Author Topic: In pain and extremely angry  (Read 1782 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline StGeorge

  • High Elder
  • ******
  • Posts: 714
  • St. George
In pain and extremely angry
« on: October 08, 2009, 09:33:29 PM »
I'm in a lot of pain right now.  The pain just keeps on getting worse.  I'm wondering if life is worth living.  Worse of all, the saints, the Theotokos and God do not seem to care.  Please pray for me.  Thanks. 

Offline HandmaidenofGod

  • Archon
  • ********
  • Posts: 3,397
  • O Holy St. Demetrius pray to God for us!
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #1 on: October 08, 2009, 09:37:19 PM »
Through the prayers of St. Seraphim of Sarov, may you be healed!
"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jer 29:11

Offline livefreeordie

  • High Elder
  • ******
  • Posts: 752
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #2 on: October 08, 2009, 09:39:45 PM »
I'll pray for you.  I've been there, so much pain I rolled up in bed for days and just waited from something to kill me.  Don't be afraid to pray, and pray with tears.  Cry out to God, even if your angry. You can make it through this.

Offline Rosehip

  • Archon
  • ********
  • Posts: 2,760
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #3 on: October 08, 2009, 09:41:43 PM »
StGeorge, I understand your cry so well...

May you be loved and healed!

May you receive healing through the prayers of St Panteleimon!
+ Our dear sister Martha (Rosehip) passed away on Dec 20, 2010.  May her memory be eternal! +

Offline HandmaidenofGod

  • Archon
  • ********
  • Posts: 3,397
  • O Holy St. Demetrius pray to God for us!
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #4 on: October 08, 2009, 09:47:00 PM »
Christian Prayer in a Time of Anxiety
Fr. Ted Wojcik
http://www.orthodoxytoday.org/articles/WojcikPrayer.php



And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith. Matthew 21:22

The events of September 11 were as profound as they were ugly. The evil acts of the few forced many to reevaluate the core values of their lives. Countless people discovered -- or rediscovered -- that family, friends, and spirituality are essential to the social banquet while fame, fortune, and worldliness lack the nourishment that human beings crave.

The evil of terrorism can be visualized in fire, crushing collapse, choking dust, fear, instability, pain, anger, hatred, and death. Every American can tell a story about the impact they experienced on that infamous September Tuesday.

What the future will bring remains a mystery for our society and every family and person. But isn't this what the world has always presented? Hasn't humanity always struggled in order to survive? When did we have such security that there was no fear, anger, and pain?

Every person comes to question the reality of God, of life, and love one day. Those questions are quite normal, especially when the ground that we stand on is rocked by irrationality. The faithful realize that there is indeed a God who embraces His children and nurtures them with a love that overcomes evil, pain, and death.

My own experience proved to me that God answers my questions as long as I remember that there are no right answers to wrong questions.

One beautiful summer evening in 1991 I drove my car to celebrate Vespers in our cemetery chapel. That evening, gasoline seeping from a lawnmower ignited and I suffered first through fourth degree burns over my lower body. The first night doctors considered amputating my legs due to the damage the fire caused. I came home in a medi-van 44 days later, having spent most of the summer in the burn unit of Hennepin County Medical Center.

Due to my weakened physical and mental condition my personal prayers had to be short and to the point. I consumed fair amounts of morphine to control the pain and antibiotics to control any infection. I was exhausted from the stress of trying to heal and grow new skin. My wife told me that I was so sleepy I would fall asleep in the middle of a one word sentence.

How do you pray in those circumstances? What questions do you ask the Lord? What kind of help do you seek when drowning in a fog of chemicals, struggle, pain, instability, and high anxiety? I found comfort in the sacraments and an abbreviated form of the Jesus Prayer.

Soon after my hospitalization, the Primate of the Orthodox Church in America flew to Minnesota from New York in to anoint me with the sacrament of healing and to pray for my family and me. My fellow Orthodox priests brought the Eucharist to me on a regular basis. Thanks be to God and the prayers of people worldwide I survived with only two skin graft operations and months of therapy.

