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Author Topic: Staying Faithful and Having Faith  (Read 1168 times) Average Rating: 0
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Struggle4Orthodoxy
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« on: October 10, 2008, 06:12:49 AM »

I am Orthodox, at least I try to be. I was baptized 6 years ago into Holy Orthodoxy, but ever since i've been in the military I havn't lost faith, I still believe it just seems i choose to ignore. I recently got out of the military and have been trying to get my life on track and it seems every time I think some thing good is going for me God just rips it right out from under me... I have blamed him for so much now I just don't know how to think he is helping me any more... I feel like im doing every thing all on my own with out his help or guidence.
How do you guys deal with this?

In Christ
Nektarios
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Thomas
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« Reply #1 on: October 10, 2008, 08:38:40 AM »

Nekatarios,

I was in the military for 20 years and like you converted to the Church while I was in the military.  Feel free to PM me if you need to talk about transition from military life to civilian life. One of the most important things for us was to find a church and continue to be active in the Church. Jobs were hard to find and I actually had to settle for one  50 miles from the closest church.  I have have had  great growth and struggle in my time after the military but have found my parish family the greatest support for me.

Thomas
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« Reply #2 on: October 10, 2008, 08:15:10 PM »

I was going through a lack of faith last week because of life circumstances.  Then a good friend scolded me and helped me get back on track.  Smiley  Now things have improved.
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GabrieltheCelt
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« Reply #3 on: October 10, 2008, 11:21:37 PM »

Hi Nektarios,

 First, God bless you for your service to our country!  Second, Welcome to the forum! Smiley

I hope you'll take Thomas up on his offer, but in the meantime maybe you'll want to speak to your priest about these issues?  Many of us at one time or another have blamed God for any number of things.  And while He's big enough to understand our weaknesess, blaming Him doesn't ever seem to make things any better.   I used to blame Him for so many things that I ended up becoming an athiest for a while. Shocked  Maybe you've thought about that too.  It's certainly tempting when it seems nothing is going the way we hope or want.  But the thing is, sometimes what we think we need turns out to be dangerous in the long run.  Maybe God is guiding you in a direction you haven't considered?  Maybe He's letting you fall because you're relying on yourself too much? 

Forgive me if I scandalized you.

In Christ,
Gabriel
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Struggle4Orthodoxy
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« Reply #4 on: October 10, 2008, 11:38:34 PM »

I dont know what he wants me to do. I started the Police Academy but had to drop out... I just got out the military now I am thinking about going back in, but because I was in the Infantry I am risking going back to iraq and leaving my family and my significant other behind for a while.. I dont know what he wants.
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« Reply #5 on: October 11, 2008, 12:18:14 AM »

I dont know what he wants me to do. I started the Police Academy but had to drop out... I just got out the military now I am thinking about going back in, but because I was in the Infantry I am risking going back to iraq and leaving my family and my significant other behind for a while.. I dont know what he wants.

Have you asked Him?

You mentioned a significant other and family, so not everything has been pulled out from under you.  I haven't been so lucky: I've been in "family court" for over 7 years, and spent three weeks in Cook County Jail this summer of contempt of a court that is beneath contempt (it was interesting in that during my stay the Federal Authorities served the county about impeding legal action over the jail conditions: I got to see the scrample immediately after the Attorney General's letter was served. It was also interesting the awe the inmates held me for being a teacher.  I 've never in 10 years seen such respect for the teaching profession).  But I don't want to whine: I only bring it up in that while there I went on a hunger strike, never eating the three weeks there (though by the looks of it, many of the meals didn't make this too big a sacrifice  Tongue).  Much to my surprise, and the other inmates astonishment and disbelief, I honestly never felt hungry (I did drink, btw).  I took it as a sign that I was to stick to my guns.  It helped (actually, it was one of the things that made me confront the judge: I was out of the country with my children a week before, and could have relatively easily not come back) that my 11 year old, for his standardized test essay in school wrote an essay on his role model, as it turns out me, in which he talked about his father never giving up his perserverance to make all things right, which is the reason why he has to go to court so often (mom has dragged them to court, to the lawyers, etc.).

So you are not alone in thinking you are alone: did not Elijah complain of the same thing when he fled after defeating the prophets of Baal ?  You don't want to drink your cup?  Christ didn't either, but had to.  So you might be going through a period of carrying your cross, but that doesn't mean you have to like it (that itself is a grace).

It might be trite, but I would suggest reading the Psalms (though consult your priest/spiritual advisor).  There is many dark clouds covering the silver lining of those verses.

Oh, and I would take Thomas up on the PM offer.  You could PM too, but I know nothing of the military. Shocked
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A hasty quarrel kindles fire,
and urgent strife sheds blood.
If you blow on a spark, it will glow;
if you spit on it, it will be put out;
                           and both come out of your mouth
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