Author Topic: Orthodox Family  (Read 434 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Alxandra

  • High Elder
  • ******
  • Posts: 978
Orthodox Family
« on: February 04, 2017, 05:27:09 AM »
I thought these were such important points. Sadly, many Orthodox families fall into these broken family patterns in society, and the result can be seen in faithful families that have children distant from family and church. What are your thoughts? God bless

Orthodox Family…
by Rev. Fr. Alexy (Hieromonk Ambrose) Young


 Our lack of wholeness also affects our concept of the family. In our culture each member of the family is primarily concerned with his own private interests. Parents nurture a spirit of individualism which, in our day, has spawned such ideas as "Women's Liberation" (a term which Kireyevsky knew and analyzed) and "Gay Liberation". This lack of cohesiveness in the family has produced the most lifeless and sterile of environments for our children to grow up in: most homes are dominated by a television, which is often used to baby-sit children even when parents are at home. At the time of writing, 40% of American mothers work full or part-time outside of the home. As a result, children are encouraged to develop more and more outside interests which take them away from the home and the rest of the family as they "do their own thing." In the 20th century, the home has really become only a "house"-a place in which people take their meals and sleep.


  Kireyevsky contrasted this with the Orthodox home in which parents are actively involved with the rest of the family and where children are taught to live and work for the good of the whole family; where parents put selfish or private interests after the goal of creating a warm, living environment in which children actually learn more from the parents than from school or their peers.


 In a western family, the members rise in the morning and quickly scatter to their separate pursuits, returning home at different times in order to eat a quick dinner before again leaving to spend the evening elsewhere, in worldly pursuits. In the Orthodox family, the members awaken and gather before the household ikons while the father reads all or some of the Morning Prayers. Meals are taken together, with the parents presiding over and directing conversation. If there is a television at all, it is used with the greatest caution and parental control. Most evenings are spent quietly, either preparing for a feast or a fast, or in some other productive and family oriented activity. Parents read aloud the lives of the saints to their children.


Some have the pious custom of encouraging a child to read a saint's life aloud at a meal (often at Sunday dinner).


As Saint John Chrysostom writes:
"For just as with a general when his soldiery also is well organized the enemy has no quarter to attack; so, I say, is it also here: when husband and wife and children and servants are all interested in the same things, great is the harmony of the house. Since where this is not the case, the whole is oftentimes overthrown and broken up by one ... and that single one will often mar and utterly destroy the whole."


 Above all, the Orthodox home "is the abode where the members of the family will spend the majority of their lives. It is here, not in society, nor at the market place, where individuals will learn of the important things of the Christian life. It is in the Christian home that individuals will be able to work out their eternal salvation. It is in the Christian home that children will be raised and taught by word and action what it means to be a Christian. It is in the Christian home that all of the teachings of Christ and of the Church can be practiced."

http://orthodoxwayoflife.blogspot.se/2009/10/orthodox-family.html
« Last Edit: February 04, 2017, 05:27:49 AM by Alxandra »
"And if the man is the head of the family then the woman is the heart, and this heart is made by God that He may find rest in it”
+Elder Arsenie Papacioc

Blog http://the-woman-is-the-heart.tumblr.com/

Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/thewomanistheheart/

Offline hecma925

  • Non-clairvoyant, but you can call me Elder
  • Toumarches
  • ************
  • Posts: 12,920
  • Unbreakable! He's alive, dammit! It's a MIRACLE!
  • Faith: Truthful Chalcedonian Truther
  • Jurisdiction: Candle-lighting Cross Kisser
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #1 on: February 04, 2017, 05:29:46 AM »
It would be best if all members of a family become monastics, like the good days of yore.
Happy shall he be, that shall take and dash thy little ones against the rock. Alleluia.

Once Christ has filled the Cross, it can never be empty again.

"But God doesn't need your cookies!  Arrive on time!"

Offline NicholasMyra

  • Merarches
  • ***********
  • Posts: 8,358
    • Hyperdox Herman
  • Faith: Orthodox
  • Jurisdiction: Partially-overlapping
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #2 on: February 05, 2017, 10:05:15 PM »
Mennonite Odox
Quote from: Pope Francis
Thank God he said I was a politician because Aristotle defined the human person as 'Animal politicus.' So at least I am a human person.

Vote for a Ministry section on OC.net

Offline Opus118

  • Site Supporter
  • Archon
  • *****
  • Posts: 3,059
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #3 on: February 05, 2017, 11:52:47 PM »
There was a solution to this problem which worked well. It is called Unions. It is the family vs profit problem. The Unions lost. This is the society we live in now, but not when I grew up.
"Mi tío es enfermo, pero la carretera es verde!" - old Chilean saying

Offline Alxandra

  • High Elder
  • ******
  • Posts: 978
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #4 on: February 06, 2017, 06:37:19 AM »
Thank  you for the replies. I think its an important thing to think about, especially for new families.
"And if the man is the head of the family then the woman is the heart, and this heart is made by God that He may find rest in it”
+Elder Arsenie Papacioc

Blog http://the-woman-is-the-heart.tumblr.com/

Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/thewomanistheheart/

Offline Iconodule

  • Professor of Cryptopatristics at Miskatonic University
  • Toumarches
  • ************
  • Posts: 11,400
  • Monsters from the Id
  • Faith: Orthodox Christian
  • Jurisdiction: Ecumenical Patriarchate (ACROD)
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #5 on: February 06, 2017, 07:33:13 AM »
I think it's dangerous when we start patterning family life according to the imaginations of monks.
Quote
But it had not been in Tess's power - nor is it in anybody's power - to feel the whole truth of golden opinions while it is possible to profit by them. She - and how many more - might have ironically said to God with Saint Augustine, "Thou hast counselled a better course than thou hast permitted."
Thomas Hardy, Tess of the D'Urbervilles

Offline IreneOlinyk

  • Elder
  • *****
  • Posts: 416
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #6 on: February 06, 2017, 09:03:00 AM »
I think it's dangerous when we start patterning family life according to the imaginations of monks.
I agree.  Well said.  Especially the "imagination of monks" part - in this case a convert monk's imagination.