Sacraments are wonderful, but what happens the other 23 and three quarter hours a day? What goes on in one's mind in the dark night when sleep evaporates and the quite darkness sucks hope dry? Why me? What did I do to deserve this? What will happen in the future? Psalm 6 says, "I am weary with my moaning; every night I flood my bed with tears; I drench my couch with my weeping. My eye wastes away because of grief, it grows weak because of all my foes."

I am a stoic person, but in the burn unit morphine and stress caused me to weep with little provocation. Tears came in floods, but there is hope in weeping. Lord Jesus have mercy! The shortened form of the Jesus Prayer became a constant companion. Often the prayer was, "Lord have mercy." In the simplicity of the words, the cry for help became an answer in itself.

I tell people that God will not listen to their prayers if they don't listen to what they are praying. Why should God listen if you don't? By listening to my short prayers, I heard the Lord speak to me. Lord teach me how to pray, pray Thou Thyself in me. It was not my words, but Christ praying in me. He became the focus. He became the question and the answer. Slowly it happened: instability turned into stability, frustration turned to hope. "Depart from me, all you workers of evil; for the Lord has heard the sound of my weeping. The Lord has heard my supplication; the Lord accepts my prayer." (Psalm 6:8-9)

Then I came home. Life continues. Temptations come and go (some not quickly enough!). This was one of a handful of events in my life where I felt the arms of God embrace me and give me peace. My wife and I love each other very much. So far I have married two of our three children. Our oldest son graduated from Notre Dame Law School and our next two sons went to St. Vladimir's Seminary and are ordained Orthodox priests. I have been blessed to baptize our four delightful grandchildren. We know that prayers are answered for those who have faith, even faith the size of a mustard seed.

"Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in our hope of sharing the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit which has been given to us." (Romans 5:1-5)

Fr. Ted Wojcik is an Orthodox priest living in Minnesota. This reflection was offered at an Orthodox - Roman Catholic ecumenical dialogue in St. Paul, Minnesota and is reprinted by permission of the author.
"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jer 29:11

Offline EofK

  • Mrs. Y
  • Protokentarchos
  • *********
  • Posts: 3,976
  • lolcat addict
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #5 on: October 08, 2009, 09:48:42 PM »
Lord, have mercy!
Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. -- Douglas Adams

Offline Entscheidungsproblem

  • Formerly Friul & Nebelpfade
  • Protokentarchos
  • *********
  • Posts: 4,495
    • Amsterdam Declaration 2002
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #6 on: October 08, 2009, 09:52:20 PM »
Lord, have mercy!
As a result of a thousand million years of evolution, the universe is becoming conscious of itself, able to understand something of its past history and its possible future.
-- Sir Julian Sorell Huxley FRS

Offline LizaSymonenko

  • Слава Ісусу Христу!!! Glory to Jesus Christ!!!
  • Global Moderator
  • Toumarches
  • ******
  • Posts: 14,023
    • St.Mary the Protectress Ukrainian Orthodox Cathedral
  • Faith: Eastern Orthodox
  • Jurisdiction: Ukrainian Orthodox Church of the U.S.A.
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #7 on: October 08, 2009, 09:56:42 PM »

StGeorge, you are in my unworthy prayers!

Kontakion, Sixth Tone:

O protection of Christians that cannot be put to shame, O mediation unto the Creator unfailing: Disdain not the suppliant voices of sinners; but be thou quick, O good one, to help us who in faith cry unto thee: Hasten to intercession and speed thou to make supplication, thou who dost ever protect, O Theotokos, them that honour thee.

Amen.



Conquer evil men by your gentle kindness, and make zealous men wonder at your goodness. Put the lover of legality to shame by your compassion. With the afflicted be afflicted in mind. Love all men, but keep distant from all men.
—St. Isaac of Syria

Offline Heorhij

  • Merarches
  • ***********
  • Posts: 8,576
    • Mississippi University for Women
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #8 on: October 08, 2009, 10:13:57 PM »
Lord, have mercy! Praying for you, dear StGeorge.
Love never fails.

Offline ytterbiumanalyst

  • Professor Emeritus, CSA
  • Merarches
  • ***********
  • Posts: 8,790
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #9 on: October 08, 2009, 10:33:16 PM »
Lord have mercy.
"It is remarkable that what we call the world...in what professes to be true...will allow in one man no blemishes, and in another no virtue."--Charles Dickens

Offline GabrieltheCelt

  • Taxiarches
  • **********
  • Posts: 7,014
  • Faith: Eastern Orthodox OCA
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #10 on: October 08, 2009, 10:44:41 PM »
Lord, have mercy!

