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Poll
Question: What is your favorite evangelical bumpersticker
My boss is a jewish carpenter - 9 (24.3%)
Warning in case of rapture car will be unmaned - 10 (27%)
Jesus fish eating the darwin fish - 3 (8.1%)
Hell no! we won't go! - 0 (0%)
I believe in the big bang theory, God said it and bang it happened - 3 (8.1%)
Other - 12 (32.4%)
Total Voters: 37

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Bono Vox
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« Reply #45 on: July 09, 2007, 05:20:47 PM »

I think a cool bumpersticker would be

Roman Catholic Church..Est. 1054 A.D
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« Reply #46 on: July 09, 2007, 06:17:03 PM »

I think a cool bumpersticker would be

Roman Catholic Church..Est. 1054 A.D

Why?  Others would be sure to follow
The Orthodox Church...Est. 33 A.D.
The Lutheran Church...Est. 1517 A.D.
The Anglican Church...Est. 1536 A.D.
The United Methodist Church..Est. 1736 A.D.
The United Church of Christ...Est. 1956

Should we also make some for the Nestorian and non-Chalcedonian Churches?

Armenian Orthodox Church...Est. 554 A.D.

Where will it end and what purpose would that serve?
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« Reply #47 on: July 09, 2007, 06:27:29 PM »

Quote
Why?  Others would be sure to follow
The Orthodox Church...Est. 33 A.D.
The Lutheran Church...Est. 1517 A.D.
The Anglican Church...Est. 1536 A.D.
The United Methodist Church..Est. 1736 A.D.
The United Church of Christ...Est. 1956

Should we also make some for the Nestorian and non-Chalcedonian Churches?

Armenian Orthodox Church...Est. 554 A.D.

Where will it end and what purpose would that serve?

I think those would be awesome bumper stickers too! The Orthodox church est 33A.D is already a bumper sticker. Our church bookstore used to sell them.

As to where will it end?? The answer is never! The fun never ends! The purpose? Humor!
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« Reply #48 on: July 09, 2007, 07:53:46 PM »

The best one would be the Baptist church sticker. "Est. 5 B.C., dissolved 35 A.D., then restarted at a fried chicken dinner sometime around 1880, we don't remember exactly, but it was definitely during my great-grandmother's lifetime because that's where she learned to make her famous fried chicken."
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« Reply #49 on: August 01, 2007, 12:22:14 AM »

A great message I saw on the sign board of a local Catholic church:


Christ wants to make you fishers of men.

You catch them, and He'll clean them.
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« Reply #50 on: August 05, 2007, 06:27:16 PM »

My favourite

"God doesn't believe in Atheists"
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« Reply #51 on: August 05, 2007, 11:50:13 PM »

My favourite

"God doesn't believe in Atheists"
You doubt God's existence?  God doesn't doubt yours.
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« Reply #52 on: August 06, 2007, 08:39:33 AM »

You doubt the existence of Zeus? He doesn't doubt your existence. And his wrath will pour down upon you! You better convert, just in case. Wink Tongue
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« Reply #53 on: August 06, 2007, 08:25:27 PM »

You doubt the existence of Zeus? He doesn't doubt your existence. And his wrath will pour down upon you! You better convert, just in case. Wink Tongue

I do not doubt the pantheon of the gods...only the plurality of hypostases Wink
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« Reply #54 on: August 20, 2007, 09:20:58 PM »

I think this is rather appropriate.
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« Reply #55 on: August 21, 2007, 06:37:04 PM »

I voted "Jesus fish eating the Darwin fish" because I used to have one on my car.  No, I wasn't an avid creationist (more of a, "God did it and that's all that matters" person).  But the Darwin fish had just started popping up on cars, and it really annoyed me.
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« Reply #56 on: August 21, 2007, 06:47:49 PM »

If nothing else, feel sorry for the protestant sector, they have NOTHING else to hold on to besides those rapture stickers. (annoying though they are)  Can you for one minute imagine having that as a crutch and hope for years, and having it ripped out from under you well into adulthood?  It's like having no oxygen suddenly rolling around untethered in space.

I'm new here, and now you've got me curious.  Please explain?
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« Reply #57 on: August 29, 2007, 11:32:33 AM »

