OrthodoxChristianity.net
October 22, 2014, 10:37:33 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
News: Reminder: No political discussions in the public fora.  If you do not have access to the private Politics Forum, please send a PM to Fr. George.
 
   Home   Help Calendar Contact Treasury Tags Login Register  
Pages: « 1 2 3 4 »  All   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Question for Men  (Read 19938 times) Average Rating: 0
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« Reply #45 on: August 07, 2009, 09:12:16 PM »

I find many of them too plain and business/career-like fo my tastes

Yes, I agree - I just wanted to pick a number of women dressed differently (skirts, slacks, sweaters etc.), not selecting for special class or prettyness. In other words, I picked women who look good, not necessarily stunning.

A woman whom I consider to be very attractive and well-dressed is Carla Bruni-Sarkozy. Do you agree?

Yes!
« Last Edit: August 07, 2009, 09:12:38 PM by Heorhij » Logged

Love never fails.
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« Reply #46 on: August 07, 2009, 09:15:25 PM »

(By the way, Heorhij, did you spend all day looking at pictures?! Tongue  laugh )
LOL.  George, you've been caught. Shocked

NOOOO!!!! Five minutes. I'll tell you the secret: I just typed in the Google search window, "women dressed, images" - and selected photos very quickly, paying attention only to what I would call a "normally good" look, not something spectacular.

As for my day, alas, I spent all of it at a very boring assessment meeting.
Logged

Love never fails.
Myrrh23
OC.net guru
*******
Offline Offline

Posts: 1,639



« Reply #47 on: August 07, 2009, 09:23:32 PM »

 Now, if she can pull off a lab coat and goggles... RrrrrrRRRRRrrr, LOL!  laugh

Hey Nebelpfade, my college major is Clinical Laboratory Science. Meet me by the back work table in Chem Lab 201! Wink Cheesy angel
« Last Edit: August 07, 2009, 09:24:02 PM by Myrrh23 » Logged

*I am no longer posting on OC.net*

We all have a Black Dog and a White Dog inside of us. The One you feed the most eventually eats the Other.

All are tempted, but it is the courageous person who clings to God during the storm. For the Ego is a prison, but Christ is the Liberator
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« Reply #48 on: August 07, 2009, 09:27:24 PM »

 Now, if she can pull off a lab coat and goggles... RrrrrrRRRRRrrr, LOL!  laugh

Hey Nebelpfade, my college major is Clinical Laboratory Science. Meet me by the back work table in Chem Lab 201! Wink Cheesy angel

Lesya's colleague has this cartoon on her office door. A guy sits at the bar next to a beautiful woman, and says to her, "Listen, why don't you move your stool closer to mine, and let's sample this drink..." The woman answers, "You know... I am a medical parasitologist. To me, words "stool" and "sample" have, eh, different associations..."  Embarrassed
Logged

Love never fails.
Entscheidungsproblem
Formerly Friul & Nebelpfade
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Machine God
Posts: 4,495



WWW
« Reply #49 on: August 07, 2009, 09:43:08 PM »

Hey Nebelpfade, my college major is Clinical Laboratory Science. Meet me by the back work table in Chem Lab 201! Wink Cheesy angel

LOL!  Good to see more women in the sciences!  Some days I have to walk to the humanities area of campus to know your gender hasn't been whiped out by some XX-attacking super virus.
Logged

As a result of a thousand million years of evolution, the universe is becoming conscious of itself, able to understand something of its past history and its possible future.
-- Sir Julian Sorell Huxley FRS
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #50 on: August 07, 2009, 09:55:33 PM »

Hey Nebelpfade, my college major is Clinical Laboratory Science. Meet me by the back work table in Chem Lab 201! Wink Cheesy angel

LOL!  Good to see more women in the sciences!  Some days I have to walk to the humanities area of campus to know your gender hasn't been whiped out by some XX-attacking super virus.

Oooh. . I am a bit disappointed as I will not be needing the rather fetching outfit that I have been saving for a suitable wedding (all my matchmaking attempts have failed) but this, in fact, could be the beginning of something beautiful. .

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNC0kIzM1Fo
Logged
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #51 on: August 07, 2009, 09:59:13 PM »

  This sounds like a guilty conscience. .  laugh


NOOOO!!!! Five minutes. I spent all of it at a very boring assessment meeting.




Logged
Entscheidungsproblem
Formerly Friul & Nebelpfade
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Machine God
Posts: 4,495



WWW
« Reply #52 on: August 07, 2009, 10:15:37 PM »

Oooh. . I am a bit disappointed as I will not be needing the rather fetching outfit that I have been saving for a suitable wedding (all my matchmaking attempts have failed) but this, in fact, could be the beginning of something beautiful. .

