Okay, I just have to say this. Bear with me, please.
I took several classes at the seminary that really drove home the damage that was done to Orthodoxy, the Byzantine Empire, and really to Christianity in general by the 4th crusade. It breaks my heart every time I think about it, because it wasn't just about the booty. It was the fact that the damage done by the 4th crusade set the Empire (and consequently Orthodoxy) on the road to decline, a road that was FAR off in the distance and would not have come nearly so soon had the crusade not been as damaging as it was. The 4th crusade opened the door to the invading Muslims by fatally weakening the empire, and every time I look at a picture of Agia Sophia, or hear about the persecutions that Christians (ALL Christians) suffer in Turkey, or death threats by Turks against Patriarch Bartholomew, I'm reminded of this and it makes me sad.
That being said, I also think that it's a bit of a waste of time doing the "what might have been" thing, and I think it is a) unbecoming of us, b) a waste of time and effort, and c) a setback in any and all ecumenical talks to keep bringing up the fact that the Catholic church was responsible for the 4th crusade and continually blaming them and demanding that they repent and repay us for it.
Please don't take this the wrong way... it's not meant as a challenge or a condemnation of anyone. I recognize that culturally, this wound is still very much alive and has been passed down through generations (keep in mind the oppression that the Greeks have suffered at the hands of the Turks- all of this can be traced back to that crusade). After all, I began this post by stating how hurt I still feel about it.
But I do believe in Christian forgiveness, and in moving on. I also DO appreciate all the steps that both Pope John Paul II and Pope Benedict have taken in repenting and repaying. I don't think we can ask for much more than what they have already done (being publicly apologizing for the crusades and returning the precious relics that they had--- especially considering that the relics belong to two saints that THEY revere as well as us; St. John Chrysostom AND St. Gregory the Theologian/Nazianzus).
Just my humble opinion. Hope I'm not offending or upsetting anyone. If so, I beg your forgiveness!