Offline Antonis

  • Μέγα το Θαύμα!
  • Archon
  • ********
  • Posts: 2,386
  • Faith: Orthodox Christian
  • Jurisdiction: GOA
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #7 on: February 06, 2017, 09:35:08 AM »
This is a nice post. Thank you, Alxandra!
You sound like a professional who knows what he's talking about.  That's because you are.

"This is the one from the beginning, who seemed to be new, yet was found to be ancient and always young, being born in the hearts of the saints."
Letter to Diognetus 11.4

Offline Alxandra

  • High Elder
  • ******
  • Posts: 978
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #8 on: February 06, 2017, 01:18:47 PM »
This is a nice post. Thank you, Alxandra!

Glory to God! :)
« Last Edit: February 06, 2017, 01:19:07 PM by Alxandra »
"And if the man is the head of the family then the woman is the heart, and this heart is made by God that He may find rest in it”
+Elder Arsenie Papacioc

Blog http://the-woman-is-the-heart.tumblr.com/

Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/thewomanistheheart/

Offline Alxandra

  • High Elder
  • ******
  • Posts: 978
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #9 on: February 06, 2017, 01:23:15 PM »
I think it's dangerous when we start patterning family life according to the imaginations of monks.

Forgive me dear Iconodule but I dont think its his imagination that children are babysat by televisions these days, and children are disconnected with their siblings and family. We can see a real crisis in family life today, and he gives very true and valuable reasons behind it. As well as valuable solutions.

How beautiful that he reminds us the importance of praying together, eating together etc for the health of the family :)
"And if the man is the head of the family then the woman is the heart, and this heart is made by God that He may find rest in it”
+Elder Arsenie Papacioc

Blog http://the-woman-is-the-heart.tumblr.com/

Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/thewomanistheheart/

Offline NicholasMyra

  • Merarches
  • ***********
  • Posts: 8,358
    • Hyperdox Herman
  • Faith: Orthodox
  • Jurisdiction: Partially-overlapping
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #10 on: February 06, 2017, 09:29:10 PM »

Forgive me dear Iconodule but I dont think its his imagination that children are babysat by televisions these days
I think that's more what people were saying in the 70's. Now you're supposed to say kids are on smartphones.
« Last Edit: February 06, 2017, 09:29:44 PM by NicholasMyra »
Quote from: Pope Francis
Thank God he said I was a politician because Aristotle defined the human person as 'Animal politicus.' So at least I am a human person.

Vote for a Ministry section on OC.net

Offline Arachne

  • Trinary Unit || Resident Bossy Boots
  • Moderator
  • Merarches
  • *****
  • Posts: 8,622
  • Chaos, panic and disorder. My work here is done.
  • Faith: Cradle Greek Orthodox. Cope.
  • Jurisdiction: Antiochian Archdiocese, UK
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #11 on: February 07, 2017, 08:35:48 AM »
I'm very amused by writers who bemoan the hours that mothers spend working outside the home, instead of hovering over their children, and completely gloss over the fact that, in the idyllic times before Women's Liberation, the norm for children was boarding school, with the ensuing months away from home and parents.

The particular author seems like a pronounced case of hiraeth (Welsh; a longing for a glorious past that may or may not have actually existed outside of legend). Russian peasant life might be his ideal family dynamics, but that doesn't mean it was the norm, even in Orthodox lands.

By all means, spend time with your spouse and children, as much time as possible. Most families are quite aware of the difficulties in this, and make conscious effort to cultivate common pursuits. On the other hand, it is important for everyone's mental health to not be joined at the hip with another. Each one needs the time and space to develop their individual interests.
'Evil isn't the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as evil, maybe more so, and it's a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against stupid. That might actually make a difference.'~Harry Dresden

Blog ~ Bookshelf ~ Jukebox

Offline hecma925

  • Non-clairvoyant, but you can call me Elder
  • Toumarches
  • ************
  • Posts: 12,920
  • Unbreakable! He's alive, dammit! It's a MIRACLE!
  • Faith: Truthful Chalcedonian Truther
  • Jurisdiction: Candle-lighting Cross Kisser
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #12 on: February 08, 2017, 02:30:04 AM »
the norm for children was boarding school, with the ensuing months away from home and parents.

Where?  And what class of people?
Happy shall he be, that shall take and dash thy little ones against the rock. Alleluia.

Once Christ has filled the Cross, it can never be empty again.

"But God doesn't need your cookies!  Arrive on time!"

Offline Arachne

  • Trinary Unit || Resident Bossy Boots
  • Moderator
  • Merarches
  • *****
  • Posts: 8,622
  • Chaos, panic and disorder. My work here is done.
  • Faith: Cradle Greek Orthodox. Cope.
  • Jurisdiction: Antiochian Archdiocese, UK
Re: Orthodox Family
« Reply #13 on: February 08, 2017, 04:10:09 AM »
the norm for children was boarding school, with the ensuing months away from home and parents.

Where?  And what class of people?

Greece, definitely. Russia as well, from what I know. For village people who didn't have a secondary school in their area. It was common all the way to the 1980s, and in fact, there are still some in function.

Before you ask 'what about children who didn't continue their education' - it was work time, often in other towns or cities. How often do you think maids or apprentices got to visit back home?
'Evil isn't the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as evil, maybe more so, and it's a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against stupid. That might actually make a difference.'~Harry Dresden

Blog ~ Bookshelf ~ Jukebox