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNC0kIzM1Fo


LOL!  There must be a law somewhere that if you have a female friend, you will be subject to matchmaking.  Tongue

Jests aside, I acually have a girl taking me to a movie next friday.  Which is a nice change of pace, and easier on my meagre wallet.  laugh
Logged

As a result of a thousand million years of evolution, the universe is becoming conscious of itself, able to understand something of its past history and its possible future.
-- Sir Julian Sorell Huxley FRS
jnorm888
Jnorm
Archon
********
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Antiochian
Posts: 2,516


Icon and Cross (international space station)


WWW
« Reply #53 on: August 08, 2009, 12:24:34 AM »

I'm wondering what your feelings are about women's clothing, hairstyles etc. Do you prefer high maintance women with french manicures, jimmy choo shoes, coach/prada handbags, expensive jewelry, expensive hairstyles etc. over a woman who doesn't have these things?

I was always taught in my childhood that these things are worldly and that inner beauty was more important. Also, without a huge income, it's very difficult to even afford constant trips to the hairdresser, much less all the expensive clothing and handbags etc.

But I recently went out with a man who just sent me a message informing me basically that I needed an expensive hairstyle and a makeover. I was rather insulted by this, as I simply do not have even a job at present. How can I afford to spend money on such things? I love beautiful, expensive clothing as much as anyone, but how to afford it?

Is this what is important to you men? Please discuss.


You are good the way you are. I like women who know how to live within their means. Women who are not frugil with money will always get into arguments with men, because they buy things they can't afford, and live above their means. This is one of the reasons why the divorce rate in America is extremely high.

Inner beauty is where it's at, and you have way much more than that. If a man doesn't like the way you are then that person is the wrong kind of man. You do not need a make over.......that man was the wrong person for you. You are extremely attractive.............you just need a non materialistic man that loves God. A man who is down to earth and level headed. A man that loves nature, and the things not of this world.

Keep your head up, guard your heart, and seek a man that loves God and believes in living within his means and you will do fine.









Jnorm888
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 12:27:18 AM by jnorm888 » Logged

"loving one's enemies does not mean loving wickedness, ungodliness, adultery, or theft. Rather, it means loving the theif, the ungodly, and the adulterer." Clement of Alexandria 195 A.D.

http://ancientchristiandefender.blogspot.com/
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #54 on: August 08, 2009, 12:26:19 AM »

Quote
Nebelpfade -There must be a law somewhere that if you have a female friend, you will be subject to matchmaking.

Confession: I love hosting dinner parties, etc (I love introducing people to one another. .). RE: matchmaking; I have tried and failed a couple of times, so my matchmaking days are over  Smiley.

Quote
I acually have a girl taking me to a movie next friday.


And why not. .Have a wonderful time, Nebelpfade.
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 12:27:13 AM by Catherine » Logged
Entscheidungsproblem
Formerly Friul & Nebelpfade
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Machine God
Posts: 4,495



WWW
« Reply #55 on: August 08, 2009, 12:34:05 AM »

Quote
Nebelpfade -There must be a law somewhere that if you have a female friend, you will be subject to matchmaking.

Confession: I love hosting dinner parties, etc (I love introducing people to one another. .). RE: matchmaking; I have tried and failed a couple of times, so my matchmaking days are over  Smiley.

From personally experience, I find that women do a terrible job matching their male friends up with potential matches.  laugh  Some seem to love matchmaking for the sake of matchmaking, without even thinking about the two people... Tongue

Quote
Quote
I acually have a girl taking me to a movie next friday.


And why not. .Have a wonderful time, Nebelpfade.

Thanks!  I'm hoping District 9 turns out better than Terminator Salvation did.  Grin
Logged

As a result of a thousand million years of evolution, the universe is becoming conscious of itself, able to understand something of its past history and its possible future.
-- Sir Julian Sorell Huxley FRS
Quinault
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Antiochian
Posts: 4,518


What about frogs? I like frogs!


