OrthodoxChristianity.net
November 29, 2014, 03:59:05 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
News: Reminder: No political discussions in the public fora.  If you do not have access to the private Politics Forum, please send a PM to Fr. George.
 
   Home   Help Calendar Contact Treasury Tags Login Register  
Pages: 1   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: (HUMOR!) A typical Russian-Ukrainian misunderstanding  (Read 3143 times) Average Rating: 0
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« on: October 09, 2008, 10:27:23 AM »

From a Russian humorist listserv. Smiley

Российско-украинская граница. На пограничном посту русский и украинский пограничники .

Украинский
погранец :"Оцe, дивлюся я на вашу кацапську заставу, ну як були ви,
кацапи, замазyри, так и зосталися. Напльовано, нахаркано, усe загадженe и
зас**нe. Нe тe шо ось, у менe. И прибрано, и чистeнько, i
сонeчко над нами сильнiше свiтить i грiє ."

Российский
погранец :"Все это х**ня. Зато мы народ радушный, добрый - не то шо вы.
Он у нас на границе над дорогой транспарант - "ДОБРО ПОЖАЛОВАТЬ !!!" А
у вас, транспарант, и шо написано Huh

- (читает вслух ) - "НЕХ*Й ШАСТАТЬ ".
Украинский погранец выбегает из будки, смотрит на свой транспарант, читает... со смеху отвечает :

"От жeж ти... нeграмотнe, там же на нашiй рiднiй, солов'їний мовi написано - "НЕХАЙ ЩАСТИТЬ !!!"(перевод. (ВСЕГО ДОБРОГО)
« Last Edit: October 09, 2008, 10:43:20 AM by Heorhij » Logged

Love never fails.
LizaSymonenko
Слава Ісусу Христу!!! Glory to Jesus Christ!!!
Global Moderator
Toumarches
******
Offline Offline

Faith: God's Holy Catholic and Apostolic Orthodox Church
Jurisdiction: Ukrainian Orthodox Church of the U.S.A.
Posts: 13,485



WWW
« Reply #1 on: October 09, 2008, 10:49:10 AM »

 Cheesy
Logged

Conquer evil men by your gentle kindness, and make zealous men wonder at your goodness. Put the lover of legality to shame by your compassion. With the afflicted be afflicted in mind. Love all men, but keep distant from all men.
—St. Isaac of Syria
prodromas
OC.net guru
*******
Offline Offline

Faith: Eastern Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Under the Green Pope
Posts: 1,239

Greek Orthodox


« Reply #2 on: October 10, 2008, 12:48:05 AM »

LOL ethnic stereotypes.
Logged

The sins I don't commit are largely due to the weakness of my limbs.

1915-1923 Հայոց Ցեղասպանութիւն ,never again,
ܩܛܠܐ ܕܥܡܐ ܐܬܘܪܝܐ 1920-1914, never again,
השואה  1933-1945, never again,
(1914-1923) Ελληνική Γενοκτονία, never again
msmirnov
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Bulgarian Orthodox Church
Posts: 151


« Reply #3 on: October 10, 2008, 01:49:36 AM »

 Grin
Logged
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« Reply #4 on: October 10, 2008, 02:18:38 PM »

LOL ethnic stereotypes.

And linguistic subtleties. The sign on the Ukrainian side of the border that the Russian border patrol agent read, may mean, depending on the pronounciation of vowels and of the consonants "sh/shch," either "we don't want you here" (in an extremely rude, obscene form), or "welcome."  Grin Grin Grin

This is, of course, a joke, but in real life, the wrong pronounciation of vowels in Slavic languages can distort a message so badly that it becomes a subject of total ridicule. Alyaksander Lukashenka, the President of Belarus, became famous overnight when he, in a Russian-language radio program, said, "я постоянно перетряхиваю свой аппарат и знаю, кто врет, а кто не врет." It means, "I am constantly checking (or "auditing") my staff and I know who lies, and who does not lie." Yet, because of his heavy Belarussian accent, this sentence sounded like, "я постоянно перетрахиваю свой аппарат и знаю, кто врот, а кто не врот," i.e., "I always have sex with each member of my staff and I know who is into oral sex and who is not."  Roll Eyes Roll Eyes Roll Eyes
« Last Edit: October 10, 2008, 02:27:23 PM by Heorhij » Logged

Love never fails.
mike
Warned
Stratopedarches
**************
Offline Offline

Posts: 21,477


« Reply #5 on: October 10, 2008, 04:31:20 PM »

There is one funny Belarurian-Russian joke like this one.

