read that they cut over an HOUR out of the theatrical release!  I'm going to DIE waiting for the DVD extended version!!
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« Reply #14 on: December 15, 2003, 03:05:54 PM »

Battle Beyond the Stars!!! I haven't seen that in years.  Can't say that I am anxiosly awaiting a remake though.

RE: ROTK-They cut an hour and it is still 3 hours and 15 minutes!
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« Reply #15 on: December 15, 2003, 03:47:17 PM »

test
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« Reply #16 on: December 15, 2003, 06:58:46 PM »

According to articles last week, while Peter Jackson would like to make "The Hobbit", it's not happening soon.  Professor Tolkien sold the rights for filming LotR only.  The ones for "Hobbit" are owned by the Tolkien family foundation and Christopher Tolkien isn't keen on films of his father's work.  Otoh, Simon Tolkien (C.'s son) *is* and there is some split because of this.  Royd Tolkien (a grandson of C.  is in RotK as a Gondorian soldier.)

"King Kong" is going to be set in the '30's just as the original.  Apparently Jackson offered a cameo to Fay Raye, but she said she's too old to make movies now though she appreciated the courtesy.  I saw a jest last week that asked if Andy Serkis would be the actor behind Kong.  Grin

I remember "Battle beyond the Stars".  Smiley


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« Reply #17 on: December 15, 2003, 07:01:16 PM »



I really want to learn Elvish.  Anyone know of any classes offered anywhere?  

(I'm glad my wife is not here right now -- she'd call me a big DORK!)

Here's a lexicon of Quenya: http://www.uib.no/People/hnohf/qlist.htm

Or did you want Sindarin?  Wink  I'll check for more, if you like.

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« Reply #18 on: December 16, 2003, 12:46:34 AM »

wow I'm not the only one who remembers that movie lol  Battle beyond the Stars is a classic in its own right . . . . a couple more days til the big event!!
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« Reply #19 on: December 16, 2003, 03:25:35 AM »

A little Foxtrot fun to tide us over...

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« Reply #20 on: December 16, 2003, 03:26:15 AM »

And another one...

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« Reply #21 on: December 16, 2003, 03:36:51 AM »

Actually, according to this, Christopher Tolkien doesn't own the rights to the Hobbit either.   Apparantly New Line owns the rights to make the film, but United Artists owns the rights to distribute the film.  According to that site, the only rights the Tolkien estate owns are The Silmarillion and the other minor Middle-Earth books.
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« Reply #22 on: December 16, 2003, 04:46:44 AM »

Battle beyond the Stars is a classic in its own right

Now that was a forgettable movie. Johnboy Walton piloting a spaceship with breasts Roll Eyes
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« Reply #23 on: December 16, 2003, 08:48:44 AM »

You people are Geeks.  Wink
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« Reply #24 on: December 16, 2003, 02:31:33 PM »

LOTR humor (geek mode on)

I found this on another forum, and thought it was great. Come up with the best combo of LOTR and another movie. Some examples written so far:

Deliverance from the Ring.
After getting separated, Frodo and Sam are found in the wilderness by a group of redneck trolls who torment them endlessly.

Requiem for a Ring.
Despite Gandalf's insistence, Frodo refuses to leave the Shire, he and Sam and Rosy get into heroin and begin a downward spiral that ends up with Sam and and Frodo being jailed in the south of middle earth and Sam losing his arm to an infection.

Shire History X.
Frodo, Pippin and Merry become influenced by anti-establishment elements in the Shire, Frodo gets a big Sauron tatoo on his chest, and finally goes to jail for killing an elf, where he he is redeemed and comes back to try to save Merry and Pippin from a life of hate.

Hobbitz in the Shire.
A downturn in the Shire economy plunge Sam, Frodo, Merry and Pippin into a world of fast horses, cross bows, and pipe weed. Can they find their way through this maze of limitations and disappointments and violence to become well adjusted men?

The Underhill Identity.
Frodo is discovered floating down stream in the Brandywine and can't remember his name, but he has a message embedded in his hip that holds a numbered bar tab at the Prancing Pony. Can he discover who he is before the secret forces of Saruman can plug this leak in their secret weapon's program?