« Reply #56 on: August 08, 2009, 12:36:24 AM »

I have had good luck matching anyone that isn't related to me Smiley
Logged
Entscheidungsproblem
Formerly Friul & Nebelpfade
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Machine God
Posts: 4,495



WWW
« Reply #57 on: August 08, 2009, 12:37:15 AM »

I have had good luck matching anyone that isn't related to me Smiley

Some have the gift, I guess.  Others should never try.  Tongue
Logged

As a result of a thousand million years of evolution, the universe is becoming conscious of itself, able to understand something of its past history and its possible future.
-- Sir Julian Sorell Huxley FRS
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #58 on: August 08, 2009, 12:48:16 AM »

I have had good luck matching anyone that isn't related to me Smiley

  Others should never try.  Tongue

  Tongue
Logged
Entscheidungsproblem
Formerly Friul & Nebelpfade
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Machine God
Posts: 4,495



WWW
« Reply #59 on: August 08, 2009, 12:59:45 AM »

  Tongue

LoL, good intentions at least.  Tongue
Logged

As a result of a thousand million years of evolution, the universe is becoming conscious of itself, able to understand something of its past history and its possible future.
-- Sir Julian Sorell Huxley FRS
prodromas
OC.net guru
*******
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Under the Green Pope
Posts: 1,239

Greek Orthodox


« Reply #60 on: August 08, 2009, 01:21:06 AM »

Dear Roseship,

Not that I can properly be classed as a man (i'm 19 Cheesy). But first of all I looked at your picture and I literally was taken aback you have a natural beauty that I don't see in many people that I have met, so purely on the physical factor you have nothing at all to worry about. Sometimes you have to remember that guys play games with woman and sadly saying supposedly nasty things works (like the other week a girl asked me what her dress looked like, and I said it looked like a curtain, interestingly enough she kept talking to me out of every guy that was there and she was way above my league). It could also be a lesser problem, he may just have been an idiot Cheesy

Although I haven't had as many experiences as everyone here, I have noticed that I am not only not attracted to woman with expensive clothes and the like, but that I have disdain and disgust at the vanity sometimes. The humble girl in the humble clothes always gets my attention.
Logged

The sins I don't commit are largely due to the weakness of my limbs.

1915-1923 Հայոց Ցեղասպանութիւն ,never again,
ܩܛܠܐ ܕܥܡܐ ܐܬܘܪܝܐ 1920-1914, never again,
השואה  1933-1945, never again,
(1914-1923) Ελληνική Γενοκτονία, never again
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #61 on: August 08, 2009, 01:50:42 AM »

And another thing. . Feminine, "pretty" clothing need not be expensive, Rosehip (designer labels and expensive clothes do not mean anything to me); you don't need lots of money to look very feminine, etc. Who wants to be part of the "in" crowd anyways? Do you have good, genuine friends - lots of support?
Logged
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #62 on: August 08, 2009, 01:51:29 AM »

  Tongue

LoL, good intentions at least.  Tongue

Yes. . Smiley
Logged
prodromas
OC.net guru
*******
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Under the Green Pope
Posts: 1,239

Greek Orthodox


« Reply #63 on: August 08, 2009, 01:53:07 AM »

Dear Roseship,

Not that I can properly be classed as a man (i'm 19 Cheesy). But first of all I looked at your picture and I literally was taken aback you have a natural beauty that I don't see in many people that I have met, so purely on the physical factor you have nothing at all to worry about. Sometimes you have to remember that guys play games with woman and sadly saying supposedly nasty things works (like the other week a girl asked me what her dress looked like, and I said it looked like a curtain, interestingly enough she kept talking to me out of every guy that was there and she was way above my league). It could also be a lesser problem, he may just have been an idiot Cheesy

Although I haven't had as many experiences as everyone here, I have noticed that I am not only not attracted to woman with expensive clothes and the like, but that I have disdain and disgust at the vanity sometimes. The humble girl in the humble clothes always gets my attention.
Logged

The sins I don't commit are largely due to the weakness of my limbs.

1915-1923 Հայոց Ցեղասպանութիւն ,never again,
ܩܛܠܐ ܕܥܡܐ ܐܬܘܪܝܐ 1920-1914, never again,
השואה  1933-1945, never again,
(1914-1923) Ελληνική Γενοκτονία, never again
prodromas
OC.net guru
*******
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Under the Green Pope
Posts: 1,239

Greek Orthodox


« Reply #64 on: August 08, 2009, 01:53:59 AM »

Double post whoops
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 01:58:26 AM by prodromas » Logged

The sins I don't commit are largely due to the weakness of my limbs.

1915-1923 Հայոց Ցեղասպանութիւն ,never again,
ܩܛܠܐ ܕܥܡܐ ܐܬܘܪܝܐ 1920-1914, never again,
השואה  1933-1945, never again,
(1914-1923) Ελληνική Γενοκτονία, never again
Gebre Menfes Kidus
"SERVANT of The HOLY SPIRIT"
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Ethiopian Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Orthodox Tewahedo / Non-Chalcedonian
Posts: 8,347

"Lord Have Mercy on Me a Sinner!"


