Y'know, the scenario you describe is one that gives me nightmares.
Very often, people come to me for advice, and I have to be very, very careful when giving this advice that I don't bruise the person's feelings (or at least, not any more than they need to be bruised, especially when the situation they need advice for is something that resulted directly from an injudicious use of their own egos...)
But, I've said this before and I'll say it again: people respond to love. I'm not talking about some fake love where you sound like some kind of bizarre counselor where everything is OK, but instead placing your own ego aside, and concentrating on the other person...well, my experience is that people respond to that. They'll open up to you gradually, and then you don't argue them to Church...you've loved them to it!