I'm really sorry friend!  You're in my prayers!  ;)
"The Scots-Irish; Brewed in Scotland, bottled in Ireland, uncorked in America."  ~Scots-Irish saying

Offline SolEX01

  • Toumarches
  • ************
  • Posts: 12,375
    • Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of America
  • Faith: Orthodox
  • Jurisdiction: Metropolis of New Jersey
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #11 on: October 08, 2009, 10:45:38 PM »
Lord have Mercy.

Offline Irish Hermit

  • Kibernetski Kaludjer
  • Merarches
  • ***********
  • Posts: 10,991
  • Holy Father Patrick, pray for us
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #12 on: October 08, 2009, 10:56:40 PM »

"For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord,
plans for your well-being and not for harm, to give you a future with hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11

And read Psalm 40 over and over...

I waited patiently for the Lord;
        he turned to me and heard my cry.

He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
       out of the mud and mire;
       he set my feet on a rock
       and gave me a firm place to stand.
« Last Edit: October 08, 2009, 11:00:21 PM by Irish Hermit »

Offline Riddikulus

  • Protokentarchos
  • *********
  • Posts: 4,788
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #13 on: October 08, 2009, 11:05:01 PM »
Hang in there, StGeorge. Lord, have mercy in this very difficult time.
I believe in One God, maker of heaven and earth and of all things visible and invisible.

Nothing in biology makes sense except in the light of evolution.
Theodosius Dobzhansky, Russian Orthodox Christian (1900-1975)

Offline Salpy

  • Section Moderator
  • Toumarches
  • *****
  • Posts: 13,570
  • Holy Martyrs of the Armenian Genocide pray for us!
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #14 on: October 08, 2009, 11:24:07 PM »
St. Hripsime, please intercede for him!

Offline Gebre Menfes Kidus

  • "SERVANT of The HOLY SPIRIT"
  • Merarches
  • ***********
  • Posts: 8,972
  • "Lord Have Mercy on Me a Sinner!"
    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?ref=profile&id=1456515775
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #15 on: October 09, 2009, 07:50:56 AM »
Please don't give up. Maybe that's all you can do right now, is simply determine not to abandon life. Perhaps that is the most noble fight of all, that in times of utter despair, you simply cling to life. Perhaps this is all God requires of you. Just hang on.

"Learning to accept trials and sorrows is precisely the path to salvation. Suffering is God's visitation to us." -Father Seraphim Rose-

"Lord have mercy."


Selam

""Love is a dangerous thing. It will crush you if you trust it. But without it you can never be whole. Love crucifies, but love saves. We will either be saved together with love, or damned alone without it."    Selam, +GMK+

Offline mike

  • Stratopedarches
  • **************
  • Posts: 22,589
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #16 on: October 09, 2009, 07:54:22 AM »
Lord, have mercy!
Hyperdox Herman, Eastern Orthodox Christian News - fb, Eastern Orthodox Christian News - tt

not everything I typed before [insert current date] may reflect my current views on the subject

Offline Douglas

  • High Elder
  • ******
  • Posts: 608
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #17 on: October 09, 2009, 10:09:31 AM »
Lord, have mercy upon your servant. Increase his faith. Lay Thy hand of healing upon him that he might fully recover.
Douglas no longer posts on the forum.

Offline ialmisry

  • There's nothing John of Damascus can't answer
  • Hypatos
  • *****************
  • Posts: 39,286
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #18 on: October 09, 2009, 10:56:23 AM »
Lord have mercy!  May the fire be refining and not consuming.
Question a friend, perhaps he did not do it; but if he did anything so that he may do it no more.
A hasty quarrel kindles fire,
and urgent strife sheds blood.
If you blow on a spark, it will glow;
if you spit on it, it will be put out;
                           and both come out of your mouth

Offline stashko

  • Protokentarchos
  • *********
  • Posts: 4,998
  • Wonderworking Sitka Icon
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #19 on: October 09, 2009, 12:08:24 PM »
Prayers ! Lord Have Mercy  ! Amen Amen ,God Grant You Peace, Healing
In heart, mind ,body ,soul, and spirit...