WWW
« Reply #65 on: August 08, 2009, 02:46:03 AM »

Personally I find modesty more attractive than anything else. Whenever I see women that dress to get attention, then I immediatley perceive them to be insecure and weak. But whenever I see a woman who is dressed modestly and carries herself with quiet humility , then I perceive her to be strong and confident. And nothing is more attractive in a woman than serene strength and humble confidence.

That's my opinion, since you asked.


Selam

 
Logged

"Beauty is truth, and Orthodoxy is beautiful." +GMK+
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #66 on: August 08, 2009, 03:24:12 AM »

Personally I find modesty more attractive than anything else. Whenever I see women that dress to get attention,

Selam

 

Out of interest, how do you (guys) know they are dressing to get your attention?  Smiley Some women do dress to draw attention. ., but some women are still little girls inside and little girls love to dress up *cough. .like me  Smiley*  (if I were in a relationship, or married, I would dress to please my husband). On a serious note, how do guys tell the difference between an attention-seeking woman and a women who merely dresses for herself?
Logged
Entscheidungsproblem
Formerly Friul & Nebelpfade
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Machine God
Posts: 4,495



WWW
« Reply #67 on: August 08, 2009, 03:33:28 AM »

Out of interest, how do you (guys) know they are dressing to get your attention?  Smiley Some women do dress to draw attention. ., but some women are still little girls inside and little girls love to dress up *cough. .like me  Smiley*  (if I were in a relationship, or married, I would dress to please my husband). On a serious note, how do guys tell the difference between an attention-seeking woman and a women who merely dresses for herself?

Body language.  Not to say a woman who dresses for herself rather than for attention is cold or aloof, but they present themselves differently.
Logged

As a result of a thousand million years of evolution, the universe is becoming conscious of itself, able to understand something of its past history and its possible future.
-- Sir Julian Sorell Huxley FRS
Riddikulus
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Posts: 4,788



« Reply #68 on: August 08, 2009, 03:36:55 AM »

And why should anyone be judged by how they dress? Isn't this thread about that very point; being judged negatively, and negative critical comments? What makes a well-dressed woman weak and insecure? I have a friend who always looks gorgeous; I have never thought of her as weak and insecure. She loves to dress up whereas I can't be bothered. Just different strokes for different folks. And would a well-dressed man be seen as seeking attention and weak and insecure? If so, why should he? Can't people simply please themselves on how they attire themselves without people judging them as this or that?

Rosehip, you are lovely.
Logged

I believe in One God, maker of heaven and earth and of all things visible and invisible.

Nothing in biology makes sense except in the light of evolution.
Theodosius Dobzhansky, Russian Orthodox Christian (1900-1975)
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #69 on: August 08, 2009, 03:43:24 AM »

And why should anyone be judged by how they dress? Isn't this thread about that very point; being judged negatively, and negative critical comments? What makes a well-dressed woman weak and insecure? I have a friend who always looks gorgeous; I have never thought of her as weak and insecure. She loves to dress up whereas I can't be bothered. Just different strokes for different folks. And would a well-dressed man be seen as seeking attention and weak and insecure? If so, why should he? Can't people simply please themselves on how they attire themselves without people judging them as this or that?

Rosehip, you are lovely.

I completely agree. .
Logged
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #70 on: August 08, 2009, 03:44:41 AM »

Out of interest, how do you (guys) know they are dressing to get your attention?  Smiley Some women do dress to draw attention. ., but some women are still little girls inside and little girls love to dress up *cough. .like me  Smiley*  (if I were in a relationship, or married, I would dress to please my husband). On a serious note, how do guys tell the difference between an attention-seeking woman and a women who merely dresses for herself?

Body language.  Not to say a woman who dresses for herself rather than for attention is cold or aloof, but they present themselves differently.

Fairy nuff (Re: body language; point taken).
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 03:45:14 AM by Catherine » Logged
Gebre Menfes Kidus
"SERVANT of The HOLY SPIRIT"
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Ethiopian Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Orthodox Tewahedo / Non-Chalcedonian
Posts: 8,347

"Lord Have Mercy on Me a Sinner!"


WWW
« Reply #71 on: August 08, 2009, 04:17:21 AM »

And why should anyone be judged by how they dress? Isn't this thread about that very point; being judged negatively, and negative critical comments? What makes a well-dressed woman weak and insecure? I have a friend who always looks gorgeous; I have never thought of her as weak and insecure. She loves to dress up whereas I can't be bothered. Just different strokes for different folks. And would a well-dressed man be seen as seeking attention and weak and insecure? If so, why should he? Can't people simply please themselves on how they attire themselves without people judging them as this or that?