Belarusian imigrant from the USA comes back to motherland. He/she stayed in a hotel and is asking the receptionist about the breakfast:
-Добры дзень, ці будзе снеданне?
Russian-speaking receptionist in Minsk's hotel cannot understand him/her:
-Снеданне?
-Каб рана паесці?
-А! Завтрак, будзе.
-Заўтра?? A сёння Sad

Russian завтрак (breakfast) sounds almost the same as Belarusian заўтра (tomorrow).
Logged
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« Reply #6 on: October 10, 2008, 05:38:34 PM »

There is one funny Belarurian-Russian joke like this one.

Belarusian imigrant from the USA comes back to motherland. He/she stayed in a hotel and is asking the receptionist about the breakfast:
-Добры дзень, ці будзе снеданне?
Russian-speaking receptionist in Minsk's hotel cannot understand him/her:
-Снеданне?
-Каб рана паесці?
-А! Завтрак, будзе.
-Заўтра?? A сёння Sad

Russian завтрак (breakfast) sounds almost the same as Belarusian заўтра (tomorrow).

Here's one similar (from real life), Ukrainian-Russian.

The famous Marenych trio sings the song, "Тиша навкруги," and there are these words there:

"Ти скажи мені,
Любиш ти, чи ні..."

("You tell me, do you love me, or not...")

My Moscow friend, an ethnic Russian who is interested in Ukrainian language and culture, after listening to this song says to me:

"Юр, а Юр, ну вот я все понял. Она ему говорит, что вот, ты меня, мол, любишь - так вот тогда чини. Только вот я не понял, ЧТО же он должен чинить?"

("Look, I understand, she tells him that because he loves her, he has to fix something up (or to repair something); the only thing I don't understand is, just what is it that he has to fix up?)

(The Ukrainian "чи ні" - "or not" - sounds almost precisely like the Russian "чини" - "you repair," or "you fix something.")
Logged

Love never fails.
rakovsky
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Orthodox Church in America
Posts: 4,726



WWW
« Reply #7 on: June 20, 2010, 12:31:40 AM »

There is one funny Belarurian-Russian joke like this one.

Belarusian imigrant from the USA comes back to motherland. He/she stayed in a hotel and is asking the receptionist about the breakfast:
-Добры дзень, ці будзе снеданне?
Russian-speaking receptionist in Minsk's hotel cannot understand him/her:
-Снеданне?
-Каб рана паесці?
-А! Завтрак, будзе.
-Заўтра?? A сёння Sad

Russian завтрак (breakfast) sounds almost the same as Belarusian заўтра (tomorrow).

This is really funny. Unfortunately It does not work because everybody knows Russian there.
Logged
rakovsky
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Orthodox Church in America
Posts: 4,726



WWW
« Reply #8 on: June 20, 2010, 12:33:36 AM »

There is one funny Belarurian-Russian joke like this one.

Belarusian imigrant from the USA comes back to motherland. He/she stayed in a hotel and is asking the receptionist about the breakfast:
-Добры дзень, ці будзе снеданне?
Russian-speaking receptionist in Minsk's hotel cannot understand him/her:
-Снеданне?
-Каб рана паесці?
-А! Завтрак, будзе.
-Заўтра?? A сёння Sad

Russian завтрак (breakfast) sounds almost the same as Belarusian заўтра (tomorrow).

Here's one similar (from real life), Ukrainian-Russian.

The famous Marenych trio sings the song, "Тиша навкруги," and there are these words there:

"Ти скажи мені,
Любиш ти, чи ні..."

("You tell me, do you love me, or not...")

My Moscow friend, an ethnic Russian who is interested in Ukrainian language and culture, after listening to this song says to me:

"Юр, а Юр, ну вот я все понял. Она ему говорит, что вот, ты меня, мол, любишь - так вот тогда чини. Только вот я не понял, ЧТО же он должен чинить?"

("Look, I understand, she tells him that because he loves her, he has to fix something up (or to repair something); the only thing I don't understand is, just what is it that he has to fix up?)

(The Ukrainian "чи ні" - "or not" - sounds almost precisely like the Russian "чини" - "you repair," or "you fix something.")

And why not
Любишь ти, або ни?
Logged
Orest
High Elder
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 999


« Reply #9 on: June 20, 2010, 09:53:49 AM »

Quote
(The Ukrainian "чи ні" - "or not" - sounds almost precisely like the Russian "чини" - "you repair," or "you fix something.")