I notice there are lots of rapture bumper stickers.  Protestants stick to this doctrine as devoutly as they believe in Christ himself.  It is a 'get out of end times and all your problems' card you get to flash eventually.  Truthfully, it brings comfort to many who have struggled against great adversity in their lives, people who had things done to them as children, those with disease, you can keep picturing people that would adamantly cling to this belief.  They have already struggled so much just to survive against all odds, then to have to face all that was purported to happen during the end times (tribulation)  Emotionally they could not bear the thought of going through those times, and if there were no need to then so much the better.
While I was still pondering the whole issue of the Theotokos and fasting, it came to my attention that there was no rapture.  None of the things I was initially struggling with could I defend, the truth was right in front of my face.  When my dh's godparent mentioned there was no theological support for the rapture I felt that tether snap.  When I could not prove its existence, the rug was ripped out from under me.  Being of relatively sound mind, I slowly began to see how long I had been misled into believing this and how deceptive the enemy can be.  Scripture was used to support the rapture all along, but even that is vague and twisted to support their cause.
Gradually I stopped spinning in space, and came to rest within Orthodoxy.  It might be particularly limited to the female experience in coming to the faith.  Whereas men can rush headlong into Orthodoxy like running straight away into a cold ocean, women slowly test the waters and immerse themselves bit by bit. (About a year later I read this comparison from Frederica so I know it's probably not just me)
Depending on how indoctrinated you are into the protestant realm, the more upheaval it causes to be suddenly illuminated by the light of truth.  The rapture, seen as a reward for your faithfulness, could therefore be a bit difficult to lose and probably more difficult still to admit you once believed in it.  A matter of loss, and then a matter of "how could I have been so stupid!"
My mother is watching us, and has repeatedly asked me questions toward this topic, and I don't want to burst her bubble as harshly as mine was burst.  Grin Her life has been great sorrow and pain, but the truth is the truth.  Maybe my reaction was particularly female, but I did note a great deal of consternation on dh's part in other matters. This from two people who had been searching for a long time, so I can't imagine someone that isn't ready for illumination hearing this rather bubble bursting news.
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« Reply #58 on: August 29, 2007, 07:16:42 PM »

I think I know what you mean about women "testing the waters."  It took me a year of study--and many times of saying "There's no way I can become Orthodox"--before I finally stepped foot into a Greek Orthodox Church.  I've been a catechumen for almost 9 months now, but I'm still a bit cautious, not jumping into chrismation (though I wanted to for a while).
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« Reply #59 on: August 31, 2007, 01:25:10 AM »

"Vegetables aren't food.  Vegetables are what food eats."
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« Reply #60 on: August 31, 2007, 05:08:34 PM »

^ I'll bet that was on the car of a Baptist.
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« Reply #61 on: August 31, 2007, 05:43:46 PM »

From a WELS Lutheran Church here in Omaha:

If people only used their Bibles as they did their cell phones!
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« Reply #62 on: August 31, 2007, 05:50:07 PM »

From a WELS Lutheran Church here in Omaha:

If people only used their Bibles as they did their cell phones!

Yeah, hold them up to their heads and blather on incessantly, especially in heavy traffic. 
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« Reply #63 on: August 31, 2007, 10:37:28 PM »

Yeah, hold them up to their heads and blather on incessantly, especially in heavy traffic. 
I remember a day many years ago when I was stuck in traffic at an intersection because of a slowpoke driver ahead of us.  On the rear of her car was a bumper sticker that said, "Hang up and drive."  When I finally passed her and could see into her car, what was she doing?  She was reading her mail. Roll Eyes
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« Reply #64 on: September 01, 2007, 01:17:04 PM »

She was reading her mail. Roll Eyes

Personally, I would rather people talk on their cell phones (as long as they keep an eye on the road and at least one hand on the wheel) than read their mail, which requires two eyes not on the road.  Yikes!
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« Reply #65 on: September 01, 2007, 01:19:40 PM »

Personally, I would rather people talk on their cell phones (as long as they keep an eye on the road and at least one hand on the wheel) than read their mail, which requires two eyes not on the road.  Yikes!
But did you catch the irony and hypocrisy of her bumper sticker, considering what she was doing to slow down traffic?
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« Reply #66 on: September 01, 2007, 08:38:30 PM »

Oh, definitely. We had a good laugh here over that. Cheesy It's amazing that seemingly everyone thinks they are an above-average driver and consequently have the right to judge everyone else's skill.
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« Reply #67 on: September 01, 2007, 08:55:01 PM »

Oh, definitely. We had a good laugh here over that. Cheesy It's amazing that seemingly everyone thinks they are an above-average driver and consequently have the right to judge everyone else's skill.
Which brings up a good question?  Why is it that in the USA everyone is above average?  Wouldn't this then lead to the conundrum of the average person being above average? Huh
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« Reply #68 on: September 02, 2007, 04:49:27 PM »

Which brings up a good question?  Why is it that in the USA everyone is above average?  Wouldn't this then lead to the conundrum of the average person being above average? Huh
Yep. Garrison Keillor alludes to this desire for perfection in his radio show A Prarie Home Companion. He concludes every show with the following: "That's the news from Lake Woebegone, where all the men are good-looking, all the women are pretty, and all the children are above average." That line is beautiful satire.
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« Reply #69 on: September 02, 2007, 07:50:34 PM »

Quote
^ I'll bet that was on the car of a Baptist.

Well, it certainly wan;t on the car of an Unitarian.
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« Reply #70 on: September 06, 2007, 05:06:29 PM »

Just seen on my way home from work:

I vote Bible.
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« Reply #71 on: September 06, 2007, 05:09:50 PM »

Hmmm.  And which ticket is Mr. Bible running on?   Roll Eyes Cheesy
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« Reply #72 on: September 06, 2007, 05:30:38 PM »

"That's the news from Lake Woebegone, where all the men are good-looking, all the women are pretty, and all the children are above average." That line is beautiful satire.

strong.. it's "All the women are strong, all the men are good looking and all the children are above average."  Cheesy

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« Reply #73 on: September 06, 2007, 06:26:14 PM »

^ I'll bet that was on the car of a Baptist.