Rosehip, you are lovely.

Why are you confusing "well-dressed" with a lack of modesty? I was clear in stating that I prefer modesty in a woman. To me well-dressed means modest attire, not immodest. That's my opinion, which was the inquiring solicitation of the original post of this thread.

Now in regards to Catherine's question:
Of course no one can know what is in the heart or mind of a woman who dresses provocatively. But if a woman is desiring to honor God and honor men, then they will dress modestly so as not to encourage lustful thoughts. Perhaps a woman who is immature in her faith will not be aware of the consequences of her attire, and so in naivete she may continue to dress provocatively. But I doubt if any woman is really so naive as to not know that dressing provacatively brings undue attention to herself.

I also agree that body language and verbal language are good indicators of a woman's intention.

As far as being judgmental...  We all make judgments about people based upon their attire. It is disingenuous for anyone to claim that they don't. I for one do not apologize for making a prima facie assessment of a woman's character based upon her dress and her discourse. A provocatively clad woman may catch my eye; but a modest woman intrigues me intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. And my gorgeous wife has intrigued me for 13 years, much to the chagrin of these Babylon trollops who can't understand why I won't chase after them!

   

Selam
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 04:21:03 AM by Gebre Menfes Kidus » Logged

"Beauty is truth, and Orthodoxy is beautiful." +GMK+
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #72 on: August 08, 2009, 05:07:57 AM »

much to the chagrin of these Babylon trollops who can't understand why I won't chase after them!


Well, at least some women find you attractive.  Grin

I must say, I hate the word "trollop", Gebre Menfes Kidus, it is very judgmental and is only used to highlight the sins of others rather than our own sins. I live in a society in which my skirts and dresses are up to my knees (well, some of my dresses and skirts are up to my knees), I wear nice (sometimes tight "ish") tops, blouses, etc (that accentuate the female form). I do not dress a certain way to tempt you (men) or to try please you (not that I could or would want to anyway). "Tempting men" is certainly not on my mind. RE: lustful thoughts; I am an adult and therefore it is up to me to control myself. Lustful thoughts have been around for a very, very long time (regardless of how people dress).

Catherine
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 05:25:28 AM by Catherine » Logged
stanley123
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Catholic
Jurisdiction: Roman Catholic
Posts: 3,809


« Reply #73 on: August 08, 2009, 05:12:42 AM »

I'm wondering what your feelings are about women's clothing, hairstyles etc. Do you prefer high maintance women with french manicures, jimmy choo shoes, coach/prada handbags, expensive jewelry, expensive hairstyles etc. over a woman who doesn't have these things?

I was always taught in my childhood that these things are worldly and that inner beauty was more important. Also, without a huge income, it's very difficult to even afford constant trips to the hairdresser, much less all the expensive clothing and handbags etc.

But I recently went out with a man who just sent me a message informing me basically that I needed an expensive hairstyle and a makeover. I was rather insulted by this, as I simply do not have even a job at present. How can I afford to spend money on such things? I love beautiful, expensive clothing as much as anyone, but how to afford it?

Is this what is important to you men? Please discuss.
Inner beauty is important to me.  I don't know why some women hang around men who are creeps.
Logged
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« Reply #74 on: August 08, 2009, 07:12:14 AM »

Personally I find modesty more attractive than anything else. Whenever I see women that dress to get attention,

Selam

 

Out of interest, how do you (guys) know they are dressing to get your attention?  Smiley Some women do dress to draw attention. ., but some women are still little girls inside and little girls love to dress up *cough. .like me  Smiley*  (if I were in a relationship, or married, I would dress to please my husband). On a serious note, how do guys tell the difference between an attention-seeking woman and a women who merely dresses for herself?

Actually, I do not think that if a woman dresses to get attention, it means that she is necessarily insecure. It may be "in the eyes of a beholder." My wife sometimes dresses to get attention, but she is very secure, and I think it's those men (or women), who pay too much attention to her when she is dressed to get attention, who are insecure.
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 07:14:07 AM by Heorhij » Logged

Love never fails.
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« Reply #75 on: August 08, 2009, 07:17:17 AM »

Lustful thoughts have been around for a very, very long time (regardless of how people dress).