And why not
Любишь ти, або ни?
1) Because it doesn't rhyme.
2) Because we don't say that.
Logged
rakovsky
Protokentarchos
*********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: Orthodox Church in America
Posts: 4,726



WWW
« Reply #10 on: June 22, 2010, 01:56:18 AM »

Quote
(The Ukrainian "чи ні" - "or not" - sounds almost precisely like the Russian "чини" - "you repair," or "you fix something.")


And why not
Любишь ти, або ни?
1) Because it doesn't rhyme.
2) Because we don't say that.

I mean why isnt it grammatically right? "Abo" means "or", and what you want to say is "Do you love me or not?"
« Last Edit: June 22, 2010, 01:56:40 AM by rakovsky » Logged
Heorhij
Merarches
***********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox
Jurisdiction: GOA, for now, but my heart belongs to the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Posts: 8,576



WWW
« Reply #11 on: June 22, 2010, 08:24:06 AM »

Quote
(The Ukrainian "чи ні" - "or not" - sounds almost precisely like the Russian "чини" - "you repair," or "you fix something.")


And why not
Любишь ти, або ни?
1) Because it doesn't rhyme.
2) Because we don't say that.

I mean why isnt it grammatically right? "Abo" means "or", and what you want to say is "Do you love me or not?"

Yes, it is grammatically correct. It's just that in the song, the word for "or" is "chy" - a synonym for "abo."
Logged

Love never fails.
LizaSymonenko
Слава Ісусу Христу!!! Glory to Jesus Christ!!!
Global Moderator
Toumarches
******
Offline Offline

Faith: God's Holy Catholic and Apostolic Orthodox Church
Jurisdiction: Ukrainian Orthodox Church of the U.S.A.
Posts: 13,485



WWW
« Reply #12 on: June 22, 2010, 08:44:52 AM »


Любишь ти, або ни?

When read in Ukrainian it sounds like:

ти = the и sounds like the i in "hit".
and we don't say ни, we would say нi, which sounds similar to "knee".

Therefore, it does not rhyme - hit and knee (in Ukrainian).

In Russian the и makes a sound like "ee", so in Russian it would rhyme.


Logged

Conquer evil men by your gentle kindness, and make zealous men wonder at your goodness. Put the lover of legality to shame by your compassion. With the afflicted be afflicted in mind. Love all men, but keep distant from all men.
—St. Isaac of Syria
Fr.Andrei
Newbie
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2


« Reply #13 on: July 19, 2010, 05:37:03 PM »

This supposedly happened in a New York Russian Orthodox Church.A small girl,Ukrainian-speaking,approached the Chalice.The priest in Russian asked,"Tvojo imja?"(your name).In Ukrainian,the girl answered,"Ja zabula"(I forgot).The priest,non-Ukrainian,thought that she was giving her name,so he communed her,saying,"Pricastajetsja Raba Bozija Jazabula......"
Logged
Carl Kraeff (Second Chance)
Taxiarches
**********
Offline Offline

Faith: Orthodox Christian
Jurisdiction: OCA
Posts: 6,933



« Reply #14 on: July 19, 2010, 05:54:38 PM »

This supposedly happened in a New York Russian Orthodox Church.A small girl,Ukrainian-speaking,approached the Chalice.The priest in Russian asked,"Tvojo imja?"(your name).In Ukrainian,the girl answered,"Ja zabula"(I forgot).The priest,non-Ukrainian,thought that she was giving her name,so he communed her,saying,"Pricastajetsja Raba Bozija Jazabula......"

Father bless and welcome to the forum! Great joke.
Logged

Michal: "SC, love you in this thread."
deusveritasest
Taxiarches
**********
Offline Offline

Faith: None
Jurisdiction: None
Posts: 7,528



WWW
« Reply #15 on: July 19, 2010, 06:28:41 PM »

Yet, because of his heavy Belarussian accent, this sentence sounded like, "я постоянно перетрахиваю свой аппарат и знаю, кто врот, а кто не врот," i.e., "I always have sex with each member of my staff and I know who is into oral sex and who is not."  Roll Eyes Roll Eyes Roll Eyes

 Shocked Cheesy
Logged

I stopped posting here in August 2011 because of stark disagreement with the policies of the administration and moderating team of the forums. If you desire, feel free to PM me, message me on Facebook (link in profile), or email me: cddombrowski@gmail.com
Tags:
Pages: 1   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.18 | SMF © 2013, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
Page created in 0.074 seconds with 44 queries.