Allowing her to heap sin upon herself by 1) failing to submit to your authority as head of the household and 2) forbidding you to worship on the most Holy of Holy days is not love, either.
Punch, I know... I wish I could change her and I am really trying very hard to do all I can. However, at the moment, she, even though she is a cradle infant-baptized Orthodox, is not a believer. She has exactly ZERO belief in anything written in Scriptures, conisiders all that an idle and harmful myth invented to facilitate the exploitation of people by priests and churches. She says that there may be a god, but there is absolutely no way for us to know whether this god is or is not. What she really believes in is all this mosaic of "progressive" politically correct ideas, like that a husband and a wife must share both responsibilities and authority, that no one should be forced to believe or not believe in any myths (that is, religions), and that we all simply need to be honest and kind and good to each other.
At this stage of our life, she is terribly vulnerable to any outward manifestation of religious beliefs by me. There are reasons for that, and I am very much to blame. In the past, I used to be susceptible to different kinds of non-Orthodox teachings; there was even a time when I listened to Jehovah's Witnesses (thank God, not for long - but she can't forget that). About four and a half years ago, I decided that I was a Protestant, and was baptized in a Presbyterian church, and became a member and an elser there, and dragged her into membership there. So, right now, my wife might fear that this "Orthodoxy" is just a next emotional attachment on my part, a next "hype" if you will.
Another thing is, she is very entrenched in thinking that only dumb, un-developed, un-sophisticated people do things like praying at home, signing themselves with the sign of the cross in public places, etc. Partially, this is so because we live in the deep South of the US, where religiosity is really, at least to some extent, a mark of being a redneck, a person who either has little brain or does not have the habit of using the brain. All our friends are "anti-rednecks," mostly international graduate students and faculty from Europe (France, Germany, the Netherllands, Portugal, Bulgaria), all having a "chip on the shoulder" against what they perceive as this stupid redneck provincial backward demeaning thing called "religion." We just don't have ANY other friends. We never socialize with anyone who has any religious beliefs, any religious convictions, habits, etc.
So yes, I am sinning greatly by allowing her to do exactly what you said - heaping sin on herself. But I don't know how to change this, save keeping my own faith, sticking to my prayer rule (trying to pray even when she deliberately turns the TV on to the max, or begins vacuum-cleaning right next to the corner in our living room where the icons are
), fasting, and being very good and kind and tender to her. And also keeping in touch with you guys through this Web forum.