But of course. And some men get a kick out of women who are dressed like nuns. It's described in the literature...
Logged

Love never fails.
mike
Stratopedarches
**************
Offline Offline

Posts: 21,467


WWW
« Reply #76 on: August 08, 2009, 07:19:15 AM »

LOL!  There must be a law somewhere that if you have a female friend, you will be subject to matchmaking.  Tongue


I've recently became a victim of my three friends doing such things on me. Quite an embarrassing situation.
Logged

Byzantinism
no longer posting here
Riddikulus
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Posts: 4,788



« Reply #77 on: August 08, 2009, 09:57:13 AM »

And why should anyone be judged by how they dress? Isn't this thread about that very point; being judged negatively, and negative critical comments? What makes a well-dressed woman weak and insecure? I have a friend who always looks gorgeous; I have never thought of her as weak and insecure. She loves to dress up whereas I can't be bothered. Just different strokes for different folks. And would a well-dressed man be seen as seeking attention and weak and insecure? If so, why should he? Can't people simply please themselves on how they attire themselves without people judging them as this or that?

Rosehip, you are lovely.

Why are you confusing "well-dressed" with a lack of modesty? I was clear in stating that I prefer modesty in a woman. To me well-dressed means modest attire, not immodest. That's my opinion, which was the inquiring solicitation of the original post of this thread.

Now in regards to Catherine's question:
Of course no one can know what is in the heart or mind of a woman who dresses provocatively. But if a woman is desiring to honor God and honor men, then they will dress modestly so as not to encourage lustful thoughts. Perhaps a woman who is immature in her faith will not be aware of the consequences of her attire, and so in naivete she may continue to dress provocatively. But I doubt if any woman is really so naive as to not know that dressing provacatively brings undue attention to herself.

I also agree that body language and verbal language are good indicators of a woman's intention.

As far as being judgmental...  We all make judgments about people based upon their attire. It is disingenuous for anyone to claim that they don't. I for one do not apologize for making a prima facie assessment of a woman's character based upon her dress and her discourse. A provocatively clad woman may catch my eye; but a modest woman intrigues me intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. And my gorgeous wife has intrigued me for 13 years, much to the chagrin of these Babylon trollops who can't understand why I won't chase after them!
 
Selam

Babylon trollops!!??   Roll Eyes
Logged

I believe in One God, maker of heaven and earth and of all things visible and invisible.

Nothing in biology makes sense except in the light of evolution.
Theodosius Dobzhansky, Russian Orthodox Christian (1900-1975)
Gebre Menfes Kidus
"SERVANT of The HOLY SPIRIT"
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Ethiopian Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Orthodox Tewahedo / Non-Chalcedonian
Posts: 8,347

"Lord Have Mercy on Me a Sinner!"


WWW
« Reply #78 on: August 08, 2009, 11:26:49 AM »

Dear Catherine and Riddikulus (and everyone else):

Please forgive my judgmental term "Babylon trollops." You are correct that this is not very Christian language, and I humbly accept the reprimand. Sometimes my fire spirit and poetic tongue get in the way of Christian charity. Thanks for pointing this out, and I'll try to do better in the future. Our Lord loves these "trollops," and thus I should love them too. (But in a much different way than I used to.)Embarrassed

Selam
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 11:27:24 AM by Gebre Menfes Kidus » Logged

"Beauty is truth, and Orthodoxy is beautiful." +GMK+
88Devin12
Warned
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox Christian
Jurisdiction: OCA
Posts: 4,926



« Reply #79 on: August 08, 2009, 12:41:54 PM »

I guess I'll put my 2 cents in.

I don't think all guys are soley interested in physical attractiveness. To me, it isn't important as long as the person is taking care of themselves and trying to be healthy. Living with a bunch of guys in college has taught me that not all guys are soley focused on the physical aspects. The guys I live with are definitely constantly talking about who is "hot" and various other subjects innapropriate for this forum. But when it comes down to it, while they think they want someone that (according to our society) is physically stunning, they in fact look for other aspects first.

One of my best friends at college is dating our old RA (now graduated), she's very pretty, but our society may not put her up with the celebrities that many men gawk at. My other friend dated another friend of ours who is also pretty, but also probably wouldn't be considered in the same class as the celebrities. Not all guys are focused on the physical attractiveness.

Physical attractiveness isn't important. In my opinion, as long as the person cares about their appearance (that is, as far as hygiene, not makeup wise) and makes efforts to make sure they are physically healthy, as well as spiritually, then that shows more positive aspects of their personality.

I hope that makes sense. You don't have to be physically stunning or attractive. Just be yourself, don't worry about your physical aspects, just try to be healthy and hygienic.

One of my favorite Rock songs is by Evanescence (lead singer is Amy Lee), it's called "Everybody's Fool" and she wrote it about how we idolize & worship the models, socialites and celebrities, yet once they are no longer physically attractive, we throw them away. It appears she may have wrote it during Britney Spears' collapse & self-destruction.