Kill Bill Vol3.
The pony, left behind at the Gates of Moria, is now consumed with rage over his betrayal. He embarks on a vengeful, hate-filled rampage and he's headed directly for the Shire! An anguished Samwise must hunt down his once faithful companion and end this reign of terror.

The Mordor Job
After bringing the ring to the center of Mt. Doom Sam double crosses Frodo and company and runs off with the Ring, killing Aragorn in the process. Frodo and the other survivors band together with Aragorn's secret half-elf love-child when she becomes of age to track down Sam and retrieve the ring. They do so riding on brightly colored Ponys that seem incredibly fast and agile and go places regular horses can't.

Fear and Loathing in Lothlorian
Raul Dunedain and Dr Glorfindel attempt to dive into the heart of the Numenorian dream by covering the Mirkwood 4000. Fueled only by Lembas, Maggots special reserve and pipeweed they break all the rules, burn the help, insult the tourists and dont pay the tab.

Reservoir Hobbits
After a discussing how much a tip should be. The Hobbits rob a jewery store and get a suitcase with a speical ring inside.... The only problem, one of the Hobits is a cop......

Fangorn Gump
This one would be worth it just for the scene depicting the March of the Ents, with a pretty blonde yelling, "Run, Forest, Run!"

Bright Oil Lamps, Big City
After being brought to Minas Tirith, Pippin falls in with a fast crowd of young Gondorians and falls into a life of partying and drugs.

Dude, Where's My Ring?
Sauron and Saruman are two blithering idiots who seem to have misplaced the One Ring... Dude, Where's my ring? Where's your ring dude?

Lothlorien In Translation
Two hobbits longing for home find themselves out of their element. Comedy ensues.

Ring It On
Low budget, high return movie centering on a bunch of hobbit cheerleaders obsessed with firstly, getting their routine right and winning the championship and secondly, vanquishing evil by destroying an evil toe ring.

My Cousin Gimli
Hilarious LOTR prequel where we meet Balin, who finds himslelf wrongfully accused while traveling through Rivendell! What else to do but call his street-smart but inexperienced dwarf warrior Gimli who may be a little too "rough around the edges" for the Rivendell justice system!

Bend It Like Boromir
Boromir, driven mad by his lust for the One Ring, runs away to coach an elven all-girls soccer team. Against the will of his father, and through dedication and alterior motives, he proceeds to take them to the championship game at Pelennor Fields.

Fast Times At Uruk-Hai
Those gnarly Hobbit dudes are all about babes, parties and pipeweed, bro. Even when held captive by the righteous yet totally bogus enemy. Co-starring Salma Uruk-Hayek.

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« Reply #25 on: December 16, 2003, 03:56:56 PM »

If LOTR was written by Dr. Seuss


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
GREEN EGGS AND LEMBAS - Excerpt from a screenplay for THE LORD OF THE RINGS

by Whistler

(Scene: Bag End, after Bilbo’s party)

GANDALF:
That Samwise-Sam! That Samwise-Sam!
I do not like that Samwise-Sam!

FRODO:
Would you like some bread and jam?

GANDALF:
I do not want your bread and jam.
I’m busy being mad at Sam.
He likes to sneak. He likes to spy.
I’ll grind him up for hobbit pie!

FRODO:
Oh, do not grind him up for pie!
He is a pretty handy guy.
He mows my grass. He paints my gate.
He is my friend. We both are straight.

GANDALF:
Well, then, I will not grind up Sam!
Bring me bread, and bring me jam!
We’ll talk about another thing.
Tell me, do you have the ring?

FRODO:
I have the ring. I have it here.
But, mercy me! Oh, dear! Oh, dear!
I fear the ring is very bad,
The golden ring that Bilbo had!
Tell me, will you take the ring?

GANDALF:
I will not take that evil thing!

FRODO:
Would you, could you, by the fire?
Would you, could you, in the Shire?

GANDALF:
I would not, could not, by the fire.
I would not, could not, in the Shire.

FRODO:
Would you, could you, in a tree?
Would you, on the road to Bree?
Would you, with an orc or troll?
Would you, in a hobbit-hole?

