Re: pray for this to end - Counsels

[jnorm888]

I am a celibate homosexual. Try telling my mind that however. I want to be totally cured of this horrific sinful passion but every prayer of mine has been ignored for years now. I started liking this girl for a while but it was only temporary, and it was almost not for real. So. Please pray for me intensely if you can because this is driving me away from faith and making me contemplate suicide, as if that matters, as it says in the bible, such people will not inherit the kingdom of God. So what's the point of living? And what's the mistake in suicide?

You are not the only person on the board with homosexual tendencies/propensities. And you are not the only person on the board who struggles with lust in general. If you do a search I'm sure you will find others who are dealing with the samething.

We are all born with a certain cross to bare. We are all born with tendencies/propensities that we have to fight/control/master, and as a person, you are more than just your sexual attraction.......that shouldn't define who you are and what you are as a person.......for you are much more than just a sexual desire for the same sex. And if you fall, just get back up and try again, don't get mad at yourself, don't beat yourself up.......just get back up and try again.

So don't let that limit your identity, and don't be upset about the woman you liked for a time. To be honest, out of 1,000 women, I am probably only sexually attracted to about 300 to about 400.

I have no sexual feelings, desire, attraction to about half the women I meet. Talking to them is no different than talking to a family member or a male friend....I talk to them as if they were a male friend. For I have no desire no nothing. Alot of men feel that Halle Berry is sexually attractive, but when I look at her, I feel nothing. No sexual attraction, no nothing, so if I ever got a chance to talk to her, it would be as if I was talking to a male friend. Now I do find Tara Wall sexually attractive, and so our bodies find certain physical traits attractive.

So don't feel bad about that. And if we really wanted to be honest, alot of people that would call themself "Heterosexual" are actually sexually attracted to "some" men.

Now their ratio maybe different from someone who would call themself "homosexual". For a heterosexual......out of 1,000 men, they might be sexually attracted to about 10 men, where as a homosexual might be sexually attracted to 300 men out of 1,000.

Also, a number of self professed heterosexuals will find "some" Transsexuals sexually attractive.....especially the ones that are able to pass as a woman.

And for a sexually active heterosexual male that goes to prison, they will have a hard time in "not" sleeping with the same sex.

And so, what this tells me is, the issue is a bit complex. A good number of homosexuals are sexually aroused by some "people" of the opposite sex. The problem is that they still want someone of the same sex.

That's the problem, and this is the real life situation of alot of homosexuals in the closet.

So, if you ever find another woman that you are sexually attracted to, just tell her the truth of your sexual tendencies/propensities and what you struggle with.......don't hide it from her. For she will need to know this if you are going to get married. And don't be afraid of learning to live with this tendency for the rest of your life.....in the sameway alcoholics must live with alcoholism for the rest of their life.












ICXC NIKA

[Papist]

I understand that the bearing of the cross of homosexual desires can be extermely difficult. But I also know that it can be a matter of great purification and sanctification. I believe that St. John of the Cross' work "The Dark Night of the Soul" is extermely useful for a person that must avoid romantic intimacy. Of course he's a Catholic Saint so you may not want to go there. Just a suggestion.

[Heorhij]

Planetary, - I sent you a PM. Please feel free to write to me, as I do have some family history that includes both things that seem to worry you so much (suicide and homosexuality). I would be happy to help by sharing whatever I know about these matters. Most importantly, please do remember that you are a unique and most precious child of God Who loves you and cares about you, and that many people care about you as well. My unworthy prayer your way.

[believer74]

God understands you. He really, really does. He knows you care about doing what's right and how hard it all is for you. You can't help how you feel. Unconscious feelings aren't wrong, they just "are".
 With prayers,

[Gebre Menfes Kidus]

One small thing that might help is to stop thinking of yourself and identifying yourself as a "celibate homosexual." Simply think of yourself and identify yourself as an Orthodox Christian. Your true identity is in Christ, and the more you focus on that the better. This is true for all of us. Most of us identify ourselves by our careers, our political affiliation, our talents, our looks, our achievements, our academic degrees, etc. But all these things are superficial and ultimately unreal, and yet we find ourselves living and acting according to them. This hinders our Christian growth and sets us up for insecurity and arrogance. But when we focus on our true identity which is in Christ and His Church, then we will remain humble and hopeful, and we will become increasingly conformed to the Lord Who loves us unconditionally and completely.

Peace to you.

Selam

[Tags:]

OrthodoxChristianity.net > Moderated Forums > Free-For-All > Religious Topics (Moderator: Carl Kraeff (Second Chance)) > Topic: Re: pray for this to end - Counsels