The way our society views women is horrible, destructive and sinful. Many men recognize this and resist it. If someone doesn't like you for who you are physically, it's his problem, it isn't yours. You are created in God's image, don't worry about trying to improve parts of you that our society says are important/sexy.

I hope I helped and made sense! Smiley
Logged
Rosehip
Archon
********
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Posts: 2,760



« Reply #80 on: August 08, 2009, 01:14:19 PM »

This is what is so extremely troubling and hurtful for me. I put hours of thought and time into dressing attractively and with femininity. I have extremely high standards for myself physically-not only physically, but also spiritually and chastity-wise. I love beauty and strive constantly for that. But all the same, the constant rude remarks, rejections and failures. I now have a checklist of cruel remarks that will be made and hold my breath, wondering which one it will be this time around...And this year, there have even been so-called godly, spiritually-minded Orthodox men who have completely led me on and stood me up.
Logged

+ Our dear sister Martha (Rosehip) passed away on Dec 20, 2010.  May her memory be eternal! +
jnorm888
Jnorm
Archon
********
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Antiochian
Posts: 2,516


Icon and Cross (international space station)


WWW
« Reply #81 on: August 08, 2009, 01:24:19 PM »

This is what is so extremely troubling and hurtful for me. I put hours of thought and time into dressing attractively and with femininity. I have extremely high standards for myself physically-not only physically, but also spiritually and chastity-wise. I love beauty and strive constantly for that. But all the same, the constant rude remarks, rejections and failures. I now have a checklist of cruel remarks that will be made and hold my breath, wondering which one it will be this time around...And this year, there have even been so-called godly, spiritually-minded Orthodox men who have completely led me on and stood me up.

I'm sorry to hear that. I wouldn't keep that list..........throw it away.
Logged

"loving one's enemies does not mean loving wickedness, ungodliness, adultery, or theft. Rather, it means loving the theif, the ungodly, and the adulterer." Clement of Alexandria 195 A.D.

http://ancientchristiandefender.blogspot.com/
88Devin12
Warned
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox Christian
Jurisdiction: OCA
Posts: 4,926



« Reply #82 on: August 08, 2009, 01:27:29 PM »

This is what is so extremely troubling and hurtful for me. I put hours of thought and time into dressing attractively and with femininity. I have extremely high standards for myself physically-not only physically, but also spiritually and chastity-wise. I love beauty and strive constantly for that. But all the same, the constant rude remarks, rejections and failures. I now have a checklist of cruel remarks that will be made and hold my breath, wondering which one it will be this time around...And this year, there have even been so-called godly, spiritually-minded Orthodox men who have completely led me on and stood me up.
Lord have mercy,
I agree with jnorm888, throw the list away.

Are these men that are making these comments or men and women? It's really hard to be insulted by peers, especially if you are already beaten down. Have you spoken to your Priest or Spiritual Father about these things?
Logged
Tamara
Archon
********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox Christian
Jurisdiction: Antiochian Orthodox Diocese of America
Posts: 2,208


+Pray for Orthodox Unity+


« Reply #83 on: August 08, 2009, 01:40:28 PM »

This is what is so extremely troubling and hurtful for me. I put hours of thought and time into dressing attractively and with femininity. I have extremely high standards for myself physically-not only physically, but also spiritually and chastity-wise. I love beauty and strive constantly for that. But all the same, the constant rude remarks, rejections and failures. I now have a checklist of cruel remarks that will be made and hold my breath, wondering which one it will be this time around...And this year, there have even been so-called godly, spiritually-minded Orthodox men who have completely led me on and stood me up.

Dear Rosehip,

You are very beautiful, inside and out. Ignore the men who have disappointed you. And just because someone is raised Orthodox, it doesn't mean they know how to treat women respectfully or lovingly. I found that out when I was dating Orthodox men. In fact, some Orthodox cultures, unfortunately, look down on woman and treat them like second class citizens. Keep that in mind when you date. Perhaps you may want to date men who are new to the church and come from cultures which have a history of chivalry.

Many on this list have given you really great advice. Be confident in who you are. You know what you believe in and you know what you are looking for in a man. Expect the man you date to treat you respectfully and courteously.
Dress to please yourself. When you dress the way that makes you feel good about yourself and in a way that pleases you, it lets the men know out there you are a confident woman. Strength of character will help you attract the right kind of man and will keep the losers away from you.

love, Tamara  Kiss
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 01:42:14 PM by Tamara » Logged
jnorm888
Jnorm
Archon
********
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Antiochian
Posts: 2,516


Icon and Cross (international space station)


WWW
« Reply #84 on: August 08, 2009, 01:51:46 PM »

This is what is so extremely troubling and hurtful for me. I put hours of thought and time into dressing attractively and with femininity. I have extremely high standards for myself physically-not only physically, but also spiritually and chastity-wise. I love beauty and strive constantly for that. But all the same, the constant rude remarks, rejections and failures. I now have a checklist of cruel remarks that will be made and hold my breath, wondering which one it will be this time around...And this year, there have even been so-called godly, spiritually-minded Orthodox men who have completely led me on and stood me up.
Lord have mercy,
I agree with jnorm888, throw the list away.