GANDALF:
I would not, could not, in a tree.
I would not, on the road to Bree.
I would not, with an orc or troll.
I would not, in a hobbit-hole.
I will not take it here or there,
I will not take it anywhere!
For it is bad. It’s as you say.
You’ll have to take that ring away
And throw it in the Cracks of Doom!

FRODO:
I’ll need a friend. But who, or whom?

(Gandalf produces Sam, who has been spying)

SAM:
Oh, Master! Master! Sam is here!
He’ll wash me down with beer, I fear!
I do not wish to be a pie!

GANDALF:
I will not eat you, little spy!
But I will send you far away.
You both will go away today.
You’ll go to Bree. A man is there.
The man looks foul. The man feels fair.
He’ll lead you both, if all goes well,
To meet the elves in Rivendell.

SAM:
Oh, Master! We will meet the elves!
We’ll get to meet the elves ourselves
And hear them sing their elven songs!
We’ll hear them bong their elven-gongs
And strum their elven loola-lutes!
They’ll hoot their elven hooty-toots!

GANDALF:
I hope you’ll hear those loola-lutes
And hear the hoots of hooty-toots!
But go with care. To be a pie
Is better than to meet the Eye!
The Eye is mean. The Eye is red.
He rules nine Riders. They are dead.
They’ll try to make you dead, as well.
But will they catch you? Time will tell!

FRODO:
Oh, dear! Oh, dear! This is a mess!
We’ll have to fix this mess, I guess.
So we will go, just Sam and me.
And what will happen? We will see!

(Fade)

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« Reply #26 on: December 16, 2003, 04:26:36 PM »

The Wizard, by Edgar Allen Poe

by mocroidh

Once upon a morning sunny, while I breakfasted, eggs so runny,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of elvish lore-
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of someone gently rapping, rapping at my Bag-End door.
"Tis some relative," I muttered, "tapping at my Bag-End door-
Only this and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the late September;
And each separate hobbit wrought requests upon my door.
Eagerly I wished the evening;-when I would be softly leaving
From my home in the West Farthing-for an elven shore-
For the rare and radiant Rivendell, told in elven lore-
Imladris here for evermore.

And the shiny, tempting feeling of my secret ring
Thrilled me-filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating
"Tis some relative entreating entrance at my Bag-End door-
Some blasted relative entreating entrance at my Bag-End door;-
This is it and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew strong; hesitating then no longer,
"Sir," said I, "or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;
But the fact is I am not admitting, definitely not admitting
Anyone except upon official party business, I implore.
Go away!" said I-and then a voice outside the door;-
"What about old friends?" it said, and nothing more.

Open wide the door flinging, long I stood there wondering, fearing
Doubting, dreaming dreams no hobbit ever dared to dream before
But my eyes did not deceive me, for there stood tall before me
My old friend the wizard Gandalf, beloved the Shire o'er!
My dear friend the wizard Gandalf, whom I had known before.
"Come in, come in," said I, and behind him shut the door.
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« Reply #27 on: December 16, 2003, 06:30:32 PM »

Battle beyond the Stars is a classic in its own right

Now that was a forgettable movie. Johnboy Walton piloting a spaceship with breasts Roll Eyes


HEY to a 6 year old boy - the movie was great and the ship was AWSOME!!  Besides it in effect started the modern Sci-fi epics
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« Reply #28 on: December 16, 2003, 07:33:12 PM »

You people are Geeks.  Wink

And proud of it....  Grin  Grin Grin

Whatever is the case, filming "The Hobbit" sounds like it will be complicated.  I for one have a hard time imagining "The Silmarillion" being made into a movie, so it's probably best that the rights were not sold.

Great parodies, David.  It's nice that the writers had a sense of scansion and rhyme pattern.  I've heard/read too many filks/parodies that didn't and it was painful.

