I was raised Roman Catholic, and was chrismated on Holy Saturdy in 1984 in a large, pan-ethnic Antiochian parish in the city of my birth, Louisville, KY. I now live in Central Pennsylvania, and there are 61 Orthodox parishes within a 60-mile radius of where I live, including the national Carpatho-Russian Cathedral. I go to the local parish here in town, a small OCA parish. In the intervening period when I returned to Indiana for my PhD, there was only a tiny ROCOR mission there.
I am sympathetic to the concerns raised by the original poster and several others, but I merely want to point out how very different they are from my own experience. The Antiochian parish into which I was chrismated had begun as a very ethnic parish. By the time I got there, the parish was probably no more than 50% Arab, and the rest everything else (Greeks, Slavs, several families from India, and many converts). It was, and still is, a thriving parish. At the time, the chanter was still alive, and he chanted Orthros and Vespers (in Syrian chant, which many here on another thread are calling Byzantine), but the choir sang at Divine Liturgy (I was in the choir). We sang the same 8-tone polyphonic chants they do here at the OCA church. The services were all English.
My parish here is also pan-ethnic, though mostly Carpatho-Russian in background, reflecting the demographics of this part of Pennsylvania. It began as the OCA campus mission (it's a college town), and locals started coming here, rather than drive over the mountains to any one of the other available churches. More came, not all of them even Slavic, much less Carpatho-Russian, they bought a small Methodist church, and the rest is history. The parish here is also completely English.
Other than the rather irritating differences in English translation (just enough to trip you up), these two parishes are very similar. They are both in a very real sense American parishes. Each is an ecclesiastical family where ethnic background is never a barrier. In Louisville after Liturgy, you could get raw kibbeh, fried chicken, and curry. Ethnicity was by no means purged, but nobody there insisted that his ethnicity override all else. We were all Orthodox, and we were all Americans. The same is true here. The priest is from Texas and has a drawl you can cut with a knife. Etc.
The only church where I ran into the wall of ethnicity on steroids was the ROCOR mission in Indiana -- and every single one of them was an American convert. Fake accents, 19th century peasant garb, weekly lectures on how we weren't Orthodox unless we supported an absolute monarchy in the United States, and it was a convert church.
I'm not slinging mud at converts. I am one. My point is that it's not necessarily the immigrants or their children or grandchildren who are insisting on liturgical languages nobody can understand, or an ethnic focus to the point of literal anti-Americanism. Since moving to Pennsylvania, I have seen none of that, and my theory is that it's the demographics. There are so many Slavs here, both Orthodox and Byzantine, that they have no need to carry a chip on their shoulders. They're as American as the Germans in the Ohio River Valley where I was raised.
I'm a linguist. I love languages. But I reject utterly the idea that we should learn a foreign language to adapt to immigrants, be it Spanish, or a liturgical language in an Orthodox church, and for exactly the same reason (I somehow doubt that if a bunch of Lutherans set up a mission in Russia, then held English services and made up reasons to demand that the local populace learn English to accommodate them, that it would work very well, in fact, I suspect the Russians would be screaming bloody murder; that we tolerate it at all in the United States is a testament itself). If the parish here weren't English, I'd drive to one that was.
There will be no American Orthodox church until we Orthodox accept that fact that we are in America, and we do not have any special license here and have to follow the same rules as everyone else. The Catholics realized it. We can, too.