Are these men that are making these comments or men and women? It's really hard to be insulted by peers, especially if you are already beaten down. Have you spoken to your Priest or Spiritual Father about these things?

There must be something wrong with the men in Canada for Rosehip is extremely attractive. I really don't understand...........I really don't.

It must be a Canadian thing or something.







Jnorm888
Logged

"loving one's enemies does not mean loving wickedness, ungodliness, adultery, or theft. Rather, it means loving the theif, the ungodly, and the adulterer." Clement of Alexandria 195 A.D.

http://ancientchristiandefender.blogspot.com/
Marat
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Faith: Catholic reinvestigating the Orthodox Church
Posts: 383


« Reply #85 on: August 08, 2009, 01:52:27 PM »

Roseship

I haven't seen a pic of you like others on here but I don't need to. (Although I'm always curious as to what posters on here look like) I hate to see you going through this and what a toll it seems to be taking on you. My sister is back in the dating scene after years out of it. She has meet a number of guys though online dating sites. I hear her tales and the feelings she experiences are not unlike what you have described. I think there is a good reason these guys are still single. No woman in her right mind would put up with them. Guys who are hung up on exes or who say cruel things... you are too wonderful to waste your time on them. Please don't take what they say and do to heart. I agree, get rid of the list. It isn't healthy for you to dwell on those things.
Logged
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #86 on: August 08, 2009, 01:57:01 PM »

People only hurt you because you let them, Rosehip; it's time to put a stop to it, sister, as I say, you are worth much more than this. Give, love, share, if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out - who gives a monkey's. . anyway? - but make sure you have plenty of fun along the way . Whatever you do don't panic as in such situations one is likely to just accept any situation (it is indeed easier to push people away instead of risking a new relationship or give up completely). It is all in God's hands and I know He'll continue to bring you His peace. Stay close to your friends and Spiritual Father.
« Last Edit: August 08, 2009, 01:57:48 PM by Catherine » Logged
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #87 on: August 08, 2009, 01:59:50 PM »

Dear Catherine and Riddikulus (and everyone else):

Please forgive my judgmental term "Babylon trollops." You are correct that this is not very Christian language, and I humbly accept the reprimand. Sometimes my fire spirit and poetic tongue get in the way of Christian charity. Thanks for pointing this out, and I'll try to do better in the future. Our Lord loves these "trollops," and thus I should love them too. (But in a much different way than I used to.)Embarrassed

Selam

No worries - we all slip up at times (me more than most. .)

God Bless, GMK.
 
Logged
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #88 on: August 08, 2009, 02:02:16 PM »

Personally I find modesty more attractive than anything else. Whenever I see women that dress to get attention,

Selam

 

Out of interest, how do you (guys) know they are dressing to get your attention?  Smiley Some women do dress to draw attention. ., but some women are still little girls inside and little girls love to dress up *cough. .like me  Smiley*  (if I were in a relationship, or married, I would dress to please my husband). On a serious note, how do guys tell the difference between an attention-seeking woman and a women who merely dresses for herself?

Actually, I do not think that if a woman dresses to get attention, it means that she is necessarily insecure. It may be "in the eyes of a beholder." My wife sometimes dresses to get attention, but she is very secure, and I think it's those men (or women), who pay too much attention to her when she is dressed to get attention, who are insecure.

You sound like the perfect non-contolling husband, Heorhij. Some men would mind if their wives were dressing to attract attention. However, I am curious. . Do you not want her to dress solely for your attention?   Wink
Logged
Catherine
Elder
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 453


« Reply #89 on: August 08, 2009, 02:07:52 PM »

LOL!  There must be a law somewhere that if you have a female friend, you will be subject to matchmaking.  Tongue


I've recently became a victim of my three friends doing such things on me. Quite an embarrassing situation.

Mike, the golden rule of matchmaking is make sure that both parties are happy to take part. I hope things work out for you. . :-s

Logged
Tags:
Pages: « 1 2 3 4 »  All   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.18 | SMF © 2013, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
Page created in 0.147 seconds with 71 queries.