Ebor
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« Reply #29 on: December 16, 2003, 10:24:49 PM »

there is no way to make a movie covering the whole book,I mean it is basically the bible of Middle Earth . . . but they could lift a story or two out of it . . . .
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« Reply #30 on: December 16, 2003, 10:32:54 PM »

I'd like to see a good Dune movie or a good version of the Chroniles of Narnia or even one of Anne McCafferys books done into a movie. Smiley
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« Reply #31 on: December 16, 2003, 11:04:58 PM »

The Sci-fi version was AWFUL.  I watched it, but could not STOMACH it!!  they mutilated he story line, had lousy actors, did not develop the characters at all - and the effects were kindergarten quality.  The 80s version with sting at least had great effects - especially for the day, decent actors, good character development - yes the deviated from the storyline, but they did not mutilate it like the remake did. THEN to cram TWO books together for the sequil??  The writer and the director should BOTH stand before the firing squad.
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« Reply #32 on: December 16, 2003, 11:46:20 PM »

don't waste your time.  It's long and dull and dumb.  I don't mind a long movie if it is intersting. Smiley  Going to see ROTK on Thursday Grin
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« Reply #33 on: December 17, 2003, 09:40:03 AM »

I liked the Sci-Fi Channel version of Dune and Children of Dune a great deal.  I thought it follwed the books better than the 80's version with Sting.

I guess it is a matter of taste, but I would recommend the Sci-Fi Channel versions of Dune.
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« Reply #34 on: December 17, 2003, 10:11:34 AM »

I guess I'm a purist who likes good acting Wink
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« Reply #35 on: December 17, 2003, 12:30:48 PM »

So David... (who was one of the lucky people who went to see Return of the King at midnight...) how was it???
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« Reply #36 on: December 17, 2003, 01:00:50 PM »

Friends,

Being the geek that I am I went to the midnight show and all I can say is awesome. Two thumbs and two hairy hobbit big toes up!  God bless J.R.R. Tolkein for giving us these stories and God bless Peter Jackson and the cast and crew for doing such a wonderful job on these movies.

Fr. Deacon Lance
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« Reply #37 on: December 17, 2003, 05:48:53 PM »

Ania,

I, like Dn. Lance, was at the Midnight showing, along with my roomate and his parents(his dad is an OCA priest).  See the "Thou Art Peter Jackson" thread for more.  Incredible.  Takes the first two movies, and puts the third into an entirely new level.  Axios! Smiley
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« Reply #38 on: December 17, 2003, 10:39:40 PM »

Wow!

Rhys-Davies is my hero!
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« Reply #39 on: December 18, 2003, 12:46:42 PM »

Wow!

Rhys-Davies is my hero!

You said it--Go, Gimli!!!
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« Reply #40 on: December 19, 2003, 01:08:35 AM »

Peter Jackson RULES!!! Grin I love him!!  I'm sure that Tolkein is applauding from Heaven!
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« Reply #41 on: December 23, 2003, 10:21:37 AM »

Sorry to sound sacraligious here...  but I went to see LOTR ROTK Friday, and while I found the first 3 hours very good, after the battle of Gondor it got a little stale...  not that I'm bashing the film or anything, it's just not as great as I expected it to be.
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« Reply #42 on: December 23, 2003, 11:27:13 AM »

Sorry to sound sacraligious here...  but I went to see LOTR ROTK Friday, and while I found the first 3 hours very good, after the battle of Gondor it got a little stale...  not that I'm bashing the film or anything, it's just not as great as I expected it to be.

Sacralege!!!!   Shocked

In all seriousness, the last 20 minutes are supposed to be a "winding down", so to speak, and in the book it is even more so.  That's why it seemed to some people to have ended multiple times.   I hardly thought it was stale--I got choked up 2-3 times during that last half hour.  :'(
Now I can't wait to see it again, and I'm really looking forward to the expanded version of ROTK!  Smiley
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« Reply #43 on: December 23, 2003, 12:10:11 PM »

I too wished the part after the battles would go on for at least an hour.  One thing to keep in mind is that though the three parts were released seperately, it is one ten hour long movie and as such there is too much character involvment to wrap things up in a standard five minute denouement.  

It's still 97% fresh at www.rottentomatoes.com out of 167 reviews for those of you who are familiar with the site.  In it's 5 day opening week(Wed-Sun), RotK made $125 million domestically.
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« Reply #44 on: December 23, 2003, 12:39:48 PM »

Well, I've read the trilogy, multiple times, & I know in the end it tells about all that happens to everyone, which is why i was a bit disapointed that it only focused on the hobbits, rather than say what happened to Aragon, Gimli, etc...  Also it didn't say that Sam, toward the end of his life, also went to the Elves.
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