I don't get it......which post are you referring to?? Doesn't make sense with the post I think it refers to....
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« Reply #74 on: September 07, 2007, 06:12:07 PM »

I don't get it......which post are you referring to?? Doesn't make sense with the post I think it refers to....
This one:
"Vegetables aren't food.  Vegetables are what food eats."
It's the one immediately preceding my post. I sometimes use the ^ just for a shortcut. I didn't realize with this one that it'd go to another page.
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« Reply #75 on: September 07, 2007, 06:13:19 PM »

strong.. it's "All the women are strong, all the men are good looking and all the children are above average."  Cheesy
Strong. Okay, I was trying to remember off the top of my head. Point still stands, though.
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« Reply #76 on: September 08, 2007, 12:21:11 AM »

This one:It's the one immediately preceding my post. I sometimes use the ^ just for a shortcut. I didn't realize with this one that it'd go to another page.

Ok, that's the one I thought it was.....I'm just unsure as to why a Baptist would not have that as a bumpersticker...
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« Reply #77 on: September 08, 2007, 01:04:56 AM »

Best bumper sticker that I thought fit the bill back when I was leaving the Protestant Church:

God save me from your followers!
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« Reply #78 on: September 08, 2007, 01:06:24 AM »

"Jesus and His lawyers are coming back"
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« Reply #79 on: September 08, 2007, 07:27:45 AM »

Ok, that's the one I thought it was.....I'm just unsure as to why a Baptist would not have that as a bumpersticker...
Ever been to one of their Sunday picnics? Six kinds of fried chicken, mashed potatoes with bacon bits smothered in gravy, beans with bacon, egg salad with bacon (and occasionally chicken). Go to one and try, just try to find a dish that doesn't have meat.
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« Reply #80 on: September 08, 2007, 09:53:44 AM »

Now I get it! Tongue
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« Reply #81 on: September 09, 2007, 09:12:02 PM »

"Keep Honking.  I'm Reloading."
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« Reply #82 on: September 09, 2007, 11:38:49 PM »

"I'm not as think as you drunk I am"
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« Reply #83 on: May 26, 2010, 06:58:56 AM »

One said: "My Karma ran over your dogma"

My vain little attempt at wit: "My dogma wizzed on your karma"
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« Reply #84 on: May 26, 2010, 11:09:11 AM »

I like one mocking evangelicals: "God was my co-pilot, but we crashed in the mountains and I ate Him.:  Shocked


I am confused, why would you assume this bumper sticker was singling out and mocking evangelicals

St. John Chrysosotom taught that God being our co-pilot, did you not know that? 
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« Reply #85 on: May 26, 2010, 11:19:16 AM »

I think I know what you mean about women "testing the waters."  It took me a year of study--and many times of saying "There's no way I can become Orthodox"--before I finally stepped foot into a Greek Orthodox Church.  I've been a catechumen for almost 9 months now, but I'm still a bit cautious, not jumping into chrismation (though I wanted to for a while).



A year?  That weren't very long...you must not have been a Reformed Reconstructionist Epistemological Post-millinialist.

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but when things go wrong
its Courteous whom I blame;
but its Grace who sees me through it.
zoarthegleaner
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« Reply #86 on: May 26, 2010, 11:25:08 AM »

Oh, definitely. We had a good laugh here over that. Cheesy It's amazing that seemingly everyone thinks they are an above-average driver and consequently have the right to judge everyone else's skill.
Which brings up a good question?  Why is it that in the USA everyone is above average?  Wouldn't this then lead to the conundrum of the average person being above average? Huh

We USA citizens have been taught from birth that we could be anybody we wanted to be, do anything we wanted to do and go anywhere we wanted to go; that made us above average in comparison to the rest of the worlds population, I would suggest.

John
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Courteous is my name,
and I have always aimed to live up to it.
Grace is also my name,
but when things go wrong
its Courteous whom I blame;
but its Grace who sees me through it.
jah777
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« Reply #87 on: May 26, 2010, 11:29:56 AM »

I guess we aren't just sticking to Evangelical bumper stickers anymore, but this is one that I actually like because it is true:

"Give the Devil an inch, and he will become your ruler."

Otherwise, I really dislike these Christian stickers and T-shirts.  While from a certain perspective they are funny in a ridiculous way, they also tend to trivialize God and the Christian faith.  In other words, I find most of them offensive rather than humorous.    
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genesisone
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« Reply #88 on: May 26, 2010, 11:33:59 AM »

I guess we aren't just sticking to Evangelical bumper stickers anymore, but this is one that I actually like because it is true:

"Give the Devil an inch, and he will become your ruler."

Otherwise, I really dislike these Christian stickers and T-shirts.  While from a certain perspective they are funny in a ridiculous way, they also tend to trivialize God and the Christian faith.  In other words, I find most of them offensive rather than humorous.    

We do agree on this. However, and in light of what you and I have just agreed on, those bumper stickers, t-shirt slogans, etc., it is perhaps unfortunate that they do work. We all know dozens of commercial jingles.
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