In Faith we ask in Faith We Recieve...Amen

ГОСПОДЕ ГОСПОДЕ ,ПОГЛЕДАЈ СА НЕБА ,ДОЂИ И ПОСЕТИ ТВОЈ ВИНОГРАД ТВОЈА ДЕСНИЦА ПОСАДИЛА АМИН АМИН.

Offline scamandrius

  • Musicians don't dance
  • Taxiarches
  • **********
  • Posts: 6,956
  • Why do I waste my time here?
  • Faith: Greek Orthodox
  • Jurisdiction: DOWAMA of AANA
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #20 on: October 09, 2009, 02:50:36 PM »
Lord have mercy on you and keep you.

Also remember that the road we take with our Lord to Golgotha will always be paved with stumbling blocks.  Just make sure you keep getting up.

Through the prayers of our father among the saints, the Venerable St. John Damascene, may our Lord Jesus Christ have mercy upon you and save you.
Hey, I don't hand out 9.5s to just anyone!  ;D

Offline Catherine

  • Elder
  • *****
  • Posts: 453
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #21 on: October 10, 2009, 08:06:35 PM »
Dear St. George, there is some really good advice here...My thoughts and prayers are with you at this extremely difficult time. Lord, have mercy....

Offline PeterTheAleut

  • The Right Blowhard Peter the Furtive of Yetts O'Muckhart
  • Section Moderator
  • Hypatos
  • *****
  • Posts: 35,068
  • Lord, have mercy on the Christians in Mosul!
  • Faith: Orthodox Christian
  • Jurisdiction: Orthodox Church in America
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #22 on: October 10, 2009, 10:50:01 PM »
Off-topic post regarding exercises that are effective against back pain split off and moved to this Other Topics thread:  Exercises for Relieving Back Pain  Please remember that this is the Prayer Forum, which is reserved solely for prayer.  Posts devoted to giving medical and/or physical training advice need to be posted on another board or PMed to the intended recipient so that we can keep threads on the Prayer Forum focused on their sole purpose:  prayer.  Thank you.
« Last Edit: October 10, 2009, 10:51:04 PM by PeterTheAleut »
Not all who wander are lost.

Offline PeterTheAleut

  • The Right Blowhard Peter the Furtive of Yetts O'Muckhart
  • Section Moderator
  • Hypatos
  • *****
  • Posts: 35,068
  • Lord, have mercy on the Christians in Mosul!
  • Faith: Orthodox Christian
  • Jurisdiction: Orthodox Church in America
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #23 on: October 10, 2009, 11:02:38 PM »
Lord, have mercy!
Not all who wander are lost.

Offline Alveus Lacuna

  • Taxiarches
  • **********
  • Posts: 7,062
  • Faith: Orthodox
  • Jurisdiction: OCA
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #24 on: October 12, 2009, 12:19:58 AM »
Lord, have mercy!

Offline Ian Lazarus

  • The Main Man!
  • OC.net guru
  • *******
  • Posts: 1,545
  • yIjah, Qey' 'oH!
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #25 on: October 12, 2009, 02:04:00 AM »
Lord, have mercy.

Holy John the Baptist, interceed for us.

Amen
"For I am With thee, withersoever thou goest"

Joshua 1:9

Offline Fr. George

  • formerly "Cleveland"
  • Administrator
  • Stratopedarches
  • *******
  • Posts: 20,238
  • May the Lord bless you and keep you always!
  • Faith: Orthodox Christian
  • Jurisdiction: Greek Orthodox Metropolis of Pittsburgh
Re: In pain and extremely angry
« Reply #26 on: October 15, 2009, 12:21:22 AM »
Lord, have mercy.
"O Cross of Christ, all-holy, thrice-blessed, and life-giving, instrument of the mystical rites of Zion, the holy Altar for the service of our Great Archpriest, the blessing - the weapon - the strength of priests, our pride, our consolation, the light in our hearts, our mind, and our steps"
Met. Meletios of Nikopolis & Preveza, from his ordination.